Episode 228 - Pac-Man Theory (ft. Karl from WATP) (Patreon)
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Welcome to Alternate Facts week on HWIDG. This week: Earth. Is it a sphere, a flat plane, a disc on the back of four giant elephants that are on an even giant-er turtle, or something else? How fast exactly are we moving in space? 10,000 MPH or not at all? How come when I spin around really fast in place I get real dizzy, but the Earth can do the same and it doesn't vomit or transform into Wonder Woman? Does gravity exist or does stuff stay down because there are so many ghosts in the air? Did we actually go to the moon or did they broadcast a deleted scene from The Shining 2: Weekend at Hallorann's instead? What doesn't the CIA want us to know about the Sun and Moon? That the Sun is the ascended soul of Pac-Man, who died for our sins by his earthly name Jesus? Or that the Moon IS made of cheese and that's where pizza was invented? Other mysteries include:
- Flat Earth
- Actor Podcasts
- Ridiculousness
Ah yes, the good ol' flat earth theory. A child was confused by pictures of the earth and the flat projection of a map and vehemently believed one must be a lie, so now thousands of people worldwide believe in a massive conspiracy theory for no reason. What would be the reason for the cover-up? Who benefits? People that make globe models? When have you even seen one of those outside of the 30 year old one in your geography class? NASA is keeping secrets? What NASA? The one that has been defunded so much that they're hoping to repeat a successful moon landing more than 50 years later? Shouldn't that just be a thing we can do now? The way anything with a screen and a processor can play DOOM these days?
If there's anyone that thinks the world revolves around them while pretending to provide a service for the good of mankind its politicians. A close runner-up though are actors. People that are paid because they are pretty and can memorize words. Sometimes they're really good at it and you say, boy they really acted the heck out of that role. But someone was there telling them exactly how to play pretend. And that role was written by someone else. And filmed by someone else. And edited by someone else. And amended with CGI by someone else. But sure, they really own that character. Please tell me more about how you read a piece of paper nicely on your podcast with your rich friends that is produced and edited by other people.
Remember MTV? Not to sound like an old fogey, but they used to actually play different things. Thought I was going to say "music videos" didn't you? I don't even care about that. But they did use to play more than one program. At this point it's the Ridiculous Channel with movie night every now and then. Some days they don't even stop. That's right, you can veg out on your couch for an entire 24 hours watching skaters get hit in the balls or people falling off homemade rope swings all while some guy and his annoying entourage jump around like chimpanzees on a trampoline.
All this and more on this week's episode! Don't forget to join us on DISCORD, and support us on PATREON or by BUYING A SHIRT!