🎉 Birthday Bearhemoth (+ 7 Bonus Photos!) (Patreon)

It's my birthday! 🎂 I'm over seventy pounds bigger than I was last year. I plan to spend the day alone in a dark room, with my drink, contemplating the ennui of existence (not really).

I recently read an article outlining things one should do for their birthday, which included suggestions like "Run your first marathon", "Dance until you're drenched in a Russian foam club", "Have a Mad Hatter tea party" or "Start your special day with a mimosa and brunch from the comfort of a retreat with a gorgeous view, then spend your day exploring nature by hiking, zip-lining, and biking, and call it a night with a massage under the stars".

I'm excited to announce I will be doing exactly none of those things, because they all sound exhausting! I'd rather just have some cake, a lot of champagne, and dim lighting, with a sexy friend.

What will you do on your next birthday?