Facing Bad Tropes with Naruko-chan 1 (Patreon)

Facing Bad Tropes with Naruko-chan - (Naruto AU, SI)

For a time, I thought I had landed in the proper and canonic land of Naruto.

You know, one of the most popular Anime/Manga shows in the previous decades, the bringer of so many memories during my years of development and… and well bad fanfictions. I still remember some of the trashy tastes I had as an edgy kid, but that was something that no longer represented me.

I just happened to wake up in Konoha Hospital after I had been found unconscious outside the village. In my PJs at that. The clothes were similar enough to normal sleepwear in the village, and I looked too ‘normal’ to be a spy so the patrol group that found me just had me checked at the local hospital.

Good news is that, despite my peculiar circumstances (an amnesiac young man that may have been kidnapped by bandits) I had been given some documentation and a place where to stay to integrate with the Hidden Village’s population. Bad news is that I was born in the wrong era.

Yes, I could see four faces on the Hokage Mountain, but this was just two years before a certain moron came to be. Namikaze Minato, the ‘Yondaime Hokage’ (Fourth Guy) was still around and kicking. Same for his wife and… no one knew he was going to have a kid despite the timeline soon blessing him with one.

Still, I had other things to worry about. I managed to get a proper certification to open a new activity in a district away from the middle of the village, away from when the Kyuubi was going to be unleashed, and where I wouldn’t be put at odds with potential competition.

Ah yes ‘Bugarino Pizzeria’ was thus born with that in mind. Be a restaurant with niche Italian food to ‘spice things’ up and also make a solid amount of money in the long-run. I may not be someone with a large menu full of alternatives, but I could cook pasta with numerous ingredients and I learned a trick or two from mother dearest when around the Kitchen.

And yes, despite my best effort to preserve my name, the Japanese here decided to butcher it to some extent. Thus, Bugarino Jonno was born. And I should have spotted this as a red flag for what was soon to come.

After all, at this stage, I was utterly convinced that this was going to go through the classic lines of canon. I was not thinking beyond that but… reality can be rather unkind to people that are not paranoid enough.

The first major flag came up around after the Kyuubi attacked the village. I was one of the first people to make it to the bunkers as the battle raged in Konoha, and I was relieved to find my activity still standing due to its location away from the battle.

When the announcement came that a Hokage had died, I thought it would have been Minato. So, I was frowning a bit when it became known that Sarutobi Hiruzen, the former Sandaime Hokage, was the one that kicked the bucket.

I was stunned by this development, but I thought ‘Oh well, it is just a small change’- and then I was hit by the second news when Minato announced that he had two children or… ‘used’ to have two but now had just one.

And I frowned even harder when I took notice of the details behind that weird news: Kushina had spawned twins- both girls. Naruko and… Mito. The former was used to house the Kyuubi’s soul and the latter was to be hailed as a hero for ‘keeping the Kyuubi’s power’ at bay.

The world was saved, not many died, the Hokage lived, and I poured myself some cold sake as my brain felt like this was the wrong kind of teasing to a wrong era of fanfic-reading. I found my head hurting, I found my mind struggling to refuse that this was reality.

This was a Neglected Naruko AU.

This was not canon- this meant that roughly more than 50% of my awareness of events was absolutely dogshit. And this meant that a kid was going to suffer hell for some hardcore brainfarting that no one would expect Minato to be able to achieve.

I don’t know if it was some sort of phenomenon where all genius just made a triple jump backward when they peaked in life, but I sure as hell took notice of this behavior worsening in two specific instances, one- everyone knew that Naruko was put in the local orphanage and people were keen to try and get there to ‘kill the Kyuubi’. The second thing was that the kid was let out in the ‘wild’ when she was four. Oh, and she had another sister who was born two years after she was born.

I doubted little Naruko was aware of this as she was a bit busy running away from villagers with murderous intent. ANBU units merely monitored her and whenever the angry crowd would rally, leaving her unguarded against individual attacks.

The child was thus always on the move and quick to distrust those around her…

All but me.

It all started when I was busy throwing out some trash. The child was peeking by the corner and she didn’t notice I had spotted her. Instead of trying to approach her or call for her, knowing that the kid was clearly going to have trust issues with adult with how her first few years of life had to have been, I muttered something about more bags to throw, but I actually went back to the kitchen to fetch a breakfast bento to then carry outside and-

“For any poor people, I am leaving some food for you all to eat. Eating from trash makes you all go sick anyway.”

After that, I went back to my living room, waited about twenty to thirty minutes, and walked out of the rear door to check if she was done. As predicted, Naruko was voracious and devoured even the crumbs as she left behind a spotless bento.

I cleaned it, and then went on to prepare one for lunch and then dinner. This went on for a week and I think that, through those days, the kid realized I was talking to her and-

“Why?”

I paused right as I had dropped out another lunch bento and I turned to see the girl now out of the corner and standing several feet from me.

“Hm? ‘Why’ what?”

“Why helping me?” She asked quietly, her childish squeaky voice reminding me that this scrawny thing was supposed to be five. “I am bad.”

“Are you?”

She nodded.

“Why?”

Naruko tilted her head. “Adults say so.”

“And that’s all you know?”

She nodded, yet appeared perplexed.

“You know?”

“I do.”

Her eyes flickered with interest. “Really?”

“I do.”

“Are you lying?”

“I am not.”

There was a pause and then she walked up to me. Not to the point of outright being within hugging range, but definitely closer.

“Why?”

I blinked, crouching down and thinking on how to drive the explanation across without being too ‘forward’ about it. But I found a rather simple way to do so. I partially lifted my shirt, enough to show my belly and I pointed a finger at it.

“When you were born, your father, with the help of the Sandaime Hokage, put a seal on you meant to turn you into the container of the Kyuubi’s soul.”

Her eyes widened in recollection. “People call me that. Am I that?”

“You’re not the Kyuubi, no.”

She tilted her head on the other side. “How do you know?”

“That’s simple. If you were that entity, you would be able to truly be evil and hurt people before they can do anything.”

“...So, I am not the Kyuubi. But then why do they think that I am that?”

“They are dumb.”

She opened her mouth-

“Like, really dumb. And grieving.”

“Grieving?” Naruko pressed on, frowning. “Why?”

“The Kyuubi was responsible for destroying and killing a good part of the village. Many people lost their lives back then and those that survived sees you as the source of that pain.”

“But I am not,” She stated with modest conviction.

“That’s the case.”

“...So why the Hokage don’t tell them I am not that?”

“Because the Hokage is a moron.”

The little kid blinked a few times and then huffed. “That’s silly.”

“It truly is.”

“But you know that’s not true.”

I nodded and smiled. “I don’t.”

…

“Thank you.”

My lips twitched at that short but meaningful comment. “You’re welcome, Naruko.”

“...I should go.”

“Do you?”

She paused, then frowned. She may have been a little girl, but her brain was still good as she realized what I meant. Then, I had my hand stretched open for her.

“I know you are not sure if you can trust me or not. But I can assure you I mean you no harm, child. You didn’t deserve the pain and… and I want you to have a good home.”

I couldn’t force her, but I would like to avoid being subjected to an edgy Naruko hating on the village, becoming the Empress/Warlady of some ‘unknown continent’ and then directing her hatred on the village itself- thus me by principle.

Plus, I really meant it that the kid didn’t deserve it and while she struggled to think on what to do, looking ready to leave, she saw the way I was looking at her and… Naruko made the last few steps and reached to hold my hand.

“Okay…”

I offered a tentative smile and I knew that this was the beginning of-

Five years later…

“DAAAAAAAADDD!!!” A certain ten year-old exclaimed from the kitchen. “I am back from the delivery service!”

I barely had the time to turn when I saw the blonde-haired bullet rush at me with a giddy smile and a huggy mood.

“Missed me?” Bugarino Ruko asked giddily as she reached for some french fries but I held her hand still by grasping her wrist.

“Obviously. Have you washed your hands?”

She flinched at my sickly-sweet tone. “N-No?”

“Then go get yourself cleaned up before dirtying the kitchen, you brat.”

‘Ruko’ pouted as she stomped towards the bathroom while I finished cooking more stuff for the shift. I shook my head, smiling as I knew that…

My little Naruko had gotten herself a nice childhood while under my roof and-.

“DAAAAAAD! Can you help me with my bra!?”

And she sure had filled up in the weirdest places possible at the ripe age of ten.

—------d-d-d-d—---

AN

Naruko - Age 10

And this is the beginning as the next two-three chapters will be set in the pre-10 Naruko’s life as she settles in with her new papa, gets accustomed to life and rekindles her giddy moods that will make Naruko… Ruko!

Starting with… the Uchiha Police!