[Spirit of Lust] Chapter 201: True understanding. (Patreon)

Aoi’s first instinct was to jerk away in shock, but she resisted it. Instead, she pulled away slowly to see William’s eyes half open, his eyelids heavy.

“A-Amelia? Cynthia?” he asked softly, weakly, tiredly.

Aoi’s chest tightened. Of course he would think of them. Her own body and weight was most similar to those two than any of the others, and he had no reason to think that it was Aoi. And yet it was a little frustrating for no logical reason.

“Aoi,” she corrected softly.

His eyebrows rose ever so slightly in surprise, but his eyes remained half closed. “W-Why…?”

“It’s for your own good,” she told him. Her heart was pounding faster, and she licked her lips to taste the lingering presence of his again. “I’m sorry I started without asking. Do I have your permission to continue?”

A small smile crossed his lips and he interlocked his own fingers with hers with a weak grip. He chuckled shakily. “I’m sorry. This shouldn’t make me happy, but…” He let out a soft breath. “Go on.”

It made him happy? Aoi swallowed and deliberately tried to ignore those words, ignore the quickening pace of her already racing heart.

He was half-conscious. She didn’t know if this made things harder or easier. Regardless, she had already started it and had to see it through.

She took his hand to her chest and let him feel her. His fingers moved as if to grope, but had little strength to do so. Still, it sent shivers down Aoi’s back. She leaned forward again and met William’s woken lips. He seemed to act on instinct or habit, for his tongue matched her even with its languid movements.

It felt good. It felt better than kissing him while asleep. How would it feel to kiss him when they both had all their faculties? To kiss him when he could hold her close? To have him touch her chest with those dexterous hands?

Fuck. She was getting wet already and her pussy even seemed to throb in anticipation. She had to remind herself that most of this came from the powers of the Spirit of Lust.

She was getting distracted. Her task was to guide William’s aether flow towards the correct course. All this was just a means to achieve that, she reminded herself. Thankfully, it seemed to be working. She felt her own aether approaching his… and then she touched it.

It was a torrent of lust and desire, like a lifetime of arousal condensed into a single moment. That was what flowed inside William, that was what Ishtar was made of. It threatened to overwhelm her with the same such feelings, and in resisting them, she understood.

It was no wonder this young man sought multiple partners. It was no wonder everything around him revolved around sex. She thought she understood it, and intellectually speaking, she did, but this… This said more than any words ever could.

This was what Ishtar was. A being of desire, pleasure, passion, yearning, ardor and urges. Sex was ingrained in her core just as strongly as the survival instinct is in all living beings. Sex WAS survival, but also it was also pleasure and growth. And this being, this being of Lust had intertwined herself with this young man’s soul.

It was a wonder that William retained as much of himself as he had. A calling this strong would have overwhelmed most, if not outright overwritten their very beings. What made him resist this? What helped him keep his soul from being overwhelmed by this powerful directive and turned into a puppet for Ishtar’s every whim?

‘A stupid and naive desire for love and complete loyalty combined with the stubbornness to deny it when it wasn’t on his terms.’

It was a voice she didn’t know, but Aoi knew who it was. Ishtar. She always heard her speak with William’s voice, but this time she was speaking directly inside her mind. The direct contact must’ve made it possible.

‘Despite the betrayals he suffered, Will resisted me every step of the way. I pushed him towards the path of domination. I urged him to take every woman for himself, to claim them his property and enforce their loyalty so that he would never suffer again in the same way.

‘He denied me as best he could, perhaps better than anyone else could have. His flesh demanded untold carnal pleasure, yet his heart was a void of despair he kept well hidden. False love and unwilling loyalties would never satisfy him, yet the craving for pleasure remained. That is the path that led us to where we are now.

‘Even now, Will is… confused, stumbling through life searching for a foothold, and as much as I wish I could, I can't grant it to him. I am the one who instilled chaos in his already struggling mind. I took advantage of his weak mental state and dragged him to do things he never wanted to do. I do not regret it, for it is what led me to be here with him, but… I do wish I could’ve done things differently.’

Aoi asked Ishtar a question. She didn’t word it, but thought it, and the spirit answered.

‘William is… more than a friend, more than a partner, more than a lover. His soul and mine are connected. Everything that I am demands that I join him in body as well. Until that time comes, I need to rely on others to be his support in the material world. Reina, Cynthia and the others do good work.’

Aoi took it all in. Then, she asked another, wordless question.

‘Yes. Will would be overjoyed.’

With that, Aoi made up her mind once and for all.

She sat up on the bed and moved swiftly. In seconds, her shirt and her bra were discarded on the floor.

No more pretending.

She would be his foothold.