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This is the first Patreon Sketch, brought to you by Echo. The prompt was essentially wanting to see a story about a woman going after a ghost whose possession caused growth and for that to turn out not the way she expected.

Contains: Breast Expansion, Hyper, Hourglass Expansion, weight gain, Possession, lesbian makeouts, breast worship, the makings of an orgy

Comments

William McDuff

There's some interesting ideas in this, and your writing is great, but I feel like this has some pacing issues. You're starting page 5/11 when they meet Yvette/Jessica, and the rest feels rushed. The coin comes up suddenly, and it feels like the rest needs more room so the Aya/Yvette conflict gets some space as well as Kelly's greed for curves versus saving her friend. The growth scenes are kind of like the moments of horror in Stephen King novels in that they want as much room as they can get. (Make your own growth in confined space joke here, folks.) Still, interesting work as always. I am curious how you'd write with a simple conflict where all the space was for the feeling of growth and the temptation to keep going. (Um, four gallon jug of growy potion, drops make visible swelling in the body part, girlfriend has dreamed of you being 'as big as possible', but she can't have meant this big, but it feels so good to grow.) Right, thanks for the writing! :)

Misty F.

Yeah... It was a challenge to fit this much world building in and still have space for everything else. Even then, the rules are still being set up until the very end. Probably would have been better served by starting earlier, summarizing more of Yvette's story and building Aya/Kelly up a bit more. This, however, is why I consider these "sketches" and why I am going back and polishing the old stories. I always have more to learn as far as being a writer goes and each story that is good but still misses the mark is another opportunity to improve. Really appreciate the thoughts. This is the kind of feedback I love.