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"How are you feeling?" Myst asked Amy as he walked over to where she was sitting with Selena by the campfire cooking breakfast.

"Like there's a stranger looking back at me in the mirror," Amy admitted after a couple of seconds of thought. "I spent half the night torturing myself and I feel fine, pretty sure I should be in a psych ward and I actually feel good, it's disconcerting? Strange? Weird?"

"I'd be doing the same if I had your talent," Myst replied as he knelt down on the sand so he could read the notes that Selena had put on each of the corrupted crystals. "Have you tried using the spell to create technique scrolls?"

"I practiced until it couldn't rip my flesh off then enough that it couldn't destroy my flesh when it was used. I also used a bag of mana crystals boosting my magic until the cursed runes couldn't sink in, then I spent twenty minutes with a large rock smashing my toes until I couldn't even break the skin," Amy offered, fairly sure she needed sleep and some therapy.

Myst glanced at Amy's bare feet then at the regeneration necklace she was wearing. "Have you tried sleeping?"

Amy yawned. "I snagged a couple of hours before the nightmares woke me up."

"Monsters?" Myst asked.

Amy scowled as she thought about her nightmare. "I carved my face off then started stealing faces."

"Fun," Myst muttered, making a mental note to give Amy the first working dream catcher he found.

"Not really," Amy complained.

"And done," Selena said cheerfully as she finished writing the last card for the corrupted crystals.

"Did we get anything useful?" Myst asked, glad for the distraction because Amy seemed a bit out of it.

Selena gestured at the five crystals that were sitting off to the side of the wooden tray she was using to organize the crystals. "They're mostly junk or twisted as hell but a couple of them might be worth the side effects, assuming the right person uses them."

"What type of side effects are we talking about?" Myst asked.

"The crystal that gives you an upgradable spirit beast boosting aura cripples your legs and halves your strength and endurance. Amy should be able to reverse the physical changes since the negatives aren't linked to the talent, leaving Taylor with an aura that boosts her minions."

"In theory," Amy warned them.

"Or we could avoid the risk and feed the aura boosting crystal to one of Taylor's minions," Myst suggested. "No point in risking Taylor's health when giving one of her minions the ability would let her spread the ability around."

"Probably better," Selena admitted. "The sex talent lets you burn permanent mana to increase your partner's maximum mana, Akari would get more back than she spent because of her other talent if they're wearing the coconut bikini."

"It's like the universe wants to see her naked and fucking people," Amy complained. "Where's my talent that rewards me for healing people?"

"Can you honestly say you don't want to watch Akari have sex with people?" Myst asked.

"That's not the point," Amy argued as she worked on flipping the bacon so it wouldn't burn.

"Third crystal on the left," Selena offered cheerfully. "It gives you a special inventory for sex related items and a sex related gift every time you heal someone."

"I meant something useful," Amy grumbled as she finished flipping the bacon.

"Free loot, is free loot," Selena pointed out.

"You might be able to upgrade the inventory to include normal things," Myst pointed out, rather amused by the talent.

Amy checked the description stuck to the crystal then used the crystal before she could change her mind, picking up the new talent.

"What else did we get?" Myst asked Selena, curious if they'd managed to get something that was worth the mana.

"Lots of minor cultivation boosters that come with insanity or questionable compulsions like eating people or fucking girls with large butts while removing your ability to lie, a talent to turn your hands into water, they don't reform, a talent to turn yourself into a monster in the dark, a talent that increases the acidity of your piss to the point where it eats through your body and kills you, a talent that lets you write with your toes that causes excessive hair growth on your feet, a talent for growing plants out of your skin like a chia pet and a crystal that turns the bones in your arms into chalk and gives you a talent that drastically increases the durability of the bones in your legs. There's also a talent that lets you see in the dark and a talent that turns you into a monster that gets more dangerous and unhinged the more people you kill."

"Yeah, that's about what I was expecting," Myst mused as he pulled a cursed upgrade tile out of his pocket and tossed it to Selena. "Can you boost the crystal that boosts your legs? I want to see if we can upgrade it."

Selena eagerly used the upgrade tile on the crystal that would turn a person's arm bones into chalk then checked the crystal with her magnifying glass. "It upgraded the talent to include your hips and the bones of your feet and make them nearly indestructible but it twisted the crystal so that it will turn the bones in your arms into magnesium and light them on fire when it gives you the talent."

Amy winced, having far more experience with burns than she wanted. "That sounds like a good way to kill yourself."

"Unless you have a decent amount of fire resistance and regeneration and someone that is willing to rip your arms off. We need a wookie," Myst mused.

Selena shook her head. "We're not droids."

"I'm pretty sure they aren't limited to ripping the arms off droids," Myst argued.

"You're fucking insane, you know that right?" Amy asked, mentally weighing the risk that the regeneration necklace wouldn't be able to fix her arms against the benefits. 'There's too much of a risk of the crystal changing someone's DNA or 'template' so we're supposed to have magnesium bones as far as the necklace is concerned.'

"I'd use it if I could," Myst replied, wishing that he could use the corrupted crystals since he'd love indestructible bones.

"Same," Selena agreed, knowing her aunt would blow a couple of gaskets if she used something that turned her arms into magnesium, even if they had a 'fix'.

Amy shook her head. "I don't want to risk getting stuck with magnesium bones and my talent is already going to make my bones nearly indestructible with enough time and damage, we should probably give someone else the chance."

"Taylor or Ron then?" Myst asked, knowing that Akari would be getting an insane amount of durability from Amy and that Peter and Gwen were already decently durable thanks to their powers.

"Taylor," Amy said as Taylor walked out of the cabin, "Ron's durability should increase with his training."

"What's up?" Taylor asked as she walked over, doing her best to get her eyes to adjust.

"One of the crystals can give you nearly indestructible leg bones but we'll have to rip your arms off while you're wearing the regeneration necklace, are you interested?" Selena asked cheerfully.

Taylor stared at Selena for a couple of seconds as she processed the question then looked at Amy. "Can you fix my arms if something goes wrong?"

"It might take a bit more work but I should be able to," Amy assured her.

"What do I need to do?" Taylor asked without hesitation, knowing that it would give her an edge when she became a hero.

Myst glanced at the cabin. "That depends, was Akari still sleeping when you got up?"

"Yeah, she's still out like a light," Taylor replied.

"No point in waking her up. Let's grab some food then we can feed the extra crystals to your minions," Myst suggested as he went back to reading through Selena's notes on the crystals.

"Is there something wrong with the talent that lets you see in the dark?" Amy asked.

"Your eyes shift to look like dragon eyes while you're using the talent but you don't have to use it so it's a straight upgrade," Selena assured them.

"Can I use the crystal?" Amy asked hopefully, thinking of the various times that seeing in the dark would be useful.

Selena shrugged. "I can already see in the dark."

"I'm good," Taylor assured them, "I can borrow my spirit beast's night vision."

"Go for it," Myst replied as he picked up the crystal and tossed it to Amy. "You've been patching everyone up and the talent should be common enough that we'll get more eventually."

"Thanks," Amy replied as she used the crystal, causing her eyes to turn green and slitted, making them look like something straight out of a movie since they had more sparkles in them than cats' eyes.

"Are we sure the bacon is safe?" Taylor asked.

"I tossed everything into a cold box last night, it's fine," Selena assured them.

Taylor glanced at Selena's arm where the tattoo would be if it was visible. "You had a cold box in your supplies?"

Selena chuckled. "Nope, I charmed some rocks to stay cold and stuck everything in a pit. I doubt I can get things cold enough to freeze solid without an actual box to carve the runes into but it should be cold enough to last a week or two."

"We can always feed it to Taylor's minions once we've had enough," Myst replied, not seeing a point in risking their health when he could just farm more or have Ron conjure something.

"Bacon!" Ron said as he rushed out of the cabin wearing a pair of Hawaiian shorts.

'At least everyone is having a good time,' Myst mused as he sent his avatar towards the pirate ship in the bay.

0o0o0

'Is this because the island is cursed or did I just not explore enough of the cultivation pocket dimension?' Myst's avatar mused as he flew towards the pirate ship, wondering why everything had shifted from day to night when he'd reached the bay. He did his best to stay low to the water so they'd have less chance of spotting him in the night sky. Thankfully, the pirates on watch looked three sheets to the wind so his approach had gone unnoticed.

Myst froze in place when he caught a glimpse of something large and metallic over the side of the ship. 'What the hell?' He floated a touch higher, wanting a better view of the deck before he got closer, despite the risk that the pirates might see him. 'That explains the ticking and the clanking,' he mused when he got a decent look at the rowboat sized mechanical crocodile that was patrolling on the deck.

'Why do they have a giant metal crocodile on the ship? You better have decent loot,' Myst complained as he continued flying towards the ship. 'Okay, I don't care why they have a giant metal crocodile, I just need to get close enough to blast the crew then I can deal with the beast, unless it can breathe fire or acid I should be able to stay out of range.'

'Worst case, they'll kill me and I lose access to the pocket dimension,' Myst's avatar mused as he closed the distance, fairly sure his gloves would provide enough armor that they wouldn't be able to seriously hurt him. He accepted the rock his other half handed him then tossed it at the guard's head that was supposed to be on lookout on the other side of the boat, causing the startled and concussed guard to fall into the water and causing everyone to look the wrong way.

"Man overboard!" one of the pirates shouted.

Myst waited a couple of seconds until the pirates bunched up then blasted the group with a stream of lightning and held it on the pirates as they thrashed on the deck screaming in agony. He twitched as one of the other pirates pulled out a flintlock and took a wild shot in his general direction. He pulled his attention off the collection of loot the dead pirates had dropped and turned the lightning on the pirate with a gun, causing the man to scream before he died. He finished the last pirate climbing the rigging then turned the lightning on the crocodile, not seeing a reason to get anywhere near the monster if he didn't have to, especially since it looked like it could bite him in half.

Myst sighed in relief when the clockwork crocodile finally stopped twitching and vanished after twenty eight or nine seconds of getting fried by lightning, leaving behind a chest. 'How the hell are you supposed to fight that?' he complained as he glanced up at the rigging, trying to find something that he could have dropped on the crocodile since his strongest attack had taken half a minute to kill the monster. 'Maybe you were supposed to shoot the creature from the edges of the boat or you're supposed to use a cannon?'

'Or you're supposed to get it to charge off the boat?' Myst mused as he floated over to the scattered bits of treasure and started looting, not particularly happy about the idea of losing a treasure chest. He collected two tricorn hats, a flintlock pistol and a bottle of whiskey from the pile of loot, figuring he'd come back for the rest of the loot once he made sure the boat was safe.

Myst froze when he accidently touched the deck with his foot and the captain's door opened, revealing a man with a silver hook that was wearing an expensive looking pirate outfit.

"I am Captain-" the captain's song was cut short by the stream of lightning that Myst hit the man with, causing him to fall to the ground screaming.

Myst held the lightning on the captain until he vanished, leaving a silver hook, a silver key, a tricorn hat and a scroll. 'That was anticlimactic but I'm not letting a villain monologue.' He glanced around to make sure no one was sneaking up on him then flew over to the door and peeked inside the captain's lavishly furnished quarters. "Tinkerbell?!" he blurted out when he saw the black iron cage hanging from the ceiling that held a pixie.

"I'm not fucking Tinkerbell! I'm Bella," the pixie complained.

"Sorry," Myst offered.

"It's fine, just get me out of here and we'll call it even," Bella replied, looking forward to getting out of the cage.

"Give me a minute." Myst picked up the loot from the captain then walked over and shoved the chest into the real world, wanting to make sure any traps couldn't sink the boat. He walked over and shoved the cage and Bella into the real world, not really expecting the pixie to get teleported. "Huh."

"Eh, the world needs more pixies," Myst muttered as he walked over to the bed that looked like it had silk sheets. "Pretty sure pirates aren't supposed to have silk sheets or feather beds," he muttered as he pushed down on the bed, causing the feather mattress to depress. 'Yoink!' He shoved the bed to the real world.

Myst handed his other half the key then walked over to the closet to see if he had anything worth stealing."Damn," he muttered when he saw the high quality, if old fashioned clothes. 'You could supply an entire renaissance fair by yourself.' He turned his attention to the scroll. 'Shadow clone: this spell allows the user to turn their shadow into a temporary clone, letting the caster accomplish twice the work. While the clones are generally helpful, they don't like wasting time and forget having them do your homework or other boring tasks, they have a limited lifespan and want to enjoy the time they have. For good or ill, you'll get their memories when they pop or when the spell ends at twilight. Any appreciable amount of damage to the clones will pop them like balloons.'

'Is this because of Peter Pan's weird shadow? Or was this just a weird ship filled with ninja pirates that didn't look like ninjas?' Myst handed his other half the scroll so that Amy could use the scroll and make copies of the spell then got to work looting the closet.

0o0o0

"Can I call dibs on the next feather mattress?" Akari asked hopefully as she walked over to examine the feather mattress that Myst had looted while they'd been helping Taylor acquire her new talent.

"Sure," Myst replied absently as he glanced past Akari and Amy and over at where Taylor was grabbing a shower. "How's she doing?"

"Better than I would be," Akari admitted softly. "Dibs on the next bed," she said, wanting to sleep on something a touch more comfortable than a lawn chair. "We gave her a blindfold then she used the technique and we cut her arms off. We had to rip the metal bones out of her stumps because they were on fire but the regeneration fixed everything."

"There's something seriously wrong with your technique," Amy complained, unhappy about the twisted crystal and having to watch Akari rip Taylor's bones out then make sure everything was fixed.

"No shit," Myst replied, feeling a little sarcastic. "Sorry, thanks for dealing with the crystal. Can you use her legs as a template?" he asked, hoping it was worth the emotional scars.

Amy nodded. "It wouldn't be the same or even close but it's worth running some animal tests, I should be able to get at least a twenty percent increase in durability, probably more."

Myst glanced over at where Taylor was taking a shower then focused on Amy. "Every bit helps."

"Where did you get the feather mattress?" Akari asked.

"On a pirate ship, the guy had expensive tastes," Myst replied as he glanced over at the pixie that was devouring a plate filled with nachos that Ron had conjured for her. "I'm hoping it respawns."

"Would be nice," Selena agreed.

Akari frowned as she realized she might not want the bed. "We should probably wash it."

"I used a spell to make sure everything is clean," Selena assured them.

Akari sighed in relief. "That's a relief."

Amy glanced at the scrolls that Selena was examining with her magnifying glass. "What other techniques did we get?"

Selena smiled at Amy. "There's a spell that gives the caster a singing wart, a ritual that costs two random ribs but permanently increases your flexibility and a spell to open a small portal to a dimension of tiny singing bears that will trade incomplete spells for honey."

"Gone? That's better than turning your bones to magnesium and igniting them but your ribs are sort of important," Amy complained, glad that they'd decided to blindfold Taylor so she hadn't seen her arms burning on the ground. "I should be able to use some of the meat to rebuild some ribs."

"Mmh, pork, it's what's for dinner," Akari teased, recalling the smell of Taylor’s burning flesh and its resemblance to the smell of bacon.

Amy reached out and swatted Akari's behind. "Too soon."

"That's fair," Akari admitted, glad that she'd gotten a slight smile out of her bad joke.

Ron pulled his attention off the pixie that was devouring a chip that was larger than she was and looked at Selena. "Do you think the bears would notice the difference if I conjured the honey?"

"It's probably safer if we don't try, I don't want to wake up tied up over a fire and covered in conjured honey because you offended them," Selena warned him.

"We should probably find some real honey first," Ron mused, fairly sure there should be some type of hive on the island.

"Best of luck," Myst replied, wishing he remembered the show well enough to tell him if they had honey bees. 'Then again, the show was run for comedy, not realism.'

Amy glanced toward the cabin. "Where did Peter and Gwen wander off to?"

Myst gestured toward the hills. "They said something about testing their powers and taking a hike."

"Makes sense," Amy replied with a yawn then sprawled out on the lawn chair, hoping that she could get some sleep without her nightmares coming back.

0o0o0

Comments

ZeroLink21

Man those are some really twisted techniques lol definitely good idea not to let the villain monolog