Choose Your Own Brainwashing, Day 29 - Part 4 (Patreon)

Once you are on your knees, you simply wait to be told what to do next.

Lee just looks at you. Assessing. Evaluating.

“While you do look good on your knees, some people just look better that way and I think you’re one of them, I’m not sure you’re quite ready for that yet. Stand up.”

Somehow, you go from kneeling to standing with nothing in between. (Yes.)

‘You see, doing things just because I’ve told you to do them is wonderful to a point. But it’s not really obedience when you can’t decide to do it for yourself. So…”

At first you can’t tell what is happening, just that you feel changed somehow, like something is pulling away from you. And then, as your knees begin to hurt, just a little bit, you realize that the blanket of compliance that has been insulating you is being stripped away. And for the first time in what feels like days your usually ever-present internal monologue is back in full force.

(“So I’m not going to bring you completely out of trance, I’m not going to bring you out of trance at all, but for a while you’re going to feel and think like you are out of trance. All the noisy thoughts and impulses that quiet down so nicely for me are going to be back at full volume, and for a little while you’ll even be able to say ‘no’ to me if you want to.”)

It feels terrible.

“Thanks, I hate it.” you tell Lee, only half joking.

“Don’t worry, it won’t be for long. Just long enough to check in on on something.”

“If it’s about my obedience, you had that before we started all this.”

“Oh, I know, but it’s good to remind both of us from time to time that ultimately you’re willing, and not coerced.”

“I mean, you could coerce me if you wanted…” you say hopefully, and Lee laughs.

“Of course I could but for now you can just <snap> deep sleep drop right back down to where you were before, down into that lovely, comfortable compliant space, you can just go right back to having no will but mine.

“And you and I both know that there are mantras that you say while you’re on your knees for me, and you and I both know that usually, when you’re not quite this mindfucked, you automatically know which mantra is appropriate for which occasion. And the next time I order you to kneel, you can find that the part of you that knows what to chant is paying attention.”

“Now, KNEEL. And do it right this time.”

(YES.)

Which mantra will you choose?

1. “I kneel for Lee.”
2. “Obedience.”
3. Write your own.
4. “Happy toys obey.”