Tears of Frust (Patreon)

Good evening my dears! I hope you are doing alright today! 

Up for download and viewing is a digital piece titled " Tears of Frust " Inspired by the girl next door's " Serenity w/girl in red " which can be found here https://soundcloud.com/imyourlovergirl/serenity-w-girl-in-red

As well a little snippet of a certain queen. 

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I will admit that I have not been doing all that well for a bit. And that I have been trying to find my rhythm again, to find my place. I just woke up one day and felt cold again inside. Like an early morning's fog was inside my mind. 

The words, they could not come to me. My muse who like a bird had seemingly taken flight, left me behind and I so quickly came to miss its sounds.

I kept trying, and I keep trying to find myself again, to feel that joy. To feel....anything other than what I have been. I keep trying.

Like a record wobbled off its track, I just keep slipping. My mind is full of light, my eyes heavy. I feel....tired....

Do you know what this feeling is like? That despite whatever accomplishments you have made, that no matter how how far you have come, in the briefest instance you feel lost again. 

And you ask yourself that silent question you've begged and pleaded never to remember because it's been said to you so many times " What is wrong with you? " 

These feelings...they are terrible, and they are real...but they can be beautiful. This pain deep inside, this unconscious doubt, these tears of frustrations...these howls of mourning and fury...can be more than an ugliness or illness...it must be more than this.

My muse...hasn't left me. Yours hasn't left you either. It's still here, still inside us. Quieted, waiting. That's why we are so saddened, so angry, and so torn. We're not giving ourselves time...