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Here's the original. https://www.furaffinity.net/view/7027182 I changed the dialogue quite a bit on the new page and brought it more in line with Pauls character.

I like the new page better, it  shows a bit more of pauls personality, whereas in the first run through I will still sorta working that out at this stage of the comic.  Anyway have the new page.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/tjzyiuw4lfof84s/115.png?dl=0

Comments

Anonymous

Retellings are often better, much like a stew the second time around. You definitely seem more intimate with Paul's character with this new telling.