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It's the Bible.

[More bonus audio to come!]

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Anonymous

Preach!

Anonymous

Oh man! The good book. i remember reading these passages out of boredom in church when i was being screamed at by the preacher. Good god what a dated text. Marcus' sublte sarcasm is so welcome. it really draws out the ridiculousness of it all. People believe this

Anonymous

SPOILER ALERT: God has to choose between nuking Boston or saving his son

Anonymous

Wow, even when read with charisma it's still dreary nonsense. So sick of the phrase "and it was good".

Anonymous

The "Noah knows!" joke was very much appreciated.

Anonymous

You have such a soothing voice I forgot what bullshit was coming from it. Thank you Marcus. This is so relaxing and wonderful.

Anonymous

Like, how did god even know that water was water. Does he even have the same name for it as we do? I’ve smoked just the right amount of weed.

Anna Garcia

I freakin love the way you read this Marcus LOLOLOLOL I'm actually catholic so it's cool to me but it's also hilarious to hear your inflections & crazy character & I just could not possibly love this more 😂

Anonymous

When you have a great orator reading what originally was an Oral Tradition copied to written word, it is pure gold! Love it Marcus, can't wait for you to do the Vedras or Quran!

elle marr

100% increased my sub just for this, i am giggling like a small child and it's been all of a minute. thank you for giving this wild mess a reading in the tone it deserves

Anonymous

I kept thinking about becoming a patreon supporter but always put it off until I heard "Marcus is reading the Bible" and that was it. I signed up and that's the first thing I went too! I love it!