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everything is bad (Patreon)

Published:
2020-06-25 12:45:59
Edited:
2020-06-25 12:46:32
Imported:
2021-07

Content

 This is a very depressing post, so I do not recommend reading it !!!

I hate
I don’t know why to live except how to get rid of hunger.
I don’t know how to leave, because after another small cut, I experienced wild pain from dizziness.

I’m not interested in a lot of money because whatever I buy for it, be it food, games or love. All this does not make sense when you cannot live for your own sake, like a puppet without a puppeteer ...

I used to be afraid that I would lose all my sponsors, but it became easier for me when I cut my arm for the first time. There was little blood, but dizziness hurt so much and I just lost consciousness. I realized that everything I'm worried about is stupid.

Suffering Above All.

Every day I look at the references for my porn game and they scare me, because I'm not sure that I will do a good job or be disappointed in everything. There are my old works that amaze and delight me. I ask myself. Did I draw this? because I forgot that I drew it.

Why are others painting and happy. Why can't I do this?
It amazes me that there are people who for half a year still support me, some surrender and cannot be blamed. Maybe I'm already dead ...

The problem is that not art, not money, does not make me happy. So why live. I dont know. A man is born. Man is dying. I have no one to talk to ...

I think after this post and by the end of the month there will be less cash support. And even in this I see a positive. I can get rid of excess fat on my stomach. I want to someday see a stomach press

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Comments

funny name

from nothing into nothing. once you realize it means nothing then life can really begin, because human experience is a free-for-all canvas. but the realizations are needed before anyone can really make the most of their experience, my friend. many people fall for the tricks their emotions play on their mind, your content is really stylized, fun and creative and i would be sad if you stopped.

CrazySemAn
>>39223944

you have been supporting me for a long time) I think you will be the last to leave. ahahaha. .................................................. .................................................. ... when I draw in a flash my hands begin to shake, I'm afraid that I will draw a bad job or I will have to redo the same thing 10 times. I started a new sketch and you can notice the lines that I erased. When I start remaking the same dream and dream, I get bored and get distracted again and again and again in the hope that I will find inspiration in the video or in the game and will delight my fans with cool drawings. .................................................. ................................................ my schizophrenia problem is stopping me from living. I live alone and feel unnecessary. I feel that I do not need myself ... I have a lot of ideas. I want to make games about sex and not only, but every time I start working I get bored ( I'm trying to cheer myself up with a game or video, but that doesn't help ... sometimes due to the fact that I have a split personality, I can not make a choice. To do a lot of content or to make high-quality content, because for me it is important to have both. .................................................. ................................................ when I made a game because of which everyone sponsored me was motivated by my family’s hatred of me and my hatred of her. I lived in tension, but I felt alive. I don’t know now. I have no one to love and hate is quick. .................................................. ................................................ I would talk with you, but everyone with whom I talk plunges into terrible depression and runs away from me) ahahaha) because I honestly say how I see the world and it scares them.

Anonymous

We have all fallen into a pit of despair. The pit is riddled with numerous amounts of mounds in which we can use to climb our selves out, yet the pit is deep. The challenge itself scares us into thinking its a non feasible task. You shall rise.just as others have when they have hit their lowest point.... <3

CrazySemAn
>>39231330

Schizophrenia is an undetectable disease since childhood. Brain defect. I often watched videos of people with disabilities without arms and legs who said they tried to commit suicide, but they were supported by their family and helped them live happily. I don’t have exactly the same support that my life and everything I do would make sense. The only thing that encourages me is my own hurt and hate. But it Hard

funny name

https://youtu.be/JDD12WZcosI music helps when I get to a bad mental state.