My Mutant Kitchen - Lemon Poppy Seed Cupcakes with Almond Cream Cheese Frosting (Patreon)

 Hello fellow mutants! B&J here for the first episode of My Mutant Kitchen. Recently we have been getting very into “Cupcake Wars” so for our recipe, we thought we’d teach you a really simple cupcake hack that will give you moist cupcakes that, we have been told, are better than sex. 

Stick with us now. Start with your favorite cake mix. I’m sure there are people out there who are saying this is cheating, but professional cake bakers use cake mix all the time. Yes, those multi-tiered cakes that are the envy of weddings everywhere are actually made out of your standard boxed mix.

On the back of the mix you’ll see it call for some sort of fat and some sort of liquid. Replace the fat, usually oil, with melted butter. Replace the liquid with buttermilk. If buttermilk is hard to come by, you can also use a combination of sour cream and water for the same effect, or you can just use normal milk if you want your cake to be less rich.

But honey, what’s the point of making a cake if you aren’t going to indulge a little.

You’ll be adding exactly how many eggs as you normally would, and now here comes the secret ingredient: instant pudding mix. 

You can use any combination of flavors you want. I’m a big fan of mixing yellow cake mix with lemon pudding along with some poppy seeds to create a lemon poppy cake. But the sky’s the limit. Chocolate butterscotch? Double chocolate cheesecake? Rich buttery fudge? Smooth red velvet with white chocolate? You decide. Just make sure that it’s instant pudding mix.

Mix the pudding mix into your cake batter and watch the magic happen. There’s actually quite a bit of interesting science going on here. The thickeners in the instant pudding, usually a form of reconstituted starch, trap water in your batter. So when your cake bakes and rises, that water will be trapped inside. It will cause your cake to be super moist, staying fresh even days after you bake it. Seriously!

Then all you have to do is put your mix into your tin of choice and bake it up. For those of you who aren’t feeling super adventurous, here’s our lemon poppy seed cupcake recipe. Just be careful. These go down easy. We’ve been known to scarf down more than half a batch in a day if we don’t watch ourselves. And don’t forget to lick the bowl.

Ingredients

Cupcakes

· 1 package yellow cake mix

· 1 package instant lemon pudding

· 1 teaspoon lemon extract

· 2 teaspoons vanilla extract or paste

· 2 tablespoons poppy seeds

· 1/3 cup butter, melted

· 1 cup active cultured buttermilk

· 3 eggs

Frosting

· 8 oz cream cheese

· 6 tbsp butter

· 4 cups powdered sugar

· 1/2 tsp almond extract

Instructions

1. Preheat the oven to 350 F.

2. Combine cake and pudding mix in a large bowl.

3. Add eggs, buttermilk, butter, and extracts and beat with a hand mixer, or with the whisk attachment of a stand mixer on high for several minutes. You want to get some air into the mixture. The batter should look pudding-like when you are done. 

4. Fold in poppy seeds with a silicon spatula. Don’t overwork the batter, you don’t want the air to escape.

5. Generously grease a cupcake tin, or line one with cupcake wrappers.

6. Fill each cup little more than halfway with the batter. These cupcakes like to rise so don’t overfill. Make sure to tap your tin on the counter afterward so it all levels off.

7. Bake for about 20 minutes or until a knife or tester comes out clean when inserted into the center of a cupcake.

8. For the icing, add the cream cheese and butter into a large mixer bowl and beat until combined and smooth.

9. Add about half of the powdered sugar and mix until well combined.

10. Add extracts and remaining powdered sugar and mix until well combined and smooth. Add more or less powdered sugar until you get to your desired consistency.

11. Ice your cupcakes and dig in!

This recipe makes about 24 cupcakes, more than enough no matter how many mouths you have.

Until next time. Happy baking mutants!