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update re: previous post about "Q&A / retrospective" streams (Patreon)

Published:
2019-02-09 02:34:10
Imported:
2021-03

Content

thanks for chiming in, i'm glad to hear it might seem interesting to yall

as for stream scheduling, it's a little tough for me as i prefer to be active in the evening or night lately, and because my sleep schedule isn't exactly 24 hours, so i drift a lot. because of this, the best thing i can do is post a notice a couple hours before i go live with one.

i'll see what i can do about recording these, even though i greatly prefer they not be. since they will be very conversational and off the cuff, it feels very weird for me to record and archive them. i'll have to think about it more, especially because there are websites that crosspost everything i post within just minutes (this is true for most even remotely-subscribed patreon users). it makes it tough to keep things exclusive beyond stuff that happens in stream or stuff that is sent via messages to users.

regarding scheduling and my mental heatlh, accounting for any kind of scheduling would require i completely rewire my brain's sleep patterns, which i can't do. i've tried several times, and it causes probably the most hopeless depression i've ever experienced. this is part of why the old sunday streams weren't sustainable for me, i pretty much wanted to curl up and die having to engineer my sleep around them.

that said, keep an eye out and we'll go from there. it is not possible for me to accommodate everybody here, and that's just a fact of things.

Comments

Anonymous

Which time zone are you in? I can roughly build my schedule to fit these in 😎 But regardless thanks for trying to do them✌️

Anonymous

That's worrying behavior. You should bring that up with your therapist and discuss ways to turn that around.

lapfox
>>19791985

excuse me? non-24 hour sleep disorder is not inherently "worrying" and my doctor is aware of it - the option is to take prescription stimulants at the same time every day so i'm always asleep by the same time every night, but the stimulants that are typically used for this are not ones i want to be taking every day. both that and my depression aren't dealt with through therapy - therapy is where i bring my anxieties, not where i get medicated. the way you worded that is the way you talk to somebody close who you actually understand the behavior patterns of, not somebody you only know through various internet interactions over the years. it comes off as incredibly rude.

Anonymous
>>19791985

This is the first time I've ever seen you mention this explicitly. Do you reasonably expect people to glean a disorder from what sounds like for all intents and purposes a shitty sleep schedule? I have a shitty sleep schedule, especially on days off. Most people do anymore. Hell, I'm supposed to be asleep right now since I have to get up in under 6 hours for work. Before I had a job, I "drifted" in a similar fashion because there was nothing that I needed to set an alarm for, so I just slept whenever. In this day and age, it's not the first thing that comes to mind in reference to poor scheduling of rest. "Not exactly 24 hours" in a common day to day situation implies bad sleep schedule to me and I know I'm not alone. Canadian therapists must have differing views on prescribing medication than American ones. Par for the course, really. As for my wording, you seem to have made a simple expression of concern and support out to be greater than it is. I do care about you, that's why I posted that to begin with. If I hated or no longer cared about you, I wouldn't be here. But, you appear to have an inflated notion of me and my own perceptions. I'm well aware that I'm interacting with the public representation of you, not you in private. My statement and sentiments were based off of what is already publicly known, that you have chosen to reveal. I've never claimed to be close to you, and even if I did, no one would believe me. That ship sailed in 2008. Would you like an explicit declaration of my intent? "I care about you and want you to get better." Simplified canned gestures like that don't roll too well, though. It sounds unrealistic or awkward to say. Of course, I could have written paragraphs of text, but I'd had a pretty shit week thus far. Valentine's Week really gearing up, working indie retail in a tourist trap and all that. Didn't have it in me that time. So, I defaulted to local bluntness. (It's because of the tourism, you try catering to multitudes of impatient customers at once and being more engaging than that.) First thing on my mind: "hm, worried about that. Hope they get that checked." Clean that up, boom, bed time. Long story short, you put much more thought into the potential "what ifs" behind that statement than me writing the damned thing. Not that it would have mattered if I had said anything different, anyway. Coming off as rude wasn't my intent. I care about you and want you to get better.