DISTRESSED DAMSELS: "We Have an EMERALD Problem," pt.1! (Patreon)

So!

I've been trying to think of something to do with the various DiD sketch sets I have kicking around that feature backup superheroine Emerald, who appears as basically a dark-haired, maskless variation on Emp's tattered-suit design (and modern-era  physique) from Empowered. Technically, the character predates Emp as a DiD commission subject by quite some time, but that's another story I'll address at a later date (well, maybe).

Anyhoo!

Recently, whilst out chugging up and down my road on my every-other-day running program—I'm up to 28 minutes outta 30 jogging so far, but we'll see if my knees hold up—my ever-mercurial muse abruptly informed me of a wacky yet strangely compelling narrative concept into which I could twist and repurpose the Emerald sketch sets. I can tell you, dear readers, that this approach to a suspiciously distress-prone superdamsel will wind up treading rather different teritory than Empowered, though conveyed via similarly heavy doses of cheesecake.

Much like some of the earlier Rose & Lily sets, this non-comic story format will feature mostly random DiD sketches slathered on with plenty of new text conveying the narrative proper, such as it is.

Let us begin!

So, yeahp, the story will be conveyed by voiceovers from supervillainous conspiracy theorist "DeathMasque," scrawled over many different Emerald sketch sets. (If this were a real comic, TBH, I would've put much more effort into giving him a more distinct "voice" than this.)

I think the set above would be "new to you," $5+ Patrons. The next page features a set that already appeared in an earlier Emerald post, now revised with narrative annotations by our villainboi DeathMasque:

Note that the "Emerald Alert" app is a solo version of Emp's SuperHomey tipline from Empowered vol.10, necessary because this superdamsel lacks any superteam affiliation (as noted above).

Another text-added revised set:

In our next Emerald installment in a week or two, DeathMasque's narration will begin giving more—and clearer—hints about the nature of the "sinister cheesecake conspiracy" he's supposedly uncovered. *Cue X-Files theme* 

Note that the true punchline underlying this narrative will take quite a while to surface, but the astute reader will no doubt catch my drift before long—and likely before the hapless DeathMasque, who will fail to grasp the full implications of his dire predicament.

Note also that these annotated sketch sets, a la Rose & Lily, are way, way too amusing to me, as they leave out allllll of the boring comic crap—which is, well, most of the comic format for me—in favor of naught but raw cheesecake and pure narration. A deadly and addictive combination for me, needless to say; well, hope you Patrons will get something outta this, even as my work schedule is periodically wrecked by these goofy indulgences.

NEXT TIME ON THIS HERE PATREON: No idea, TBH, but something should be coming up in the next M/W/F slot. Let's find out together, shall we?