The App 10 (Patreon)

The App

Chapter 10

-VB-

“Bagrat” was a name he took pride in. It was a name that stepped out from internet forums to irritate and spook even the PRT directors with how accurately he discerned information from their networks.

Oh, he knew that the PRT thought him a parahuman cape.

Maybe he was.

Maybe he wasn’t.

If he was a parahuman, then they would charge him for parahuman crimes, and if he wasn’t, then they would charge him for parahuman crimes, because he involved himself in parahuman affairs more often than not.

It wasn’t like they knew that a Stranger lived in New York City and literally strolled into their NYC branch. Hell, he spent days living in that building before and no one noticed. He could open locks and no one would notice. He could access computers and no one would notice. He could literally move someone’s head into position for him to use their retina to open doors, and they would think that they meant to go through that door. He could hold anyone by their shoulders and look over their shoulders, and they would not notice him.

As long as he did not attack anyone, then no one would notice him.

So how did Mel pierce through his power and see him?

“[I just wanted to give you an invitation to an exclusive club, Bagrat. That’s all,]” Mel giggled before she hung up on him, and forced his app to pull him into a private Tavern server.

He was immediately inundated with welcomes.

[Grey Rat]: Oh, he’s here, guys~!

[Pygmy Elephant]: Ah, shit. Is he gonna leak our conversations, too?

[Mel]: Now, now. Don’t be afraid of him. He already knows not to leak information directly from here. Right?

“Bagrat” gulped as he slowly typed out his answer.

[Spotted Owl]: I won’t. I know the consequences of what will happen if I do. I guess I’m now Spotted Owl.

[Mel]: See? Welcome to the Zoo! Remember to read the rules and notes here. For now, I’ll be gone but if any of you have a question, then don’t be shy and ask them. I’m sure someone will help, and if they don’t, then I will~!

“Bagrat” followed the link and read the rules there. The Zoo was a gathering of influential individuals from around the world. It was a private server meant to facilitate connection, exchange of goods and services, and mediate conflicts between members. It was, in essence, a private group not just for the ultra rich but also those capable of receiving invitation to it.

Sure, there were a few rich members, according to the rules and notes, but they were not the primary candidate for invitation; invitation was only handed out by Mel, and she was picky.

There were a few rules, but the one that stood out to him was “Equivalent Exchange.”

For example, if someone wanted to ask for information, then they had to find someone with said information and pay them for it, and the payment had to match the scarcity of the information. Alexandria’s civilian identity, an explicit example stated in the notes, was worth $5 billion dollars at minimum. Failure to comply to this “equivalent exchange” rule or circumventing the Zoo after getting in contact would be met with severe consequences.

[White Jaguar]: Sup, mate. I’m W.Jaguar. Nice to meet you, and welcome to the Zoo. I don’t know who you are, but I hope you enjoy your time here.

[Tiny Lion]: Welcome, Spotted Owl. I think it’s just eight of us online right now. Did you read the rules?

[Spotted Owl]: Yes.

[Tiny Lion]: Good. The last guy who didn’t is dead.

“Bagrat” almost let out a whimper at that.

[Spotted Owl]: What did he do?

[California Newt]: Oh oh oh! I wanna answer!

[Tiny Lion]: Go ahead.

[California Newt]: So this guy, who was called Merlin here in the Zoo

[California Newt]: By the way, that’s an actual falcon species name. Its so fking cool

[California Newt]: Anyways, he thought that the public should know about some of the things he learned here. Like the fact that eight of our members more or less controlled the stock market!

‘Wait, that conspiracy was real?!’ Bagrat thought excitedly.

[California Newt]: he decided to ignore Mel!

[California Newt]: So Mel had him killed and video-taped it. It was so fking gorey! D:

He clicked the link tied to the word gorey.

Bagrat felt cold sweat break out as a woman screamed piercingly as she dropped into a literal meat grinder.

[California Newt]: Anyway. Merlin’s dead because she decided to break the rules without going about it the right way! She could have left evidence behind for people, which is allowed, but you can’t just outright leak information like that!

[Tiny Lion]: Quite. I personally don’t agree with Mel’s method of control, but all of us knew what we were going to find when we chose to enter the Zoo. Don’t you, Spotted Owl?

[Spotted Owl]: Yeah. Mel told me personally.

[African Hyena]: Please follow the rules. I hate cleaning up after Mel.

[Tiny Lion]: Hyena is Mel’s cleaner.

[Spotted Owl]: so… what do you all do that got you Mel’s invitation? If you don’t mind answering?

[Tiny Lion]: I rule a country.

[California Newt]: I do little things like backstabbing, lying, infiltration, mass murder, and taking out the trash. Beware! >:D. Also, my services are cheap if you can get me interested. What about you? Mel hasn’t told us, just that you would be joining us.

Bagrat felt his eyes pop out, but his sweaty hands and fingers quickly typed out a response.

[Spotted Owl]: Intelligence work.

[California Newt]: You’re just like me! Hooray!

[Tiny Lion]: Ignore C.Newt. That’s a fake persona.

[California Newt]: Hey, you’re not supposed to tell him that!

[African Hyena]: Everyone knows you’re a creepy motherfucker.

[California Newt]: I!

[California Newt]: Am!

[California Newt]: NOT!

[California Newt]: CREEPY!

[Tiny Lion]: A.Hyena and C.Newt always get in each other’s throat, so ignore em. Still, intelligence work, huh? You taking favors?

[Spotted Owl]: Maybe. What are you looking for?

[Tiny Lion]: I want to know which of the reps in Congress are pedophiles. I’ll pay you $25,000 per actionable intelligence per person.

Bagrat fell on his ass as he lost the strength in his legs.

[California Newt]: Boo! That’s too cheap and you know it! Hey, S.Owl, I’ll pay you $100,000 for every blackmail-able Protectorate hero secret! Like like if they’re a Cauldron agent or something!

Wait, that’s real, too?!

Fuck! Is Void cursed or something? That’s the shit conspiracy he pushed!

And then Bagrat felt his stomach drop.

What if Void was a handle for one of Zoo’s people? Did he make an enemy of someone already in here?

[Copperhead]: Are you sure you want to go that way? Cauldron’s not gonna let you just fk over their own agents.

[Spotted Owl]: wait, is void cowboy a member of the Zoo?

[California Newt]: kek

[Tiny Lion]: hell nah. I’d leave if he was.

[California Newt]: I choked on water cuz of u

[African Hyena]: he is someone I am leaking some info to.

[California Newt]: O.o

[Spotted Owl]: why?!

[White Jaguar]: that bitch-ass American teenager? Whatever the fk for?

[Copperhead]: srsly? I thought he was a cape. I owe G.Rat money now, because of you. Fk u.

[African Hyena]: because it’s absolutely hilarious how, even though the truth is told to them, everyone ignores it.

[Spotted Owl]: Void is obnoxious. Maybe that’s why?

[Copperhead]: I’m done.

Copperhead left the Zoo.

[Tiny Lion]: like literally telling him or…?

[African Hyena]: he thinks he came up with all of the idea. He doesn’t suspect that a Master is planting those thoughts in his head, and if he dies to Cauldron, then that’s that and I’ll find someone else to leak info.

[Spotted Owl]: That’s allowed? I thought no leaking.

[Tiny Lion]: it’s not exactly breaking the rules. If Mel hasn’t killed him yet, then it’s allowed, but why is it allowed?

[California Newt]: That’s so unfair!

[California Newt]: like I wanna do that, too!

Bagrat already learned too much. He wanted to lay down and go to sleep.

[Spotted Owl]: all of this hurts my brain. I’m off.

Spotted Owl left the Zoo.

Bagrat sat there on his ass in his room and then let out a shuddering sigh.

It was real.

He ran his hands down his face and groaned as he got up, only to drop himself back to his bed.

Ring ring.

He froze and stared at the phone still in his hand. Hesitantly, he turned on the screen and then grimaced.

[Mel].

He slid the answer icon across the screen and then brought the phone to his ear. “Yes…?”

“[Did you enjoy it?]” she asked him.

He took a deep breath in and let it out slowly. “I feel like I got myself involved in some deep shit.”

Mel giggled. “[Well, that’s the nature of the Zoo. At the very least, you don’t break any rules for a full year.]”

And then his pounding heart started thundering now.

“A full year…?” he muttered in horror.

“[I have a precog on the side who does some work for me. Ah, but don’t feel too bad. Precogs always say that the future is not set in stone. It’s just unlikely that you won’t break any rules in your first year. Just get used to playing the rules, and you’ll be alright!]”

“R-Right…”

“[Well, have a good night, then! I also upgraded your subscription from Investigative to Secretive, free of charge!]”

And then she hung up on him again.

After a few moments, Bagrat curled up in his bed and dreamed of days when he just had fun trolling people online on how he got his information.

-VB-

A/N: So I recently read “Rocket’s Exterminator” by BANIX, and in the most recent chapter, a secret underworld cabal that’s been around for over hundreds of years has been introduced, but the way they chat and do favors for each other got me interested. Which is how this chapter came about to be~! And California Newt is a direct reference to Rocket’s Exterminator.

Anyways, I highly recommend all of BANIX’s stories, especially “I Just Want To Travel the World.”