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hey all, thought i'd toss out a quick update, as things have sadly continued to be pretty quiet. i'm trying to work on some stuff as we speak, but it's coming very slowly.

it's hard to admit, but my health (specifically mental health) has not been the best - truthfully, probably currently at its worst overall that it has been. anxiety, panic, and obsession make it hard to get much done these days.  i'm working with my therapist again to try to get things back on track, but am currently unsure of what exactly is going on with me. what i do know is that i don't want to lose my creative spark or the life i've worked so hard to have, so i'm going to keep trying to get better. hopefully i'll be exploring some ways to make things more bearable soon.

in the mean time, i'm going to try to stream on sunday again and see how things go.

i love you all, and please, if you are ever dealing with mental health issues of any kind, reach out to somebody you love or a professional. it's nothing to shrug off. lord knows i've shrugged it off for so long. please take care.

thank you for the continued support. right now it means more than you could possibly imagine. ♥

Comments

Anonymous

Take as long as you need! Your health is the most important concern.

Anonymous

*pushing positive energy your way*

Anonymous

We will always be here for you! Keep fighting!! Never give in!

Anonymous

Hey Ren, sorry to hear you're not feeling well. I definitely know where you're at x.x As a fellow Canadian, I blame a combination of the weather and age. (I think we're mostly contemporaries. I'm 29.) For 4 years running Jan-Mar have been the hardest months of my year. I don't claim to know what's going on for you, but I definitely understand what it's like to fall apart, especially after being together and with it. I'm not sure that's where you're at, but I wish you all the best. You will triumph :)

Anonymous

Ren, I think it's great that you are expressing your current difficulties in terms of mental health. I know it's difficult to openly discuss it but as you said, keeping it hidden or shrugging it off is not a good idea. I know that I, along with many others here, won’t just leave if you take the time to help yourself get better. Spend time doing what you feel you need to do, not what you feel you HAVE to do. That being said, if in the middle of the stream you start to not feel so good, please don’t hesitate to turn it off. Your mental health is by far more important than biweekly streams and I don’t think anyone will feel poorly if you prioritise yourself, so please, do so. Otherwise I wish you all the best and I hope you get lots more support. Lots of love from this little corner of the world.

Anonymous

We'll always he here for subconscious support!

Anonymous

Those who would tell you that great art comes from great pain, a.k.a. the tortured genius trope, completely ignore all those who create wonders without greatly suffering, or the vast numbers who suffer and don't create anything. It is a garbage theory that deserves zero consideration - especially with how much we know about the science of mental health these days. Creative types advocating therapy and reaching out for help with mental/emotional issues is a beautiful thing. You may save more than yourself by doing this <3

Anonymous

Your music has made me so happy for so long and I am so proud to support your work and your life. I wish you a speedy recovery and a sustainable process.

Anonymous

Hey Ren. I've been listening to your music for a long-ass time now, and I have felt the same way you have been for a few years. Your music has made me feel so much better and all, and I really hope you are okay since I really do care for you, i'm a big fan and I hope that you can get well soon~!

Anonymous

Nooooo, feel better! Your music has really helped me through some dark times, and I wish I had something as wonderful to give back, but sadly, all I can give is my best wishes. Remember we're all here for you, and spring is just around the corner!

Anonymous

"If you’re going through hell, keep going."

lapfox

absolutely - the only way out is through, no other way will get things resolved.

Anonymous

please be ok please! ;w; i know I (and probably many others) will make sure to keep their support for you as strong as ever.