Zabuza's S.Adventures 3: Battle of the Bridge (Patreon)

Zabuza’s S.Adventures
Chapter 3: Battle of the Bridge

-VB-

Zabuza flexed his right arm, and inspected it for any fault.

“Healed,” he grunted in satisfaction. He turned to Haku, who stood waiting for him. “How are the tree lovers doing?” It was only prudent to keep tab on his current enemies. As such, he had sent Haku to keep an eye on them.

“They aren’t ready for the both of us,” she replied factually and not a hint of playfulness. “All of the genins are below my level in terms of combative effectiveness, and the jounin seems to suffer from some kind of chakra exhaustion.” 

“Ho? It’s been a month since we fought. He’s still feeling the effects of chakra exhaustion?”

“It may have to do with his nightly activities with one of his genins.”

“... He’s fucking one of the girls?”

“Yes.”

Zabuza shrugged.

“Good for us, I guess. How close is the bridge construction to finish?”

“I estimate a month at their current work pace.”

“Is it the limit of their work pace or are they sandbagging?”

“They are doing their best to complete the bridge, though I do not understand why they think it’ll keep standing, especially when a three dozen demolition tags would put an end to it.”

“Don’t ask me. I’m not a fisherman.” He cracked his neck side to side, making his bones p-p-pop pop with each straining. Straightening back up, he gestured to Haku to follow him. “Let’s get back to doing our job.”

And prepare for the inevitable betrayal by the idiotic businessman.

“Oh!”

“Hmm?”

“Is it alright if I finish off Gato? I think castrating him and leaving him for the Wave will be a fitting punishment for double crossing us.”

“... You’re a sadistic bitch, aren’t you?”

“Only the best for you, sir.”

“You dare say you know what’s best for me?”

“Only because you said so yourself.”

“What exactly did I say?”

Haku looked up with a flushed face and a smile. “The only holes you’ll need.”

He choked for a moment. 

-VB-

The fight was ending not in his favor. 

Zabuza’s legs gave away at the last second as the copycat’s chittering lightning attack came for his chest. Had his legs not given away, then he would have been struck by the attack.

He hit the ground and his head bounced painfully off of the admittedly superb construction of the bridge. 

Kakashi moved to strike Zabuza down when there was a twang. Instead of finishing him off, the copycat parried an arrow and looked up. Zabuza too tilted his head towards the unfinished section of the bridge… where Gato and a hundred mercenaries, thugs, and ronin stood. 

“You couldn’t even finish off a bunch of teenagers and a lone ninja?!” Gato growled, though it was obviously he wasn’t putting in much effort in his shouts nor was he sounding any less surprised. “Forget this. Your contract with me is terminated!”

Zabuza stared at the idiot for a moment before looking back up at Kakashi. “I think our adversarial relationship ends here,” he grunted as he got up slowly.

“Fair enough,” the white-haired Konoha-nin replied coolly. “Wanna help us?”

“I already planned on punishing the midget.”

Zabuza got up fully and hefted his blade over his shoulder. He felt his body and considered it ready for … pest control.

Haku shunshined next to his side and knelt. “Orders?” she asked, looking no worse than at the start of this bridge fight. 

“You can do whatever you want with Gato after I’ve dealt with him.”

“Of course.”

“Other than that, go wild.”

What happened afterward was a slaughter. Against two jounins, a chunin, and three genins, the crowd of hired swords did absolutely jack shit. Their swords swung to hit, but found no target, even among the genins. Their archers were pitiful, going down in the first opening bout as kunais struck them with precision. Some tried to run. Zabua made sure they never got off of the bridge. 

And then there was only Gato left after ten minutes of slaughter. 

“W-Wai-!”

Zabuza grabbed the midget’s mouth and ripped off his lips with his monstrous strength. The tycoon screamed like a banshee.

It was pathetic.

“Haku, do whatever you want with him.”

Haku was by his side in seconds.

And a few seconds later, Gato squealed like a dying pig. 

Zabuza raised an eyebrow when he saw all of the genins gag and throw up. He turned to Kakashi, and the man shrugged. 

It was just then that the Wave’s villagers appeared from the mists that he and Haku had created when they were fighting the Konoha-nin. They came to a skidding stop no more than a hundred meters away the Konoha genin furthest from the slaughter. 

“W-What’s going on?” one of the villagers who was slower on the uptake asked, bewildered. 

“This idiot broke the contract,” Zabuza said before kicking the midget where it would hurt the most: in his newly castrated crotch. The midget sobbed in pain. Annoyed by the mess, he grabbed the midget’s hair, earning him some screams, and threw him towards the villagers. They backed away as a screaming body rolled and tumbled to their feet. “All yours.”

The villagers stared at Gato and Gato at them in shock.

It wasn’t long before one of the villagers holding a pitchfork struck.

And crossbows fired. 

Zabuza whistled as an impromptu stab fest broke out. “Man, those villagers are vicious,” he chuckled. “Not as vicious as my home village.”

Haku hummed. “I’m sure they have a lot of frustration to let out.”

Kakashi stared at the villagers for a moment before the copycat turned back to look at him, though his eyes had never strayed far from him in the first place. 

“What are you going to do now?” 

“Hmm?” Zabuza uttered in confusion at the question. “Why are you asking me?”

“Just curious.”

“So you can track me down for my bounty?”

“Nah. Too much work. Hokage is also supportive of the rebellion.”

Zabuza’s grip tightened in his hand. “... How do you know about that?”

“Why else would one of the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist take up a sleazy businessman on his offer for work?”

He huffed in reply.

“If you would like, then Konohagakure would like to offer you refuge.”

That made his head snap to the copycat.

“What are you playing at?”

Kakashi chuckled. “Not much. Having a temporary ninja, one as strong as the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist, working for the village is beneficial, not to mention that it would benefit our relationship with the rebellion and then the new Kirigakure, if the rebellion succeeds.”

Zabuza looked around. The genin were staring in horror at the villagers as they strung up Gato’s dead body on a pole and marched back to their village in celebration; none of them were paying attention to their talk like green horns they were.

“You need to train your genins better.”

“I realized.”

Zabuza thought about it. Personally, he did want to settle down, if only to finally make a baby with Haku. At the same time, he was still loyal to the idea of Kirigakure, just not its current iteration of tyranny and bloodline slaughter. But he also didn’t like the current leader of the rebellion, Terumi Mei. The bitch was just … bipolar and hypersensitive.

Settling down in the strongest hidden village in the known world? 

It was a tempting offer.

“Asylum, huh?”

“Due to your status as a nuke-nin of Kirigakure, we can’t exactly offer you much, but you’ll at least be able to achieve residency and probationary ninja registration.”

“Right, I heard about that. Konoha really doesn’t give a shit where your ninjas come from, huh?”

“It helps that we have the best intelligence and counterintelligence department.”

Zabuza tsked. “The world fucking knows that. Bloody Yamanaka’s.”

“So?”

“... I’m thinking.”

Haku also wanted to settle. He wanted to settle, if only to finally do the deed. 

He sighed. 

“I, Momochi Zabuza of the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist, ask Hatake Kakashi of the Konohagakure for asylum,” he declared formally, drawing the attention of Haku and the Konoha genins.

“I, Clan Head Hatake Kakashi and jounin of Konohagakure, hereby accept your asylum request on behalf of Konohagakure. Please hand over your primary weapon for the duration of our return to Konohagakure.”

“Will I get it back after your mind feelers look through my head?”

“Sure.”

He tossed the huge blade to the copycat, and the man caught it easily despite being smaller. Zabuza raised an eyebrow. “Were you going easy on me?”

“Never!” the copycat eye-smiled. “Though I may have not been using all of the jutsus I could have used to preserve the bridge.”

“Fair enough.” 

“WAAAH?!” the blonde one shouted. “What the hell is going on?!”

Kakashi turned to the blonde genin, at which point Haku gave him the signal that this girl was the one the copycat was fucking. 

“Asylum business. Nothing complicated.”

The Konoha genins stared at him and Haku, gawking. 

Haku giggled.

-VB-

Next time on ZSA!
Zabuza meets the Fifth Hokage!