Nine-to-Five 00 (Patreon)

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In Medias Res

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The main branch of Prince Bank was located in Roger Point, the commercial center of Port Stanley. While not one of the city’s many iconic skyscrapers, the building still had many admirers among the architecturally-inclined. With its pure white Corinthian columns and long-angled triangular roof with sculptures of mighty heroes on its front, it resembled a Greek temple of old.

On the inside, black and white marble warred with each other on the floors, and beautiful paintings decorated the walls. While not exclusively for the wealthy, those who came to this particular branch of Prince Bank tended to be at least on the upper end of middle class. As such, the bank had multiple security measures in place to better protect its clients.

Today, they had all failed.

“He-llo Everyone! I hope you have been having a fantastic week so far! It is just lovely to see you all!”

The voice was loud and cheerful, yet it had an odd, robotic cadence to it. It was as if those words were coming from an old voice generator, and looking at the person speaking, that might not be far from the truth.

He was well over six feet tall, his whole body covered in a sleek yet sturdy black, armored bodysuit. Neon green lines ran along the length of the outfit, mimicking the shape of circuitry. His head was fully encased in a black helmet, a big barrel-like thing with a flat top. Where his eyes would be, two rectangular lenses glowed with an eerie green light.

Not a single part of his face could be seen. Not an inch of skin was exposed. Overall, he looked like a cross between a futuristic android and an armored knight of old.

His name was Gaheris.

He was a supervillain.

“I’m going to need you all to put your hands up!” Gaheris said in the same cheerful voice that would have been entirely at odds with his appearance had it not been for its robotic quality. The tips of his gauntleted fingers had opened to reveal gun-like barrels, which he aimed at the people around him. His fingers sparked with the same light that shone through his eyes.

“This right here is a good old-fashioned bank robbery! I am sure you are all smart people. You have seen movies! You have seen TV shows! You live here! You know how this goes! Knees on the floor. Hands up. Heads down. No one get any ideas!”

Moving too fast for anyone there to see, Gaheris turned left and pointed. A small burst of green light fired from one of his fingers, hitting one of the bank tellers. The man immediately dropped to the floor, unconscious.

“Like that guy,” Gaheris went on without missing a beat, his loud voice easily imposing itself over the panicked gasps of the people he was holding hostage. “He got the idea of sounding the alarm, and he got hit with a stun blast for it. He’ll probably pee his pants while unconscious and feel super embarrassed when he wakes up. Do you want to pee in your pants? No? Good. Knees on the floor. Hands up. Heads down. No ideas. That’s simple enough, right?”

One more wave of his hands was all it took to put everyone on the same page. Hands went up. Heads were lowered. Knees touched the floor.

“There. Perfect! Great job! I am. So proud. Of everyone here! Thank You!”

[Did you let him sound the silent alarm?]

A female voice came in through his comm system. Gaheris heard it loud and clear, but his suit prevented the noise from getting out. Similarly, no one around heard him reply.

[What sort of question is that? Do you think I’m an idiot, Tristan? No. Wait. Don’t answer that. Anyway, yeah. I let him hit the alarm]

[Good. With any luck, the response team will be here in a few minutes.]

Gaheris beamed inside his helmet. [With any luck, it’ll be your boyfriend’s team.]

[He’s. Not. My. Boyfriend!] An irritated sigh came through the line. [Just… just keeps things calm while I finish down here.]

[No. Problem.]

“You.” Gaheris pointed to one of the tellers. The man’s eyes went wide with panic as he walked over to him. “No need to look scared. I’m not going to shock you or anything. I just need you to fill this sack full of money.”

As he spoke, Gaheris shoved a burlap sack into his hands. A big beige thing that was probably a few decades old.

“M-money?”

“All paper bills. No coins. No credit cards. Just good old-fashioned green stuff. Go on. Get to it. I want you to empty all of this for me.” He said, gesturing at the various tellers and their machines.

[Ugh. This is so transparent. No one is going to buy it. In the first place, a bank robbery is such an old-fashioned idea.]

[Not this again.] Gaheris rolled his eyes inside his helmet. [Next, you’re going to start telling me about how credit fraud is way more lucrative, and electronic transactions are where the most money is at anyway!]

[Both those things are true. People are going to think it!]

[Look, first of all, it’s harder to track paper money! That’s why so many villains steal from banks! Second, it is not about efficiency! That sort of talk is for assholes like Kay. This is about romance!]

[The romance of stealing a bank?]

[Yes! What is even the point of being a supervillain if we can’t do this sort of stuff? Do you think Claymore doesn’t know she could make way more money as a demolitions expert?]

[Using your psycho ex as a frame of reference is not in any way convincing or comforting.]

[Fine.] Gaheris dragged out the word, rolling his eyes. [Not her. What about Gentleman and all his super classy heists of exotic gemstones? He never sells those things, you know? It’s all for himself. That’s the difference between a criminal and a supervillain. Freedom, Tristan! Freedom! The Freedom to do what we want even if it’s not legal, moral, or efficient!]

Freedom was as American as apple pie, so you knew it was good!

[Fine. Fine. I’ll leave you to it. Have fun with your antiquated hobbies.]

[I Will!]

Even as he kept talking, Gaheris made sure to keep track of everyone in the room. His nanites had already hacked into the security systems and locked all the exits. He didn’t have to worry about anyone coming into the lobby and panicking. Even if there were people in other rooms of the bank, they didn’t matter. Not right now.

A beep from his helmet told him it had finished scanning the crowd. Everyone here was 100% human. There were no Exceeds. Not yet, at least.

That would change in about six minutes or so.

“Alright, everyone! We’re doing just fine! You are all doing a wonderful job! Just a few more minutes left! Then we can all go our separate ways! Keep doing as you are! If anyone’s got any questions, don’t hesitate to raise your hand.”

Gaheris’ suit had twelve different cameras, which gave him 360-degree vision. In the beginning, it had been hard to keep track of all the different feeds being transmitted directly to his retinas, but he had long since gotten used to such things. It was why he immediately noticed the little girl raising her hand behind him.

Even so, he was a little surprised.

He hadn’t actually expected anyone to raise their hand.

As Gaheris walked over to the girl, a woman, likely the girl’s mother, tried to put herself between him and her, a task that would have been easier if the little girl didn’t constantly try to scurry around to try and get closer to him. The woman whispered and hissed at her daughter to stay still, but the little girl wouldn’t listen.

“Hey there, little girl,” he said, kneeling so he was at eye level with her. She was an adorable little thing with dimpled cheeks, big brown eyes, and pigtails. “Something you want to ask?”

“Mister Gaheris!” The little girl cried out, finally managing to escape her mother’s grip. “Can I have your autograph?!”

It wasn’t the first time someone asked for his autograph. Not even remotely. He and Tristan had been active long enough to gather a decent fan following. They even had a couple of websites dedicated to them. It helped that they were not the mass-murdering type of supervillain. It made them look approachable to the general public. Bad enough to be cool, but not to the point of being total psychos like The Circle.

So yeah, this was hardly the first time someone asked for Gaheris’ autograph.

He was still glad for his helmet, or else everyone would have seen the big grin threatening to split his face.

“I am sorry!” The girl’s mother said, misinterpreting his silence. “She’s young! She doesn’t know any better!”

“It is okay,” Gaheris said as soothingly as he could while inwardly thinking the girl was lucky to have such a good mom. No sane parent should want their kids near a supervillain, even if it was an approachable supervillain.

Especially if it was an approachable supervillain.

“More than okay, even! I’ll be happy to! Anything for a fan!” He looked left and right. It was mostly for show as his cameras showed him everything without needing to turn. “Do you happen to have a pen and paper? Anyone?”

“Here!” Another woman stepped up to offer him a pen and a notepad. His face recognition software had revealed her identity to him the second he entered the bank, not that he’d needed it.

Contrary to what some people thought, he did watch the news.

“Thank you,” Gaheris said, taking the items from her hands. He tapped his helmet with the pen as if he was trying to think of something. Then he clicked his tongue and pointed at her. “Lisa Grant, right?”

The blonde woman flashed him a smile that showed her pearly white teeth. “From Excelsior News, yes. As long as you are fielding questions, I was wondering if I could have a few.”

“I thought I recognized you. You know what? Sure, why not? First things first, though.” He turned to the little girl. “To whom do I make it to?”

“Marie!”

“Ooh, nice name! I knew a Marie once. Coolest girl ever.”

“Really?” Marie’s eyes shined in the way only the eyes of truly innocent people were capable of.

“Cross my heart and hope to die,” Gaheris replied. “Here’s to my friend Marie.” His pen made elegant strokes on the paper before he pulled it out and handed it to Marie. “May you grow up to be just as cool as the Marie I know.”

Marie gave off a happy little squeal as she clutched the piece of paper as if it were the most precious thing in the world.

“I will! I so will!”

“Good girl. Now, go to your mother!” The girl never had the chance to do as she was told. The moment the words left his lips, the mother engulfed her daughter in a tight hug and quickly pulled her away from him.

“Gaheris.” The reporter did not waste time. She already had her recorder out. “Is it true that Slate has approached you about membership in The Supreme? If so, how would you reconcile that with your current actions?”

“Well,” Gaheris chuckled. “I am pretty sure my actions right now should be proof you really shouldn’t go around listening to every rumor out there. I’ve never gotten an offer like that, and if I ever did, I’d say no.”

“You say that even though you and Slate fought against the Raiders just last month?”

“It was a super cool fight!” Marie piped up from her mother’s arms. She had probably seen it on the internet.

“It was a super cool fight,” Gaheris agreed, nodding. “But it was a one-off. Slate’s a stand-up guy, and I owed him one, so I helped him out. That’s it.”

“Against a group of well-known supervillains?” Lisa Grant would not be deterred, it seemed.

“Why not?” He shrugged. “It is not as if I have to worry about losing a club membership or something. It doesn’t work that way. Besides, like I said, Slate’s a good guy. I know lots of people still have their doubts about him because of the whole robot thing, but they should really give him a chance.”

“Oh?” Lisa’s green eyes shined. “Is that a pro-AI sentiment I hear?”

“I prefer to see it as a pro-Slate sentiment,” he replied while trying to remember Agravain’s lessons on media stuff. “I know every time a scientist tries to mess with AI, we get a new would-be supreme overlord like Neutron, NEXT, or ISIS. I don’t blame Slate for hiding it as long as he did, and I can’t blame people for not feeling a lot of love for the guy right now, but I can tell you he’s one cool dude and deserves respect. I’m not in any hurry to turn face, but I can give credit where credit is due.”

“And does this support not have anything to do with the many rumors surrounding you and Tristan ever since your debut?”

“Gaheris is not a robot!” Marie shouted, making the supervillain chuckle.

“What she said. Although I guess I can’t blame people for thinking that. Tristan and I do hang out in these suits all the time.” When they had first shown up, people had assumed they had tech-based powers. However, as AIs became a hot topic, it hadn’t taken long for rumors about the two to start circulating. “But really, what are we supposed to do? Show off some skin?”

“Oh, I am sure there are quite a few magazines that would appreciate that,” Lisa Grant said with a professional smile. “You and Tristan had a remarkable ranking in NOW’s Hottest Supers List despite wearing full-body suits.”

Gaheris rolled his eyes then his neck so people would be able to notice.

“Please, don’t remind me. Tristan was like a peacock after that. She has a copy of the magazine framed, you know?”

“Oh? Please, do tell.”

~~~

It was hard to be the responsible one. Those were Tristan’s most sincere thoughts as she blasted her way through another underground vault.

Much like Gaheris, her suit was mostly black, but where Gaheris’ suit was green, hers shined with an angry red. Her helmet was rounder and had a single red visor instead of two lenses. Additionally, her suit was smaller and more slender on account of her frame. While she did not possess the exaggerated curves Exceed like Claymore always seemed to develop, no one would mistake her for a man, something she was thankful for.

She had NOT strutted like a peacock after NOW’s list had come out. Anyone who claimed otherwise was a filthy liar.

A terrified security guard raised his gun at her. A blast of red energy left her fingers and hit him square in the chest. Then she did the same to the other three guards in the room.

Her blasts were set to stun. In the early days of her… career, the stun setting was the only one she had dared to use. A long time had passed since then, but she still used the stun setting more often than not.

It was simply the practical thing to do.

When Gentleman stole some priceless jewel, he was chased down by the police, some low-level heroes, or both. When nutjobs like The Circle showed up, they sent the big guns after them. People like Alpha Defender and Bradamante. The sort of heroes that could and would kick her ass and throw her in jail.

She’d rather have none of that.

Tristan’s footsteps echoed loudly against the marble walls as she made her way to her objective. Down here, there was more than just money. Diamonds, gold bars, important documents, and other things had all been brought here by clients who didn’t think their home safes were enough security. Gaheris would have loved it, but she could not say she cared much about such things. Her financial situation was more than stable. Adding diamonds was just being greedy.

Still, she tore a few of the safe-deposit boxes open and grabbed some diamonds and gold bars. Her nanites took on a watery quality as she pushed the items inside her suit. She didn’t care for them, but she did need to convince people they had come here to steal instead of...

By the time the warning flashed in her retina, her suit was already controlling her movements. She sidestepped to the right and turned, letting her attacker pass by at a speed nearing that of sound. The notification that appeared was one she had seen countless times already.

Exceed Detected.

He was male. Her suit estimated him to be in his mid-to-late twenties. He wore the uniform of a security guard and had a ski mask over his face.

Typical. Security companies always had a few Exceeds hidden in their payroll.

“Guess the bank paid extra for you, huh?”

He didn’t answer. His body glowed blue as he shot himself at her like a cannonball.

She dodged then raised an eyebrow when, instead of crashing into the wall like he should have, the guard ricocheted off it like a demented pinball coming at her once more.

“Oh. No. A ballistic-type power with an added ricochet effect. Whatever shall I do?” Her face was perfectly deadpan as she kept dodging his attacks, her suit easily mapping his trajectory.

Her hand lashed out.

A strangled gasp left the Exceed’s mouth as she caught him by the throat. Before he could do anything, she slammed him against the marble floor, breaking it.

“You are just an inferior Gustav.” She fired three blasts at his face at point-blank range. If he were a normal human, it would have killed him. Exceed, however, were made of sterner stuff, so the attack just knocked him out. “I fought the real thing. Do not waste my time.”

It was perhaps a little too theatrical to talk to an unconscious person, but she would have felt uncomfortable if she didn’t finish her thoughts.

With that distraction out of the way, Tristan was free to reach the end of the vault. It was, as far as most people would be able to tell, a dead end. Just a simple marble wall with no decorations. However, she knew differently. More importantly, her nanites knew differently.

As soon as she touched the wall, her nanites became linked to the system and started taking it over. The hard-light hologram faded away, revealing another vault door. She didn’t need to break this one. It opened automatically for her. The cameras had already been disabled, and she’d lock the door and put the hologram up on her way out.

No one would know she had accessed this place.

As she stepped in and found what she was looking for, she received a message from Gaheris.

[You almost done there?]

[Just finished, actually.]

[Good. Because they are here already] A pause. [Also... congratulations. It’s your boyfriend.]

Normally, she’d have told him right away that she and John were nothing of the sort. They weren’t dating. Sure, they had gone out a couple of times, but those hadn’t been date-dates. They had been… friendly outings. They didn’t like each other that way. She just… appreciated his presence and friendship. That was all there was to it.

Yes. Normally, that would be her reaction.

This time, however, she did nothing of the sort. Her lips stretched into a wide grin. Her heart skipped a beat. Perhaps a normal person would have dwelled on the inherent hypocrisy of what she was about to do, but not her.

It was just like Gaheris had said.

She was a supervillain, and supervillains were free to do whatever they wanted.

~~~

People liked to think there were pivotal moments that could forever decide the course of a person’s life. It is certainly a romantic notion, but not necessarily an accurate one. However, let us entertain the possibility. If such a thing is true, if these origin events truly exist, then where does the tale of Tristan and Gaheris begin?

Does it begin when a boy loses his father? When a girl becomes subsumed by the monotony of life?

Does it begin, perhaps, with a flyer? With a girl putting on her best blouse and skirt? With a boy renting a cheap suit that itched like crazy?

Maybe it all begins in the waiting room?

Or perhaps, it all begins a few minutes later with a pack of mints?

It probably begins with the mints.

~~~

AN:

As you may notice, this chapter is available to everyone as opposed to just Core Disciples. Yeah, since there were people from all tiers who voted for this last month, I'd have felt guilty making them wait longer, especially since this is a monthly story.

Anyway, trying out different things here. Past tense writing! Shocking, I know. Also, the obligatory in medias res prologue everyone tries out at least once.

Sidenote: Gaheris helmet looks a bit like a Great Helm minus the breathing holes. Tristan's helmet meanwhile looks more like a frog-mouth helm (Yes, that's the name).

Have a Pre-Emptive Happy New Year from me!