Friday Update #35: Sockarooni (Patreon)
Content
As a word of warning, the second half of this post contains very heavy spoilers for the Keisuke route.
Hey folks, I’ve got a cool Friday update talking about how I am going to commit financial suicide by pissing of the primarily trans lesbian demographic that this game somehow ended up with because I'm going back to the het route that's been very close to fully outlined (yes, you may see that outline).
Source: Goblin Slayer
This is how I feel between making a transbian Discord server and the unintentional egg-smashing power of this game...
So this is the first month since re:Dreamer switched over to monthly updates instead of updates every 2 weeks.
This Patreon's Graphtreaon page (and my own metrics) do show a bit of a drop in revenue, but I mean, the options are killing myself with updates every 2 weeks or not doing that with updates every month.
That's not really an option, but what is an option for keeping a fuller tip jar (because that's kind of what this Patreon is) is sticking with the Britney route that makes me money instead of going back to Keisuke’s...
So of course, my dumbass self is doing the exact opposite.
I could give a long rambling reason about why I think this is actually a good idea, but Keisuke’s route is much more clearly outlined that Britney’s route (and it has been from the start). I need time to think about the details of the second half of Britney’s route after the winter break to really make sure I am working towards that goal instead of running in place as I figure out what that goal is.
Also, the game is supposed to function on 1/3 Britney, 1/3 Keisuke, 1/3 patron vote for route focus (with the ratios changed to 1/4 and Rich being added once we get the sprites, probably in late January).
3 years, 2 intro rewrites, and 1 game dev who now has a much better understanding of what I am doing later, Keisuke’s Day 1, Day 2, and Day 3 writing is some of the oldest extant writing in re:Dreamer. It is still good writing (which is why it hasn’t been scrapped), but it needs polish to match the level of quality from the middle of the Day 2 Britney mall day onward. Plus, I want to add the new CGs for the dorm room sex scenes + its alternatives as they are now almost entirely done.
I’m thankfully not getting anywhere close to throwing the baby out with the bathwater, as my primary concern is with sprite expressions, animations, sounds, and C.H.E.A.T.S. variants, although some minor edits to better phrase a line here or there or locking the longer and more rambling sections behind a higher Awkwardness stat are in progress too.
For some examples of what I've been doing...
Zach's red eyes are really sensitive to bright light and are in fact just weird, and now that the beach outfit sunglasses with so much use are in the game, Zach will leave the dorm and going back for his sunglasses with Control 4 and not forget to take his sunglasses with him with Control 5:
Don't worry: those last 2 screens of text don't show up unless you have Awkwardness 5.
From then on, Zach will have sunglasses when walking to Keisuke's dorm:
Although he'll take them off when talking to people:
Zach can use his red eyes to try and intrigue Keisuke into stepping out of the dorm room to meet him:
If Zach goes down this path, Ryouichi explains Zoey as "weird" instead of "hot" when Keisuke asks for more details:
Keisuke can add this if Ryouichi never mentioned Zoey's age (he's thinking of Zach's mom as that's the only girl he knows with red eyes):
Zach's reaction here varies a lot based on the C.H.E.A.T.S. stats (the first is with lower Awkwardness, where his improved insight makes Zach realize what's about to happen as those hints from Keisuke that used to fly over his head have all landed and the second is Zach just not being angry enough to think about how he's going to kill Keisuke for saying that if Control is lower):
My current favorite re:Dreamer lore is that Zach isn't the character interested in fucking Zach's mom.
This entire first day, up to Zach going into Keisuke's dorm room, has been polished, but Britney also has some new writing of Zach taking a shower and getting a haircut because he’s being introduced to Britney’s pastor and she wants the proof of her “boyfriend” in the flesh to someone who will tell her parents that's she's not a lesbian (plus, she’s trying to ask the pastor for use of the church property because she wants to hold a theater department cooking fundraiser on it next week and figures acting like a good Christian girl in front of him will help her case):
I can't show some of this writing as it's Zach being topless, but it's pretty neat.
Now, back to Keisuke. Did you know I’ve had almost his entire route outlined from the start of writing? I joke about how I think on my feet for everything, but I have a game plan with Keisuke and I’ve stuck to it.
Anyways, here’s that plan.
Like Newman's Own Sockarooni, this is close to "the whole shebang" for the Keisuke route and no, I totally didn't do it just because I needed a tall image to put into this Patreon post to let you people realize that there are significant spoilers below this image and that you should close this page unless you want to be spoiled.
Also, if you discuss this outline anywhere, use spoiler tags or I'm going to bop you on the nose really, really hard.
Last Warning: almost all of these are story spoilers (most of which are major), so don't read any further if you want to avoid those.
As a necessary tangent, I’m of the opinion that the “canon” Zach is at least “cis by default” regardless of the “therapy” answer with Ai on Day 1 or the Trans stat. A truly cis man’s life in Zoey’s shoes would functionally be over, and the fact that Zach has dealt with it well enough to accept being called Zoey is a testament to how malleable their gender identity is. The bad end of Zach deleting the game functionally destroys Zach’s life, but my justification for this is that it is a much different experience to be fully turned into a woman with no idea of how it happened and with no way to ease into the consequences than to know how it happened, have a way to buffer most of the consequences, a support network to deal with the consequences as they arise, and to have a hope of planning on turning back.
TO FURTHER DETAIL
- WEIGHTLIFTING IS NOT GOING WELL, SO THEY SWITCH TO SWIMMING, WITH ZACH REALIZING THAT SWIMMING IS AN EXERCISE HE CAN EASILY DO WITH HIS NEW BODY BEFORE THEY HAVE SWIMMING POOL SEX
- (ON KEISUKE’S SUGGESTION) ZACH STARTS HANGING OUT WITH THE FEMALE FRIEND GROUP MADE AT THE PARTY A BIT WHENEVER KEISUKE IS TRAVELING FOR SWIM MEETS
- THE HALLOWEEN PARTY WITH THE THREE TRANSFORMATIVE COSTUMES (VAMPIRE COUNTESS, FEMALE WOLF GIRL, AND PLAYBOY BUNNY, ALL LARGELY AS ALREADY OUTLINED)
- A TEMPORARY TRANSFORMATION INTO A DITZY BLONDE WHO IS A BORDERLINE BIMBO OR AN EXTREMELY TIMID CAT GIRL BEFORE EARLY NOVEMBER MIDTERMS, CAUSING ZACH TO BOMB THEM
- THANKSGIVING BREAK (LARGELY AS ALREADY OUTLINED, BUT WITH THE FOCUS BEING ON HOW ZACH IS WEIRED OUT BY HIS MOM ACCEPTING HIM AS A WOMAN TO THE POINT OF ALMOST BEING EAGER TO PUSH HIM INTO ACCEPTING HIMSELF AS ONE, ZACH WORRYING ABOUT HOW THIS RECONTEXTUALIZES HIS LIFE AT HOME, AND HIS MOM BEING WEIRDLY NICE TO KEISUKE AS SHE THINKS HE’S HIS BOYFRIEND)
- RETURNING TO COLLEGE, ZACH FEELING LONELY IN A WEIRD WAY HE CAN’T PUT HIS FINGER ON WHEN HE CAN’T BE AROUND KEISUKE
Still, he isn’t sure what he’s feeling until his Jantzen Beach Amusement Park “date” on Saturday, December 3rd, 2022. It starts out as just an early birthday present to Zach with two best friends on an outing, but he starts to realize that it must look just like a date to everyone watching because he’s dressed up in a cute outfit and doing everything with Keisuke like they’re a couple. Depending on the level of the Trans stat (or the Keisuke Devotion flag), Zach realizes he doesn’t hate the idea of being on a date with Keisuke as much as he thought he would (even though it totally isn’t a date), he is actually okay with the idea of being on a date with Keisuke (even though it totally isn’t a date), or he is even starting to like the thought of it being a date (even though it totally isn’t a date), possibly to the point of “acting up” his “role” as the girlfriend.
Keisuke’s role in this new phase in their relationship has generally been taking Zach out of his comfort zone while providing an anchor to fall back on should he need it, so Keisuke drags him onto a roller coaster. Zach has gotten motion sickness from roller coasters, even kiddy coasters, all his life, but while he gets scared out of his mind while on the ride and clings to the car, the lap bars, and even Keisuke for dear life, he doesn’t get sick for once. Zach’s heart is still racing after the ride and he needs a few moments to catch his bearings, but he looks over at Keisuke and his breath unexpectedly hitches in his throat. Zach argues to himself that what he felt while grabbing Keisuke’s arm (his heart pounding, his chest aching) and what he’s feeling now is just a version of the suspension bridge effect, but it didn’t quite go away after the ride ended. Zach is definitely just a tiny bit clingier with Keisuke for the rest of the day.
Afterwards, to get revenge, Zach drags Keisuke to a haunted house because he knows how scared Keisuke gets of supernatural frights. Zach is the type of guy who could play a horror game and not bat an eye (except while rolling them because the jump scares were so lame), but his heart definitely gets pounding in that haunted house from the way Keisuke keeps giving him full body hugs when he gets frightened, and Zach he can’t explain what he’s feeling away with the suspension bridge effect this time.
Zach gets a little more awkward for the rest of the day but is still mostly “himself.” One thing that does change is that he deliberately tries to keep his distance from Keisuke, so they go to the carnival game section and split up. Zach sees a prize at the bucket toss that catches his eye: a giant bunny stuffed animal (to Zach’s extreme embarrassment, bunnies are his favorite animal). He instantly drops 2,000 yen on a bucket of balls and loses all of them, all while getting upset at how he’s “throwing like a girl.”
Zach is about to drop even more money on a second bucket of balls when Keisuke returns, sees Zach struggling, and then, without asking Zach, spends a few yen getting the smallest bucket of balls for sale and wins the grand prize in one toss. Keisuke asks him what he was trying to win, and he lies and says the gorilla (the animal he told Keisuke was his favorite) before realizing that he should just be honest and tell him he actually wants the bunny. As Keisuke hands it to him, he says he’s happy Zach’s finally being honest with himself and jokes that Zach should think of him when he hugs it. Zach gets really pouty and upset at Keisuke for this and slaps on his chest in a cute fit rage, but that just makes Zach feel weirder, so he quickly stops.
Anyways, this bunny is about 4 feet tall, and Zach and Keisuke don’t really have a way to carry it well. It’s late in the afternoon and they’ve already hit all the attractions they want, so they contemplate calling it a day, but Zach thinks quickly and fashions a harness out of scrap packaging strings for Keisuke to lug the bunny around like a backpack. As they wander around, Zach sees a vintage Ferris wheel, nerds out to himself about how it’s a cool feat of vintage engineering, and asks (or with Keisuke_devotion, demands) to go on it with Keisuke. The car capacity is quite small it’s an antique attraction, but Zach doesn’t want to let the newly-named “Backpack Bunny” or “Rucksack Rabbit” out of his sight and asks the attendant if they can drag it on with them (the cuter “Backpack Bunny” option happens with a higher-than-average Trans stat). The booth is so tight that the stuffed animal has to be in the middle, but as they ride the car up together, Zach and Keisuke start talking.
Mirroring the October 7th scene of Zach thanking Keisuke for helping him, Zach tries to thank Keisuke for the gift with the tickets, and the stuffed animal, and tells him about how fantastic today has been. But then Zach tries to pivot into generally thanking Keisuke for... well, everything he’s ever done for him, but especially the last few weeks. Keisuke isn’t having any of it and reminds Zach that “he doesn’t help girls because he wants to be thanked,” which stops the conversation dead in its tracks as Zach realizes that Keisuke is fully viewing Zach as one of his “damsels in distress” (or so Zach thinks).
Zach is upset about this because he knows Keisuke inevitably ends up dating the girl he has just rescued (with keisuke_devotion, Zach reminds himself that Keisuke’s attempts at true romance are usually so catastrophic that his relationships end in a bitter breakup). Zach decides he can never let himself be fully “rescued” by Keisuke, either to keep him at arm’s length or to not escalate their relationship to actual romance... or maybe he’s overthinking it? After all, the comment was pretty innocuous, so maybe Keisuke doesn’t think about Zach the same way Zach thinks about him?
The stray thought shatters Zach. His nonstop inner monologue, the most honest part of himself, just told him that he liked Keisuke as more than a friend. Even with keisuke_devotion, this upsets Zach because he wasn’t expecting the “act” he was putting on for Keisuke to actually bloom into something on his end. Zach is trying his hardest to deny what he feels for Keisuke with rational thoughts, but he can’t. He really can’t, and Zach starts to just cry a little bit at what this revelation means for him and knowing that it’s going to change everything about how he interacts with Keisuke. As Zach does his best to keep the noise of his sobs down, he is so, so glad that there’s a giant stuffed animal between Keisuke and him so that Keisuke doesn’t see Zach crying and feel forced to save Zach from himself.
Zach wipes his tears on the stuffed animal before they disembark the Ferris wheel, and Zach explains to Keisuke that his eyes are redder than usual because the light of the sun hit his eyes in a bad way when asked about it.
In short, Zach is a flustered mess for the rest of the day. He’s fidgety, he’s nervous, and he’s trying his best to not let Keisuke see that. A short bus ride later, Keisuke drops Zach off at Zach’s dorm (along with the stuffed animal). Zach really needs to be alone with his thoughts right now and sort out the storm in his heart, but when Keisuke briefly propositions sex (as a concerned “You could use the re:Dreamer points.” and not as a romantic “Hey, let’s make this day end on a high note.”), Zach literally slams the door in his best friend’s face.
Zach’s heart is still pounding long after Keisuke leaves, and he does his best to calm himself down by going to bed early. As Zach climbs into bed (naked, of course), he cuddles with the soft and fluffy prize Keisuke won him. As he hugs it, he thinks of Keisuke and how much he wants him and hates that he couldn’t let himself be honest to Keisuke about it. Zach wanted to have sex with Keisuke so badly when he brought it up earlier, but their “sex with benefits” relationship seems so wrong to Zach now that he knows he feels this way.
Zach is actually a hopeless romantic, and while he realizes he’s had a crush on Britney for most of high school in her route, Zach is devastated by how intense his feelings for Keisuke are. There’s also an inner struggle and anxiety from the fact that Zach’s realizing he’s not sure can let himself change back because he has to choose between being a guy again and dialing back his relationship with Keisuke. Zach’s more vulnerable and confused than he’s ever been in him life and he just cries into the stuffed animal and hugs it even more tightly as he comes to grips with how painful it is to be in love like this, not knowing if it can be returned or if Keisuke could ever feel for Zach like that.
As Zach goes to sleep, he realizes how scared he is of being rejected and tells himself he should never bring it up with Keisuke. Falling in love with his best friend like this is already putting a major strain on Zach’s heart, but a rejection from Keisuke would break it.
A few days after Zach’s date with Keisuke (I’m leaning towards December 10, 2022, which is a Saturday), he bumps into Britney in his dorm building. Literally, he was so spaced out worrying about how he feels about Keisuke that he walked into her back in the cafeteria line.
After her shock wears off, she asks Zach if he’s lost weight, and Zach sighs, clenching his throat to slightly deepen his voice before saying he’s actually gained a few pounds but that it all went to his thighs (internally adding, “And my chest.”) Britney is really happy to see Zach (who hasn’t let on that he’s known Britney has been living in his dorm building since almost the start of the semester). She asks him to sit down with her to eat together and catch up. Zach, happy for the convenient distraction, agrees.
Britney’s first question is, of course, how Zach’s sabbatical went. He gives the short version of it, although he mostly focuses on Italy and Rome because he really liked that part of the trip and figures Britney would want to hear about it. Zach brings up the postcard he sent from Vatican City, but Britney tells him she never got it.
Once the sabbatical recount is done, Britney talks a bit about senior year of high school and what she’s been up to since in college (mentioning the family issues but glossing over the details, her theater major, the trouble with the fall production, and her surprise casting in a lead role). Britney then pivots to Zach asking what he’s been up to in college.
Zach simply says “studying,” but Britney pushes him on the issue by saying that his life can’t be that boring. The last 2 months have been anything but “boring” for Zach, but he can’t talk about any of the truly interesting parts. Sighing, Britney says that Zach’s going to regret sticking his nose in the books so much when he looks back on college, a unique time in a person’s life where they learn about who they are, reinvent themselves, make new friends, and possibly even meet someone romantically.
Suddenly, Zach realizes Britney is the best person he knows to ask about romantic advice for a woman (hilariously not true as Britney can barely even comprehend what it feels to have attraction for a man, let alone a jock like Keisuke). Without really knowing where he’s going with it, he blurts out that there’s at least one interesting thing that’s happened in his life recently... he found a long-lost cousin. Her name’s Zoey.
Britney is obviously intrigued by this soap opera twist and asks Zach for more details before he can bring up the part he wanted to (her having feelings for Keisuke), and he has to invent a backstory for her on the spot. Where is she from? (Seattle, technically, but she was moving around a lot as her dad was in the military). How did your family find her? (She found us because her dad, her only parent, passed away recently). Is she living at your house then? (No, she’s a LCU freshman, undecided major). Can I see a photo of her?
Zach pulls out his phone and shows Britney a selfie he took a few weeks ago for Keisuke. Britney just low whistles and sheepishly asks if Zoey is single. Zach is confused about why she’s asking that, but Britney quickly backpedals and says to forget it (she’s still keeping her sexuality a secret, but that Zoey selfie was good enough that she couldn’t help but let that slip).
Zach, seeing his segue, pivots into saying, “Well...” before explaining that he knows Zoey’s been going through a lot and that he set her up with the single best person he knows for helping women: Keisuke. Zach has brought up his chivalrous best friend to Britney a number of times and she largely gets the implication, but Zach then starts muddying the waters a bit by trying to mesh as much as “Zoey’s” fictional backstory with the real problem: her feelings for Keisuke.
Zoey, in short, is very... tomboyish, as she was moved around from IJA (Imperial Japanese Army) base to base with her dad. She’s not comfortable expressing her femininity, even going so far as to cross-dress as a man when she can get away with it. Britney takes a sharp look at Zach after he says this, suspecting that there’s more to his slimmer figure than he’s letting on, but quickly dismissing the notion as insane because the person in front of her is clearly Zach and knew Britney, so it’s not like they’re this “cousin” Zach mentioned in disguise.
Zach continues. Zoey has started to accept more of what her body is and what being a woman is, but she’s still very much outside of her comfort zone. Her guide out of that comfort zone has been Keisuke, and he’s been wonderful throughout the entire experience. The problem now is that Zoey has realized she’s falling in love with Keisuke, or perhaps more accurately, that she’s fallen in love with Keisuke.
Zach explains part of how this happened and why this is an issue: Zoey has no idea if Keisuke feels the same way about her, because he’s only been in this as a personal favor to Zach. Britney doesn’t get why this would be an issue, but Zach accidentally lets a bit more of the truth slip out. Zoey... might not view herself as a woman, and she’s never been interested in guys before Keisuke.
Unfortunately for keeping his story straight, this was maybe the worst thing Zach could have said to a fervent LGBT ally and lesbian like Britney. She’s frothing at the mouth to meet Zoey and won’t let the matter drop, so Zach scratches his cheek and says he’ll get Zoey to call her later this evening.
With Britney’s LGBT lust satisfied for now with that promise, Zach continues the story. Thanks to Keisuke, Zoey has been shown this wonderful but frightening side to herself she’s never explored before, but she’s worried that she’s not the type of girl Keisuke would like, that she looks too similar to Zach and that’s be weird for him to be into a girl with the same face as her cousin (Keisuke’s best friend), and she fears that confessing to Keisuke would be taking advantage of his kindness and overstepping her bounds. A rejection would mean an end to their special relationship and end to her experiment with being more feminine, while accepting her feelings might be ever worse because Zoey is so far outside of her comfort zone with being a woman as much as she is that she’d have to cling to Keisuke like a drowning person would cling to a life ring to keep her head above the water, which isn’t fair to Keisuke.
Zach almost lets it slip that he’s talking about himself during all of this when he says, “I just want Keisuke to be happy and he deserves a ‘real’ girl more than Zoey,” but is thankfully only chided by Britney for being insensitive.
While keeping it vague, Zach says that Zoey is on the cusp of having to make a decision about what she’s going to do with her feelings for Keisuke soon because she’s, uh... considering moving away to go to college somewhere else. With that in mind, it’d probably be for the best if Zoey kept her feelings for Keisuke hidden, right?
Britney listens to this all and offers some pretty simple advice for Zach to relay to Zoey before she makes her final decision: she needs to go on a date with Keisuke, but as the one taking charge of the day for once.
Zach is flabbergasted by this answer but curious about what she means, so he asks her to clarify.
Britney accurately surmises that Zoey’s problem is guilt (a higher Awkwardness stat makes Britney make some lame joke about how she knows what that’s like because she’s Catholic, and a max Awkwardness stat also uses the more exact “compunction” for the problem). Up until now, Zoey has placed herself on the receiving end of Keisuke’s aide and she feels like she owes him for that.
Zach can’t deny this, and Britney continues by assuming that the decision isn’t just about confessing to Keisuke but accepting or rejecting herself as a woman because those problems are linked. Again, Zach says this is probably accurate.
Britney hesitates at the next part because Zoey could be argued as being FtM and interest in de-transitioning from the way Zach phrased her problem (a process that Britney doesn’t want to be involved in), but Zach implores her to continue as this was exactly the advice he was looking for.
Simply, Britney asks Zach if he knows what type of woman Keisuke likes. Zach proceeds to list off some traits he’s seen from Keisuke’s past girlfriends: demure, unassertive, humble, selfless, and feminine. Britney laughs and says Keisuke’s probably looking for a girl with the exact opposite of those traits. From Zach’s stories about his best friend, Britney knows that Keisuke’s relationships with those women have gone down in flames and suggests some of the exact opposite traits for the type of woman that Keisuke is likely looking for: long-winded, passionate, arrogant, needy, and tomboyish. Britney then frankly asks Zach if Zoey could fit the bill for that. A little surprised, Zach says, yes, Zoey fits a lot of those traits (or at least, Zach does, but the dividing lines on his self-identity he has so neatly been compartmentalizing until that amusement park trip have started to blur).
Britney pats herself on the back so hard that her arm dislocates... Just kidding. She is a bit smug about how much she’s cutting to the heart of the matter here though, and she then explains why one big date planned by Zoey is a good idea: this time, Keisuke is going to thank Zoey for setting up an awesome day, meaning that they’re even, meaning that they’re equal and that nobody feels like they owe anyone anything.
Zach says that this would have to be one fucking incredible date to balance that scale, which is why Britney suggests to Zach that he should help her plan the date because he’s Keisuke’s best friend and knows his likes and dislikes better than anyone... at least with activities. She further suggests focusing on activities that will highlight those personality traits that Keisuke is probably looking for in a woman, and also, while they need to be things that both like, the focus should be prioritizing Zoey’s enjoyment, not Keisuke’s. Zach says he’ll do that later, but right away, he can think of a few good ideas (a batting cage, a museum about some subject he would be more interested in than Keisuke would, an arcade with games where Zach can compete with Keisuke on an equal or higher level <I promise, it won’t be interactive>, dinner at a place with food Zach loves, and so on).
For her part, Britney is going to create an incredible look for Zoey for the day: outfit, makeup, accessories... the whole shebang. Britney is confused why Zach is visibly terrified of the thought of Britney dolling Zoey up, but he’s seen how that’s gone for him in the past.
Moving on, Zach has one question: why Britney is helping him... sorry, his cousin, so much after not seeing him for... actually, Britney’s never met Zoey.
Besides the fun for Britney doing something like this that will alleviate her boredom (seriously, the theater club is a disorganized mess in every route but Britney’s, giving her a massive amount of free time), Britney says giving Zoey’s love the best possible chance of success is the right thing to do. “Love is never wrong, but it has consequences.” Zach asks how she knows that Zoey is in love with Keisuke, and Britney stares at Zach like he’s an idiot. “Are you joking?! It’s so obvious that she’s head over heels for the guy!” Britney, still not realizing that Zach wasn’t simply telling Zoey’s story secondhand, yells at him for being so oblivious about how women feel that he couldn’t even recognize when a girl was this much in love with someone. She then makes fun of him for being such a clueless virgin (not knowing how much Zach has been scoring recently), saying, “If love were a rattlesnake, Zach, you would need to get close enough for it to bite you before you’d notice it!”
Still, despite everything she just said, Britney is worried that this is interfering too much, and she has some vague lament about what could be pushing a heteronormative view of romance onto a person who is probably struggling with their gender identity in a bad way right now. Zach stops Britney right there, thanking her for helping him... help his cousin. In the most self-deprecating way possible, Zach describes “Zoey” as a coward who wouldn’t have done anything without Britney’s help.
The precise wording of this trips Britney up. But before she can analyze why, Zach once again thanks Britney and says he’ll tell Zoey to call Britney later tonight before running off.
Back in Zach’s dorm room, Zach’s heart is racing, but he’s smiling and downright giddy. Sure, he’s scared as fuck of the possibility of being rejected by Keisuke, but he’s excited that he’s no longer talking himself out of confessing to him. Britney, in her usual way, cut through the bullshit to get to the heart of the matter that Zach had overcomplicated.
After confirming with Ai that she’s able to give “Zoey” a separate phone number (Zach hasn’t learned in this route that Britney got a new phone as a high school graduation present, meaning that the call would be anonymous and that this is an unnecessary precaution), “Zoey” calls Britney.
Britney picks up nearly instantly, and the two “introduce” themselves to each other. Slightly raising her voice, Zoey says that Zach told her the plan Britney suggested. This is suspicious as fuck as Zach would not have had more than 10 minutes to do this, but Britney shrugs off the feeling and gets the firsthand account of the situation from Zoey herself.
It’s almost exactly the same story Zach told Britney, but telling it from the perspective of Zoey lets the details be more accurate; more specifically, Zoey is able to describe the emotions she feels for Keisuke.
This introductory call is mostly for Britney to confirm things she already learned: Zoey is hopelessly in love with Keisuke (based on the way she gushes about him when Britney asks Zoey what she likes about him), her gender is “complicated” (based on the way she acts hesitant towards endorsing any outfit suggestion Britney mentions that’s too feminine and had no idea what basic makeup procedures were), and that Zach and Zoey are working together in flawless tandem to hide something from her.
In fact, everything about Zoey and Zach gives Britney the vibes of someone struggling to keep a big secret, but she’s going to find out what that is when they meet in-person before the date with Keisuke so Britney can primp her up.
Britney suggests the obvious date for the, well, date, as the 24th (Christmas Eve, a Saturday two weeks from now). Zoey agrees but is told to text Britney her measurements at least a week beforehand.
So, the day of the date arrives. All the planning has been done on Zach’s end for a full, memorable day in downtown Portland (south of the LCU campus): he’s bought tickets to the Portland Art Museum for the morning, there’s a lunch reservation for noon at a great Italian restaurant Rich’s family took Zach’s family to once, they’ll digest their food walking through the Oregon Zoo and the adjacent world-famous Portland Japanese Gardens, there’s a booked spot for a batting cage for the late afternoon, they’ll get sushi from a downtown food stall suggested by his mom, then they’ll spend the evening ice skating at Doheny Center’s open-air ice rink. Zach has never been ice skating before, but he figures it’ll be a great romantic activity that’ll serve as the perfect prelude to Zoey’s confession. Zach has done all the prep work he can (significantly more than ever went into his sabbatical); now, it’s up to Zoey (and Britney) to make the dream date work.
Zoey shows up at Britney’s dorm room at 8:00 AM. Britney has been slaving over the sewing machine all week, but she’s finally done with the outfit(s): 1: a very tomboyish one, and 2: a rather girly one (but with a hint of coolness).
Sources: one, official art, three
Right as she walks into the room, Britney’s impossible suspicions are proven correct because holy fuck, that’s just Zach with long hair, tits, and thick hips. The jig is fully up, but Britney is respectful enough of LGBT identity issues that she doesn’t stop whatever this... charade is.
Britney explains the layering to Zoey, tests how it looks on her (and gives the option to try on the other outfit, before one has to be chosen), and does Zoey’s makeup since Britney has come to the conclusion that Zoey has no idea how to apply it before explaining how to touch it up.
Now, the next bit is a choice with higher Awkwardness, but it otherwise defaults to 2:
1. Zoey is on a tight schedule today, but she can’t let that insult from two week ago about how Zach is blind to love be ignored. Zoey asks Britney (in a roundabout way) what she thinks of Zach, trying to get the slightest bit of an insinuation of romance from her.
At this point, Britney has had fucking enough of being lied to and Zach/Zoey using this dual role to their advantage, and she gets all AngryTexan on Zach/Zoey and says, “I’d like him a lot more if he was honest to me about who he was, especially when I’m spending my Christmas Eve away from my family and doing him a massive favor.”
Zoey tries to play this off with an awkward “H-Haha, what do you mean?” ploy that doesn’t fool anyone. Zach drops the façade and sighs. “How did you figure it out?”
Britney scoffs, still upset. “Besides you having terrible OPSEC and letting way too many clues slip when you talked about yourself? Those guy clothes didn’t work as well as you thought they did.”
<As an aside, Zach’s disguise holds up a lot less well with people who know him from before he turned into a girl if he reacquainted himself with them after the transformation and then appears around them as Zoey... except in Britney’s route, because that girl put work into making the disguise much better.>
Britney asks... Z the fuck is going on. “Was that trip to an overseas SRS doctor?”
Z says it wasn’t.
“Does Keisuke know who you are?”
Z nods their head.
“Then why couldn’t I?!”
Z reminds Britney how tight the schedule is and how important this is to them. They have no way to explain this today, but they promise to explain everything to Britney three and a half months from now. Britney is still fucking pissed at Z for being used like this and has half a mind to never talk to them again, but she’s intensely curious about the answer and knows that there was one thing Z wasn’t lying about: they’re desperate for this date to go well.
Sighing and rolling her eyes, Britney tells Z to get the fuck out of her room. Right before the door slams shut, Britney says, “Good luck.”
After the door slams shut, Britney groans. “I guess some things about a person can never change.”
2. If Zoey doesn’t play with fire by acting like they’re a master spy here, she thanks Britney by doing a deep, formal bow. Zach actually hates almost all of the Japanese social customs about politeness, so this speaks volumes about the depth of Zoey’s gratitude that she does this.
In fact, Zoey is about to burst into tears with how overwhelmed and nervous she is, but Britney calms her down and reminds her that she’s going to mess up her makeup if she cries now.
As Zoey walks out the door, Britney says, “Good luck!”
As the door slams shut, Britney does her smug grin to herself. “I always knew she was like that.” (She didn’t, but hindsight is 20/20).
So, the date gets fully underway with Zoey showing up at the Portland Art Museum right when it opens at 10:00 AM. Keisuke is already waiting for her. He’s dressed nicely and his hair actually combed for once in his life, but Zoey gets upset about him changing up his look too much and instantly tosses his hair to its usually shaggy and slightly spiky style.
The two walk into the art museum. Keisuke wants to check out the American galleries, but Zoey first drags him to the temporary exhibit Forces of Nature: Ecology in Japanese Prints.
As this is a temporary exhibit on Portland Art Museum’s website and liable to be removed, I’ll post the text here:
What is the relationship of humans to their environment? Japanese artists have considered this question in myriad ways, influenced as deeply by the tempestuous natural forces shaping life in this Pacific Rim island archipelago as by long-standing traditions of natural imagery in Japanese art, literature, and culture. The human connection to the natural world has taken on new meanings in the wake of March 11, 2011, when the Great East Japan Earthquake and tsunami, followed by the Fukushima nuclear disaster, struck the northeast coast of Japan. This exhibition explores artistic responses to the environmental forces–some benign, some terrifying–that regulate life on this planet. The works featured here consider the ecological relationship between humans and our environment, encompassing mundane moments of daily life, meditative abstractions, and dystopian visions of the future.
Environmentalism is the one political issue Zoey actually cares about and she’s got stars in here eyes as she goes from piece to piece (sort of like Yor Briar in SPY x FAMILY got when the Forgers went to an art gallery and she saw a painting of a guillotine).
Source: Spy x Family
Keisuke doesn’t really get it, but he enjoys watching her get so excited and passionate about a subject.
They do the American art gallery next, but Zoey isn’t nearly as excited about this one and is glad when they finish it to go to the last exhibit she wants to see: the Native American art.
Zoey really enjoyed the part of her sabbatical around the Southwest United States and tribal lands in California, and she has fun acting like a tour guide for Keisuke, pointing to things, reading the descriptions, expanding upon them, and bringing up her experiences when relevant (or not; you know how neurodivergent people get).
Finished with the museum (and having spent just a little too long in it), they skedaddle to their noon lunch reservations at Castoro Osteria, a fairly upscale Italian restaurant loosely based on the real Mucca Osteria.
Zoey, despite what Zach might say in the existing Mom route, adores Italian food. As they sit down, Keisuke has some line about how he likes it too because it’s high in carbohydrates and nutrients good for an athletic lifestyle, but Zoey gets upset and says that he’ll take all the romance out of the meal talking about it like that. She blushes a bit at this, but not wanting to let the cat out of the bag quite yet, she goes into a diversionary rant about Italian food culture, how long the tradition goes back, her time in Italy, and so on.
Now the head chef hears this girl gushing about his culture and takes a personal interest in waiting their table. He’s the nicest 50-year-old Italian man they’ve ever met, calling Zoey “darling” and just acting like a jovial grandpa to both of them, but also “upselling” them into getting more expensive menu options. He takes delight in Zoey gushing about her time in Italy as he gets them two wineglasses and a bottle of the expensive house red (a zinfandel blend). Surprising Zoey, Keisuke perfectly does the gentlemanly “guy taste a small bit of the red wine being poured, deciding whether or not it’s good after a taste test, then asking for the rest to be poured.” Zoey, not wanting to be upstaged, asks to do the whole thing too, including the snobby “legs on the glass” and smell test parts. She, of course, finds the expensive wine excellent, and she continues to talk about Italy as she takes sips and the two decide what to order.
The chef suggests she get the spaghetti alla norma (spaghetti with eggplant and tomatoes), and a little too drunk from the wine a little too quickly, goes into a rant about how she’s surprised the restaurant is offering a traditionally Sicilian dish, which delights the chef. “Your girlfriend really knows her stuff, brother! Don’t let this one get away from you!”
Zoey blushes furiously about this (not from the wine, but that has been reddening her face too) but Keisuke seems unperturbed by it as he says he’ll get the tagliatelle al cinghiale (tagliatelle with wild boar). The chef praises his choice, but Zoey rolls her eyes and calls him a meathead for it (but she’s smiling a lot as she does so).
The chef takes their menus and says he’ll be out with their food shortly. Zoey is uh... a little more drunk at this point in the date than she should be (as much as she tries to deny it, she’s inherited her mom’s weakness to alcohol, particularly red wine). She can’t get the chef’s comment towards Keisuke about her out of her head, but she tries to distract herself by asking Keisuke how he knew the wine etiquette so well. Keisuke, who hasn’t been drinking any of his wine past the first sip, explains the whole “alcoholic dad” thing and how his dad taught him about all the intricacies of alcohol. He still remembers those lessons, even if he never touches the stuff outside of light beer at parties. Zoey can’t understand this as she is having a great time with her alcohol (seriously, she’s an adorable and happy little drunk) and asks him why, and Keisuke says that he doesn’t want to be like his dad that way.
Zoey acts all surprised and says no, Keisuke would make a great dad... before she realizes that she’s already thinking of herself as the wife... which makes her realize she’s thinking of herself as being like her mom acts towards her dad... which is actually pretty accurate, as they’re both—
Zoey shakes her head and asks Keisuke for his wine glass since he’s not going to have it, but Keisuke thinks she’s had a little too much to drink and says no. She gets really pouty about this and asks him to fork it over, but before she can get to the point of grabbing for it, the chef returns with their food.
Zoey is eager to start eating, and holy shit, it tastes sooo good. While she tries to and usually succeeds at eating politely, she eats like a bit of a slob as part of her natural way of consuming food (at her worst, she’s close to Yukine Chris from Symphogear when she ate the spaghetti like a feral goblin).
Source: Senki Zesshou Symphogear G
She isn’t able to restrain herself from starting to do that here, but before it gets too bad, Keisuke stops her, wipes her face off with her napkin (trying not to mar her makeup), and puts it on her collar like a bib. After that embarrassing act, she slows down and nibbles on her food.
The chef tries to get Zoey and Keisuke to get some desert or after-meal coffee, but Zoey declines, explaining the packed schedule for the day and how they have to get a move on to get everything done.
When the check comes, Zoey’s jaw drops. It’s over 10,000 yen (100 USD; yes, I somewhat lazily say that 100 yen equals a dollar in re:Dreamer’s setting). She had carefully budgeted her funds for the date, even having to go so far as to ask her mom for 20,000 yen from the remainder of the student loan she was forced to surrender to upon returning home. But with the expensive wine and more expensive menu options, she can’t afford to pay this tab.
Not even getting a chance to express her anxiety about how she’s going to pay for this, Keisuke takes the check and gives his credit card. This resolves the issue, but Zoey is still upset about it as she was treating this date (on Britney’s advice) as a way to “clear” the debts with Keisuke so she stops having to feel so guilty about being indebted to him. She asks Keisuke way he had to go ahead and pay for everything, but he just laughs, “What, like I’d make the girl pay?” Zoey tries to insist on paying for at least her half of the meal, but Keisuke refuses. She then asks to just pay the tip (something that isn’t really common in AKR culture), and Keisuke accepts that compromise.
As they leave the restaurant, Zoey has started to sober up a bit from the food in her stomach... but she’s also started to get a bit mopey from how she acted. This was supposed to be the perfect date meant to woo Keisuke, but she’s starting to think that she’s been acting like a selfish brat.
“Sorry for getting a little too drunk during lunch. I was probably a nuisance...” she says as she walks alongside him.
“Nah, it’s fine. You were actually pretty cute back there.”
Zoey almost collapse into a puddle of good from this, but then Keisuke says, “I’ll be sure to reel you back when you get too wild,” which causes her to melt completely because she thinks of how that’ll happen in the future with them as a couple and—
She walks right into a light post. Keisuke sighs, thinking she’s still drunk on alcohol (not on the euphoria of romance). “But take it easy with the alcohol, okay? Girls can’t pound back the drinks like guys can.”
Zoey sheepishly nods her head, but then says, “W-Well, since I’m so drunk right now, hold my hand and keep me close... you know, to prevent me from walking into anything else.”
Keisuke agrees to it without any resistance, and Zoey just can’t get over how much she enjoys holding his hand. She knows firsthand that Keisuke has a grip like a silverback gorilla, but he’s been so gentle with her hand.
They’re actually within walking distance of the Portland Japanese Gardens and Oregon Zoo, but Zoey still has lingering doubts about her degree of control with the date and insists that Keisuke pick first. Keisuke throws it right back at her with “Whatever you want to do first.”
Upset at not realizing Keisuke was going to counter like this, she chooses one.
Like the Britney Day 1 dinner conversation, the events play out slightly differently based on what’s first, but the overall details are very similar.
The Portland Japanese Gardens are already an elegant tourist attraction without Japan having territorial control of Cascadia, but within re:Dreamer’s setting, they are truly a sight to behold. The grounds are meticulously maintained and treated almost like they belong to a royal sultan (not far off, as the Japanese emperor occasionally visits Portland and prefers to stay on a private villa at the gardens and close it for tourists when he’s there). Zoey is not actually too fond of her Japanese heritage and insists she’s “White” whenever it gets brought up. She’s one-quarter Japanese, one-quarter German, and, for lack of a better term, half “Milwaukee White” of blended German immigrant, Polish immigrant, and slight Native American ancestry; however, her heritage has never been important to her. As she walks through the grounds with Keisuke (who has a much simpler half-Japanese, half-Swiss ancestry; as a tangent, he speaks fluent Japanese but rarely uses it), she starts to think that maybe she’s been wrong for ignoring her ancestry (Nazi war criminal great grandpa aside... she’s okay crossing that part out of her family tree). She can picture the scene out of a Japanese fairytale vividly in her head: coming back here in the spring, the cherry blossoms blooming... walking up the aisle to marry Keisuke in a Japanese-style wedding... her long black hair tied back and wearing a traditional kimono... looking like a Japanese princess...
She idly adds on, “Like Kurohime...” to her daydream before she stares far off into the distance, realizing what she’s been daydreaming about.
The Oregon Zoo was something Zach loved going to as a kid, and Zoey likes it just as much. When she gets to the Africa area, she brags that she’s seen most of these animals in the wild in Africa, including her favorite animal, gorillas. Keisuke corrects her with “Aren’t bunnies your favorite animal?” and Zoey gets extremely tsundere about it, saying that she never said that she liked bunnies but that she just wanted that bunny/rabbit stuffed animal from the bucket toss game at Jantzen park more than the gorilla one. Keisuke doesn’t let this go and keeps teasing Zoey for liking bunnies, and she eventual admits with extreme embarrassment that yes, they are her favorite animal... but maybe she likes one gorilla more than she likes every bunny (if Zoey went on the Portland Japanese Garden dates first, she remembers that a few gorillas have had a cat as a pet). She refuses to elaborate on this point and drags Keisuke to another part of the zoo.
The “strolling” portion of their trip done, they visit a batting cage Zoey booked reservations for. Zoey intends this activity as the romantic prelude to the similar activity at the mall (ice skating) of getting Keisuke to teach her how to do something. Zoey was picturing getting close to Keisuke as he helps her to improve her swing and how to throw better, but that plan goes out the window once Keisuke starts going.
Zoey has been simultaneously downplaying and overstating Keisuke’s skill at sports, particularly baseball, throughout the story, but he is phenomenally talented at it. Zoey begs the staff to let them turn the speed of the pitching machine up beyond the safety limits, and after seeing Keisuke’s performance, they’re inclined to think he can handle it. They start making the machine throw 90 mph (145 kph) pitches at Keisuke, who keeps up. He scoffs when Zoey says how impressed she is with him, saying that it’s not that impressive when the machine doesn’t vary how it pitches.
Realizing Keisuke is starting to get bored, Zoey switches things up and goes back to her initial plan of getting Keisuke to teach her how to swing and throw. They start with the latter.
Keisuke demonstrates the motion by throwing a respectable 81 mph (130 kph) fastball and explains how he did it, but Zoey can’t even remotely replicate it. He concludes that he can’t teach Zoey the right way to pivot her new body to throw a good pitch in the booked time that they have left because he doesn’t know how female physiology affects what she would need to do.
Zoey is a little disheartened to hear this as even the most trans Zoey ever is a bit upset that she pitches like a girl, so she then asks for a lesson in improving her swing. Keisuke agrees, but Zoey doesn’t quite have the motion down and overswings significantly every time. She starts to get frustrated, but Keisuke insists that she’s making visible progress.
Zoey goes like “Oh, yeah?” and (in a way that mirrors Britney’s Tower Topper bet as she got Britney’s specific advice on this tactic) says that she’ll make a bet with him: if she can hit Keisuke’s fastball in 3 pitches, she’ll do a favor for him, but in return, she can ask him for something in return.
Keisuke shrugs but humors her (he’s secretly fired up because he and Zach used to make stupid bets and dares like this all the time as a kid, even with how lopsidedly different their skill sets are).
Keisuke throws his first pitch, and Zoey easily bunts it (the one thing Zach was truly good at with baseball is seeing where the ball is going and knowing how to bunt it). Keisuke gets upset that she didn’t swing, but Zoey gives the smuggest grin ever as she says that the bet specified “hitting” the ball. They get into a short argument, but Keisuke gives in because she actually did satisfy the imprecise wording and it wasn’t like he got hustled by someone hiding their skill or anything. He asks Zoey what she wants, and she looks away, flustered, saying, “I’ll let you know by the end of the day.”
The sun is almost down by this point, but they make a stop by a standing sushi stall in Downtown Portland that was the only piece of advice Zoey’s mom offered when she mentioned she wanted to do a date in Downtown Portland with Keisuke. They reach the stall, but it is packed with couples. Zoey is almost like, “okay, fuck this,” but Keisuke convinces her to stick around for the 20 minutes of waiting they’ll need.
So, their nigiri is finally served to them. It’s just okay, and Zoey doesn’t understand why her mom was so specific about visiting here. They walk away from the stall and wolf down their sushi as they walk (a thing that is actually considered quite rude in Japanese culture, but Zoey doesn’t give a shit and Keisuke doesn’t really know that’s a thing). As they walk, Zoey overhears a couple excitedly chattering to each other as they approach the crowded food stall... about how local folklore says that sushi from this stall, if eaten by a couple on Christmas Eve, is supposed to greatly increase the woman’s fertility for the following year.
Zoey instantly stops chewing, spitting out her food and throwing the rest of her sushi in the closest garbage can (a lower Trans Zoey considers vomiting into it before deciding against it). Keisuke asks what’s wrong, and she says that there was something wrong with hers (a more Awkward Zoey can’t resists making a “there was something fishy about it” pun here). Keisuke says his tastes fine and asks if she wants the rest of his. Zoey says emphatically says no.
Their final stop of the date is Doheny Center (based on Lloyd Center in Portland and similarly named after a Californian oil baron). It requires a short cab ride across the Willamette River, during which time Zoey is nervous out of her mind as she’s vastly overthinking what to say to Keisuke. She doesn’t know how honest she can be with him, or if it’d be appropriate to bring up her interest in gender bender stuff (or more complex gender issues if she’s realized she has them), whether Keisuke would be gay for liking her, if she can maybe still turn back into a guy and be romantically involved with Keisuke, if this is truly what she wants, if Keisuke would be okay with her not being a “real” girl, and what if she decides this is just a crush after all and she gets stuck as a woman for the rest of her life and has nothing gained from it but a broken heart.
Zoey’s head is spinning as they get out of the cab, and it isn’t from motion sickness of the cabbie driving a bit too roughly. Keisuke steadies her as she’s about to tumble, and in that exact moment she gets gripped by him, she realizes that Britney was right: she is head over heels for Keisuke (she’s daydreamed about being his wife more than once today, but she’s an extremely dense motherfucker). Whatever comes after this, no matter what that may be, comes second to her feelings for him.
When they get to the ice rink, it’s packed with couples who had the idea Zoey did. She just chides herself for not realizing that of course an ice rink at a swanky mall would be a popular date spot on Christmas Eve. Oh well, she’ll just have to manage.
Zoey actually has no idea how to ice skate and is about as coordinated as a small toddler as she gets on the ice. More than once, she slips and falls on her ass (being thankful for having such a thick one every time), but Keisuke is there to show her the ropes. He’s dabbled in pretty much every athletic activity a person can do outside of expensive extreme sports, and while not exactly a professional figure skater, he’s quite competent.
Zoey had the stupid idea that she was going to get good enough at ice skating within 10 minutes to skate alongside Keisuke (one of Zach/Zoey’s primary personality traits is vastly overestimating their ability to pick up new skills just because they’re better than most at it), but she has to conclude after 30 minutes that she isn’t making sufficient progress for the fairy tale confession she pictured in her head (stubbornly refusing to give up when they maybe should is another one of Zach/Zoey’s primary personality traits). She tells Keisuke that they’re done and that she wants to find a quiet bench to sit down on (her legs are trembling, and only some of that is from her nerves about confessing).
She and Keisuke sit down on a bench in a quiet spot of the mall atrium. After breathing a sigh of relief that she doesn’t have to stand legs that feel like rubber, she turns to Keisuke with a deathly serious expression. Keisuke first thinks he’s done something wrong and that he’s in trouble because this is the exact expression Zoey gives him when she’s about to go “ice queen” mode and scare the shit out of him, but she doesn’t let her face freeze up into a frost glare at all. Instead, her face softens into the warmest expression she’s ever seen from her as she starts her confession.
“I... think I really love you, Keisuke.”
“I love you too, dude!” (Keisuke is one of those types of people who uses the word “love” a bit too casually, and I personally think that’s weird because I almost purely use it for romance.)
Zoey’s heart wrenches with the “dude” part of that. She briefly thinks this isn’t going to work, but she can’t stop here. She’s done everything possible to set herself up for success today, and she’d never forgive herself for acting like a coward after all that.
“No, I mean...” She still can’t bring herself to clarify what she means.
“Keisuke, what are we?”
Keisuke scratches his head. “Best friends?”
With higher Self-Esteem, Zoey snidely thinks, “How the fuck did Keisuke ever get women to fall in love with him when he’s this dense?” while with lower Self-Esteem, Zoey woefully thinks, “This is hopeless...”
“What if we were more than that?”
She turns to Keisuke, and her face is glowing.
“Keisuke... I’m in love with you.”
Keisuke stares at her, and that almost makes Zoey’s heart break because he hadn’t been expecting that.
Zoey said she wasn’t going to cry during this because she knows how easily a cute girl crying can convince Keisuke to act recklessly, but she can’t stop the tears from starting.
In fact... she can’t stop her mouth either, as she tells him everything.
Zoey serves her heart to Keisuke on a silver platter here. Based on raised flags and C.H.E.A.T.S. stats, this “confession turned confessional” ranges from how she’s always idolized Keisuke for being the epitome of masculinity she could never reach, a part of her actually hating him for that and seething with jealousy, smugly lording her intelligence over him because that was the one thing she could boast about to a guy as talented as Keisuke, feeling guilty about doing that, pushing him away because she was such a garbage best friend yet simultaneously coming up with excuses for him to spend time with her, and feeling like she owes Keisuke for just being around her; with the keisuke_devotion flag, she specifically mentions that she threw herself at Keisuke like a desperate damsel in distress because she thought that’d be the perfect way to repay him for everything.
From there, it gets to the even more important stuff, such as how she had some latent misogyny because of her relationship with her mom, how she never let herself get into a relationship before because of that (she tries to say it’s more than Zach’s complete lack of ability to get bitches), how she didn’t want to get into anything “feminine” to distance herself from her mom, about how before she knew it she had internalized her preferences in women to “Zach, but female” because she didn’t trust anyone else (not even just women), explaining any gender issues she might have (a murky subject for sure based on the way C.H.E.A.T.S. works, but all the cards have to be put on the table here), about how she isn’t (or perhaps is) certain of who she is now, but most importantly, that she’s certain she’s fallen in love with Keisuke.
<As an important aside, I’ve generally been describing the protagonist of re:Dreamer as “Zoey” while on this date, but it would still shown in the name box as “Zach” like usual... until the exact moment where Zach explains the certainty (or lack of certainty) with his gender identity, where it either stays the same, the name disappears and leaves Zach/Zoey’s unique cyan and pink border name box textless, or changes to Zoey.>
Zoey gives vivid emotional details about how much she’s fallen in love with Keisuke here and how she got help to realize her feelings and set up today’s date.
Keisuke has heard a lot of confessions in his life, but he’s never heard one like this. When Zoey is finally out of things to say, she stares at him with a pleading look and says, “Well?”
Keisuke scratches his head. After a few seconds, he speaks, and Zoey’s entire world is balancing on his next words.
“I haven’t thought of it like that before, but you’d make a pretty awesome girlfriend!”
In the cutest way possible, Zoey is disappointed by this. She gets adorably upset that Keisuke didn’t pick up on any of the romance of today. He shrugs and says that he just didn’t see her like that until she said she saw him like that.
Zoey can’t believe it’s that simple. She demands, pretty aggressively, what Keisuke truly thinks of her.
In a way that mirrors Zoey’s “confession turned confessional” from a minute ago, Keisuke starts telling Zoey what he really thinks of her (although still using Zach, as he even though he might have been told Zach isn’t identifying as male before, Zoey never explained that she wants her to call him that name too).
Keisuke say that despite being the smartest person he’s ever met, Zoey’s a complete dumbass.
Zoey give an angry “Hey!” shout here, but Keisuke stops her and continues his rant. He’s been holding stuff back too, and it’s only fair that he stops doing that now.
As he sees it, Zoey can’t take even the slightest bit of criticism without putting her guard up, she goes into every situation assuming she knows more than anyone else involved; has a massive ego that gets bruised at the slightest setback yet thinks so little of herself that she’s willing to let people walk over her even throw herself on the ground for them to walk on; she uses people because she’s so quick to assume that people would use her right back; she’s impulsive; she underthinks the things she needs to think about more; she overthinks the simplest things; she spaces out in conversation; she doesn’t let anyone else get a word in edgewise in conversation; lies to everyone constantly like a fish breathes air (and Keisuke reminds Zoey that she’s not nearly as good at it as she thinks she is); and maybe worst of all, she is so dishonest to everyone, including herself, that it takes a life change as extreme as getting turned into a woman for her to start being honest.
When he’s done, Zoey looks like a corpse with the life sucked out her as she weakly says, “I wasn’t asking you to be that honest.”
Source: Gugure! Kokkuri-san
But Keisuke isn’t done.
He explains that despite all of this, Zoey is incredible. She’s smart across so many subjects to a degree that Keisuke can’t even comprehend; she’s fun to be around; she has a great and incredibly clever sense of humor; she always has something interesting to talk about; she has a unique way of looking at things that make her worth asking for advice; she’s incredibly kind and sympathetic; she’s not afraid to take action by being the only person around willing to stand up and do what’s right; she refuses to give up against hopeless odds; she’s happy to march by the beat of her own drum; she’s extremely passionate about everything she does, and she never half-asses them; she’s adorable (giving several examples of things she does that are adorable); she’s sexy (giving several examples of parts of her body that are sexy); she’s great in bed (giving several examples of how she’s good in bed); and—
With steam coming out of her ears, Zoey shouts, “Stopstopstopstopstop!”
After realizing what how much of a scene she’s making by shouting at the top of her lungs, she, even more weakly than the last time (but looking like a blushing tomato afraid to make eye contact rather than a corpse), says, “I-I wasn’t asking you to be that honest.”
There’s an awkward silence between the two, but Zoey is the first to break it.
“Sooo... are we going out now?” (A more Awkward Zoey clarifies this with “For real?”)
Keisuke smiles, “I guess so.”
Zoey is on fucking cloud nine. She would have preferred something more definitive from Keisuke, but she supposes she got that with his rant about how incredible she is earlier.
“Awesome.” (I need to work on the precise wording Zoey uses here, but the idea is that it is dorky and doesn’t match the strength of the emotions she feels).
“By the way, Keisuke, you still owe me a favor from that thing back in the batting cage.”
“Sure, name it.”
“I want you to give me a kiss, and I want you to mean it.”
The two have a romantic kiss (and then sex when they get back to Keisuke's dorm later).
TO FURTHER DETAIL
- CHANGING THE USE OF THE WISH FROM GOING BACK TO A LIFE OF BEING ZACH TO SHUTTING DOWN RE:DREAMER FOREVER BECAUSE ZOEY KNOWS HOW FUCKED UP THAT GAME IS AND THAT AN AWFUL PERSON COULD EASILY GET A DANGEROUS WISH, WITH AI BEING SURPRISINGLY ON BOARD WITH THE PLAN AFTER ZOEY AND KEISUKE BRING IT UP AS A HYPOTHETICAL QUESTION
- ZOEY TALKING TO HER PARENTS ON CHRISTMAS DAY ABOUT HOW SHE’S PROBABLY NOT CHANGING BACK, HAVING A REALLY PERSONAL CONVERSATION WITH HER DAD ONE-ON-ONE LATER ABOUT HOW HURT SHE STILL IS THAT SHE NEVER REALLY GOT A DAD
- A NEW YEAR’S DAY SHRINE VISIT WITH A KIMONO FOR ZOEY, ZOEY DISCUSSING HOW SHE’S OKAY WITH BEING CALLED “ZOEY” FULL-TIME NOW. KEISUKE IS COOL WITH IT AS LONG AS ZOEY KEEPS BEING HERSELF AND DOESN’T LIE TO HERSELF ABOUT WHO SHE IS
- VALENTINE’S DAY WITH ZOEY HAVING NO IDEA HOW TO MAKE CHOCOLATE. KEISUKE EATS IT ANYWAYS, GIVING HIM THE FIRST STOMACHACHE OF HIS LIFE
- A TEMPORARY DAYLONG TRANSFORMATION INTO A FLIRTATIOUS MILF A FEW DAYS AFTER VALENTINE’S DAY, WHICH KEISUKE SEEMS TO ODDLY ENJOY
- ZOEY BRINGING UP NOTIONS OF GENDER ISSUES WITH HER SMALL FEMALE FRIEND GROUP, FEELING GUILTY FOR BEING AN IMPOSTER. THEY NOT ONLY ACCEPT HER WHEN SHE SAYS THAT’S SHE "PRACTICALLY" INTERSEX BUT THEY MAKE HER THE GROUP MASCOT AND TAKE HER OUT TO KARAOKE AND A GIRL’S DAY OUT ON TOWN
- ZOEY DISCOVERING A STEROIDS SCANDAL ON THE SWIM TEAM BY THE COACH PAYING PLAYERS TO DOPE UP AFTER UNLOCKING KEISUKE’S DORM ROOM SAFE WHILE BORED AND FINDING THE STEROIDS IN THERE
- ZOEY AND KEISUKE GETTING INTO A BIG FIGHT ABOUT IT, WITH KEISUKE SAYING THAT WORKING SO HARD FOR HIS ATHLETIC ACCOMPLISHMENTS ALL HIS LIFE AND THAT HE’S TIRED OF PUTTING SO MUCH WORK IN FOR SO LITTLE PAYOFF SUCKS, BECAUSE UNLIKE ZOEY, HE CAN’T CHEAT HIS WAY INTO A PERFECT BODY WITH A MAGIC PHONE APP
- ZOEY AND KEISUKE “BREAKING UP” FOR LIKE A WEEK, WITH A BAD END OF ZOEY REPORTING THE STEROIDS WITHOUT TELLING KEISUKE AND AVOIDNG THAT BY CONVINCING KEISUKE TO REPORT IT AND PATCHING UP THEIR RELATIONSHIP
- RYOUICHI WASN’T DOPING BUT A LOT OF HIS FRIENDS WERE AND THEY’RE FACING EXPULSION, WHICH LEADS TO RYOUICHI INVESTIGATING WHY AND THE MOST LIKELY PERSON WHO CONVINCED KEISUKE TO GO PUBLIC AND FINDING OUT SOME OF THE DETAILS OF ZOEY NOT ACTUALLY EXISTING AND HER AND ZACH BEING THE SAME PERSON
- RYOUICHI MAKES THE THREAT OF EXPOSING HER LIKE SHE INSTIGATED THE STEROIDS SCANDAL BEING EXPOSED, AND HE’S MORE THAN WILLING TO DO THIS BECAUSE HE ALWAYS KNEW THEY WERE A CRAZY BITCH WHO DIDN’T DESERVE KEISUKE (RYOUICHI IS GAY)
- KEISUKE HEARS THIS AND PUNCHES RYOUICHI. THEY ARE NO LONGER FRIENDS AND KEISUKE SWITCHES HIS SCHOLARSHIP FROM SWIMMING TO BASEBALL (EASILY DONE AS HE MAY BE ON ACADEMIC PROBATION BUT THE SPORTS DEAN IS GRATEFUL FOR LETTING THE SCHOOL SETTLE THE MATTER QUIETLY)
- A SPRING BREAK TRIP TO CALIFORNIA WITH ZOEY WEARING A CUTE BEACH OUTFIT (IT’S SUPER CUTE!)
- ZOEY PATCHING UP THINGS WITH BRITNEY AS BEST AS SHE CAN GIVEN THAT SHE CAN'T TALK ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED TO HER. BRITNEY BEGRUDGINGLY ACCEPTS ZOEY'S APOLOGY FOR USING HER BUT IS GONNA DEMAND THE FULL STORY WHEN ZOEY CAN GIVE IT
- THE PRELUDE TO ZOEY AND KEISUKE ACTUALLY REALIZING THEY’RE GOING TO WIN THE RE:DREAMER SEASON, AND A TALK WITH KEISUKE AGREEING TO USE HIS TO MAKE ZACH’S TRANSITION INTO ZOEY BE QUESTIONED LESS (KEISUKE IS VISCERALLY OFFENDED BY THE THOUGHT OF USING THE WISH TO REWRITE ZACH’S PAST INTO ZOEY’S PAST)
Right before Zoey makes her wish to shut down re:Dreamer, Keisuke uses his to make Ai a real person instead of the agreed-upon legal identity change (and related matters).
Ai was 100% expecting to die with the game, so she just bursts into sobbing and tears of gratitude because she was secretly so scared to die. When she calms down, she has a bit of shock from the sensations of being a human, but she quickly expresses smugness about being 5’6” and taller than Zoey. She’s not as voluptuous, but she’s pretty cute in her own way.
After a short talk, the trio plan what to do next. Zoey understands why Keisuke did this, but she gets a little mad saying, “you can’t just poof a person into existence!” Yes, it’s ambiguous as it either means herself or Ai. Keisuke remarks that’s been what Zoey’s been doing for herself over the past few months, and it’ll probably work out fine.
The first step is getting IDs. Zoey visits Rich with Ai and Keisuke and explains the game without consequences.
Rich is skeptical, but Ai provides strong evidence of the claims. While doing making the IDs, Ai pokes her nose around Rich’s apartment, and sees what are essentially “his books.”
“Zoey, isn’t this guy supposed to be as smart as you?” Ai shouts. “I-I never said that!” Zoey stammers (she totally had at one point, but she doesn’t want to inflate Rich’s ego). Much to Zoey’s chagrin, Keisuke backs Ai up. “Then why is his operation so sloppy?!”
Ai proceeds provides incredibly high level financial advice about how to cook Rich’s books and can’t believe Rich wasn’t doing it already. It goes completely over Keisuke’s head and a little over Zoey’s, but Rich takes a few seconds to process the information and comes to the conclusion that Ai knows his business better than he does.
Rich gets cozy with Ai and asks if she’d like to spend the night with him to talk his business over. “After all, she’s such an intelligent, fascinating young woman.” Zoey’s vaguely seen this schmoozing from Keisuke before and has a good idea that Rich wants to get in Ai’s pants, so she gives Ai a brief glance and she’s like, “yeah, I’ve got this.”
After getting the ID for herself, Zoey and Keisuke leave, but the next morning, Zoey gets a text from Ai that she’s going to be living with Rich for a while. Zoey gives a relieved shrug as that was something she hadn’t figured out yet.
Time skip to next semester when Zoey has basically replaced Zach in every capacity, either through the “clerical error” excuse, Ai hacking things (she’s kept almost all of her skills as a human), Zoey explaining herself as intersex, or Zoey saying she had SRS. Britney is one of the very, very few people who know the real reason Zoey is now a woman, but their relationship isn't quite as friendly as Zoey would like because it kind of bothers Britney how fucking straight Zoey ended up as a girl and Britney still hasn't told Zoey that she's a lesbian or that Zoey is 100% her type.
Zoey is in the engineering dean’s office and being asked why she wants to change her major from mechanical engineering to architectural design. Zoey shrugs and gives a succinct “It’s what I was born to do” story about her parents are both architects and she probably should have been majoring in that from the start, but her reluctance to be like her mom held her back. Now that she’s getting along with her, that reluctance to be her daughter has largely disappeared.
The dean approves, and her second year starts.
Time skip to the middle of her third year at school. Keisuke has let his hair revert to its natural black, and someone just deposited a sum matching Zoey’s outstanding student loan into Keisuke’s checking account... in fact, triple that. Zoey and Keisuke conclude that is has to be Ai, so they call her. She’s been making money with Rich hand over fist and wanted to show her appreciation for her new life. Zoey and Keisuke are kind of upset that she didn’t let them know beforehand, but she just gives a “you would have refused” answer. The money is mostly meant for Keisuke (Ai considers him a great friend and the chief reason why she can live the life she does), but she also wants Zoey to pay off her student loan with it. She spends the rest of the call gushing about Rich and how much she likes him and having sex with him before Zoey ends the call.
Time skip to a few weeks before graduation. Zoey and Keisuke are discussing their future... specifically, their future together. Zoey is on track to graduate with honors, but Keisuke lost a year of academic credits to the fallout of the steroids scandal; this means they are graduating together (a fact that secretly thrills Zoey). Zoey mentions where they want to live after college (Zoey has grown attached to Portland, but she wants something a bit more rural and natural). She asks Keisuke where he wants to live and he gives a pithy “with you” reply as he pulls out a ring and proposes to Zoey on the spot. Zoey just burst into tears of joy and accepts.
Time skip to a few weeks after graduation. Zoey requested Keisuke bleach his hair back to blond again. The engaged couple had just surveyed the site of the house they are planning on building near Gladstone, OR (7.5 miles southeast of Lake Oswego). The location is close to home because Zoey started getting along with her mom really well over the last 3 and half years and she doesn’t want to lose that.
Anyways, the house. Zoey designed the entire thing by herself (she had to fend off her mom’s unsolicited creative input) and used her dad’s connections, Ai’s money, and her architectural skills to get the project off the ground. She’s vaguely toying with the idea of having a career like her dad, but she swore to not live that long-distance life long ago. Besides, Keisuke is bringing in plenty of money with his sports training business of teaching his skills to athletes.
Speaking of money, Ai and Rich moved to New York City after Rich graduated and they’ve been shaking up the financial world together. They’re planning on getting married in the next few weeks in a lavish wedding. If Zoey is going, it’ll only be for the ceremony itself.
After the survey, Zoey and Keisuke return to the place where they first started to drift apart: the canal where they had met Kurohime, watched her die, and buried her.
Keisuke honestly doesn’t remember where the grave is, but Zoey does. The event was a deeply personal one to her, so she kneels at the tiny grave marker she made as a little boy and gives a very solemn prayer about how Kurohime’s death might have driven a wedge between her and Keisuke when they were kids but she’s not going to let anything like that ever happen again.
After she’s done, Keisuke remarks how impressed he is with her. Zoey is just confused, but Keisuke explains. Back on that early August afternoon, Zach was the one who ran to try to save Kurohime from the dog attacking her. Zach was the one who pushed away the dog, risking injury to himself. Zach was the one who comforted Kurohime as she lay there dying. Zach was the one who dug her grave. Zach was the one who gave Kurohime her name after burying her. On that day, Keisuke hated how much of a coward he was and that he couldn’t do anything except stand there. That, more than anything else, is why he was ashamed to really hang out with Zach during middle school and drifted apart from him.
He gets melancholy and says, “You were always the one who took charge of things, not me.”
Zoey smiles and flicks him on the forehead (she’s gotten a bit physical with her teasing since accepting herself as a woman, a sign that a little bit of her mom’s aggressive physical body language is in her). “I wouldn’t have agreed to marry you if I didn’t think you could keep up.”
As they get up to leave, they hear a meow. A juvenile black cat comes crawling out of a bush nearby.
Keisuke immediately goes, “Oh my God, Kurohime really did get reincarnated.” Zoey just immediately smacks him on the back of the head. (She doesn’t let herself call Keisuke an idiot anymore, but she does use other words with kind connotations). “You goofball, that’s clearly not her.”
The cat is really friendly, and Zoey has to draw the conclusion based on her fur and eye color that she’s Kurohime’s grandchild... or great-grandchild. Zoey has always had a talent for being a cat whisperer, so she gets cozy with it and picks it up to check if it needs care.
It has fleas and it’s a bit malnourished, and depending on the C.H.E.A.T.S stats and her overall acceptance as a woman, Zoey will either pick up the cat and see it’s male and name it something she wants that sounds masculine, be unable to tell what gender it is and name it something that sounds gender-neutral (though with a bit of a masculine lean), be unable to tell what gender it is and name it something that sounds gender-neutral (though with a bit of a feminine lean), or see that it’s female and name it something she wants that sounds feminine.
As she does this, another cat comes out, this one with yellow and black blotches. Based on how friendly it acts with Keisuke and Zoey, and with the other cat, they conclude that they’re siblings.
Zoey does the cat charming again and finds it in a similar state of health but is able to conclude definitively that it’s a boy. Keisuke names it something dumb and masculine.
The couple just look at each other and decide that they have to take these cats in. They can’t just leave them here and they’ve already named them.
They spend the afternoon looking for any other siblings without luck, but they’ll check again in a few days for a month because they don’t want to abandon any of them.
As they’re taking the cats home and Zoey comments on how remarkable that these cats were even here and are clearly related to Kurohime, Keisuke asks, “Well, how about kids of our own soon?”
Zoey will get flustered as fuck in response to this. Zoey at her most confident smugly says, “Why do you think the house we’re building has a nursery?” Zoey with a bit less confidence answers, “W-We’ll treat the cats as a trial run, okay?” in a very cute way with her first stutter in months (but she’s definitely excited about the idea). A less secure Zoey answers “I’m not sure I’m ready for that yet...” (she will be eventually).
Keisuke reminds Zoey that she’s always been good at building things, so building a family shouldn’t be an issue.
The two walk to Zoey’s car (it’s some clunker, but it’s painted Ferrari yellow) with the young cats as the title card “The Stray Black Cat” shows and the route ends.
So... yeah, those are almost all my cards for Keisuke, and I hope you folks can wait a year and a half at the very least to see it all!
There's an even crazier secret outline for what re:Dreamer (the app) is that I am keeping secret (unless I don't) until the final update of the game when it is done. It's actually batshit insane but so, so cool. Fun facts: several hints are in this post!
Until next time!