The Human From a Dungeon 3 (Patreon)

Chapter 3

Nick Smith

Adventurer Level: N/A

Human - American

"What do you mean you don't want to go to college?" Cass asks.

I run my hand through her silky hair and reply, "I don't want to do anything. Not without you."

"Well, I can probably get into any school that you get into. Or we can do long distance, if you can wait for me," she says with a smile.

"Of course I can, but..." I say, trying to remember what the problem was. "Okay, yeah, I guess I'll go to college. Local, though, I don't think I can take a day without seeing you."

She smiles as she takes a sip of her coffee. We're on my porch, pretending to be adults by sipping on instant cappuccino. She takes hers with milk, almost half the cup full. I smile at her coffee flavored milk. Our eyes meet. They glow bright with life. Not like... Not like what?

"So did you pass your finals?"

"I haven't taken them yet," I say. "But don't worry, I'll pass them. The only class that will give me any trouble is..."

I trailed off as I notice the color of the sky is the same as her eyes. Not similar, the exact same. Her eyes are beautiful, but not a normal sky color. The blue is too dark for this time of day. I look around. Why is the gas station across the street? What's going on?

"Translator module functioning," she says. "Maintenance required."

"What?" I ask.

"Biology," she says. "That's the class that gives you trouble, right? Or is it anatomy and physiology?"

"Oh, it's anatomy and physiology. The school got the gym teacher to do it," I reply. "And he's bad at it."

I look around again. We're not on my porch, we're in the road?

"Hey, are we supposed to be here?" I ask.

"Of course, baby," she replies. "This is where it happens."

"Where what happens?

A thunderous crack rings out and the sky turns dark green in the blink of an eye. I panic and try to grab her hand. No-one's there. I'm alone in the middle of the road. Where did she go?

"User interface nonfunctional. Inter-dimensional energy adaptor functional. Personality matrix nonfunctional."

Where's that voice coming from? What the hell is happening?

"Nanomechanical interface nonfunctional."

"So you think he's an orc?"

My eyes snap open to see a wooden ceiling. I know this ceiling. Dammit. What was that dream? I sit up and see the two orcs staring at me. Nash and Yulk, brothers. Nash was giving me a glare of suspicion, but Yulk was looking at me eagerly. Like a child looking at Christmas presents.

"I'm not an orc," I said. "I'm a human."

"No, no I don't think you're an orc, Nick," Yulk said with a grin. "I think you might be an ancestor of the orcs!"

"What? Why would you think that?" I asked.

"Well, look at the facts! You eat what we eat, you were found in our dungeon, and we are roughly the same shape! You're a bit smaller, but that's evolution for you!"

"But I came from another world, Yulk. We don't have magic where I come from. You can't have evolved from humans unless we came from here," I said while stretching. "Also, I don't just eat what you eat. I also eat fruits and vegetables. I'll be okay if you keep giving me liver, but I'm not sure what the health effects long term will be."

There was a period of silence. Both orcs looked shocked at what I had just said. I thought we had discussed that I came from another world earlier, but thinking back I might not have made it clear. I remember telling them about trucks, but maybe I forgot to tell them we didn't have magic.

"You can eat vegetables?" Nash asked, his hand resting on his axe.

"Yeah, why?"

"The only species that can eat plants and meat that I know of is puppers," Yulk said. "Even then, they either eat meat or eat plants depending on the teeth they're born with. Everything else is either carnivorous or herbivorous."

My turn to be shocked. This can't be real, carnivores and herbivores rule this world? But the evolutionary advantage that being an omnivore grants is so massive. How did this happen?

"Yep, carnivorous or herbivorous. What do you even call something that eats both?" Nash asked.

"Omnivorous," I replied. "That's further proof that I come from another world. Being omnivorous isn't all that rare where I come from."

"Omnivorous," Yulk mumbled. "I see. All consuming. So your kind eats all the plants and animals?"

"Pretty much, but we domesticate animals and farm plants. Plus we're not voracious eaters. Well, not all of us," I said with a smile.

"I'll be damned, look at his teeth!" Nash exclaimed.

"Yes! They look like a mix of elf and orc teeth! How exciting! Maybe you're the ancestor of both elves and orcs!" Yulk said as he started bouncing.

"Except that doesn't make any sense. Evolution rarely takes a step backwards. Being an omnivore is much more advantageous that being either an herbivore or a carnivore," I pointed out.

"I don't see how," Nash said. "If you've got to eat both plants and meat, what do you do when you don't have one or the other?"

"That's a good question," Yulk said.

"We can eat either or. I can be on a meat-only diet or on a vegetable-only diet for an extended period of time," I explained. "In my world there's people... humans who don't eat meat and humans who don't eat vegetables. But they take supplements to even out their nutrients."

I chuckled to myself about the unexpected usage of my AP Health class. I hadn't known exactly what I wanted to do for a career, but I was leaning toward the medical profession. The funny thing is that my teacher posed the specific problem of being trapped in a meat-only environment or a plant-only environment as one of test essays.

"Okay, so you're fine for now but we should be looking out for plants you can eat," Nash said.

"Yes, please. Most fruits should be okay if herbivores eat them," I said. Then a thought occurred to me. "Wait, maybe not. I might end up being allergic to some of the plants here."

"Ah yes, rashes, sneezes, and diarrhea. And maybe sudden death!" Yulk exclaimed. "Don't worry, most allergies can be treated with magical healing. We've already determined that the healing works on you, so you don't have to worry about being cautious with food. Well, as long as you're near me."

Oh, that's a relief. I was trying to remember how allergy tests worked. Healing magic sounds pretty handy, I wonder if it's replaced doctors. If magic users are common and they can all do healing, probably. Hey, wait a minute...

"What do you mean you've determined that healing magic works on me?" I asked.

Yulk smiled wide and said, "It's how we..."

Nash moved faster than I'd ever seen anyone move and clasped a hand over Yulk's mouth. Yulk's eyes went wild and for a second he looked like he was going to attack Nash, but then he calmed down and nodded. Nash released his brother and looked at me.

"Don't worry about it," he said.

I was stunned for a moment, but then guessed that I shouldn't push it. They probably used healing magic on me at some point. As far as why they didn't want to admit it, I could only guess. I looked at my hand again. The scar there had shrank, I wasn't just imagining it. That's a bit of a relief.

"How common is healing magic?" I asked.

"Not very. It requires a few different things to happen for it to work properly. First, you have to be able to use magic. Not everyone can. I don't know what it's like for other races, but only about a third of our people can use it," Yulk explained. "Next, you have to be able to conceptualize what the magic does. This means that you have to be able to somehow visualize the mending process of a wound. This grants you access to the healing spell, which you can use on anything you want. Finally, you have to have enough mana for the spell to heal the wound. If not, you'll pass out."

"Wait, so if I had a broken arm you'd have to visualize my bone mending to be able to heal it?" I asked.

"No, the spell works on anything once you gain the visualization. If you can visualize the mending process on skin that will unlock the spell for you. Then you can use it on a broken arm while having no idea how the bone heals."

"There are people with large amounts of mana who can't visualize for shit," explained Nash. "They have to have it happen to them before they can create a mental picture of it, so they usually end up with physical enhancement spells and find work as warriors."

"So, the better your imagination the more powerful of a mage you can be?" I asked.

"Partly. But it's mostly your knowledge of a certain subject. For instance, if you know how fire works but don't have much imagination, you'll be able to unlock middle tier fire spells. If you have a great imagination but a limited knowledge of fire, same thing. If you have both intimate knowledge of how fire forms and a great imagination, you will unlock the highest tier of fire magic," Yulk said. "Same with any other spell."

"So I probably couldn't summon a dragon, then?"

Nash laughed and said, "You could if you made it a pet and then trained it to come when you whistle. But with magic, no."

"People have pet dragons?" I asked with a laugh.

"A couple of legendary heroes have been known to have dragon companions. There was a king about 300 years back who had a bunch of pet dragons. Got a breeding pair and helped raise the young dragons. Had something like fifteen of them," Nash replied.

"What happened to them?"

"It was seventeen, and when he died they ran amok. Destroyed his kingdom, and started in on other kingdoms before they were finally defeated. About 12 of them were killed, the rest went to live in the wilderness somewhere. They're probably still alive," Yulk answered.

"Still alive?" I asked with shock in my voice.

"Yeah, dragons don't die of old age. Or at least, nobody has ever seen it happen. There's a dragon that's been living with elves for over twelve hundred years now," Nash said. "It doesn't do much, though."

"It's been at least a hundred years since it went to sleep. The elves might have moved in after it fell asleep and built around it," Yulk said.

"No, they tamed the beast. This is known historical fact..."

I stayed silent as the brothers argued. Magic, dragons, elves and orcs. I had definitely been transported to a fantasy realm. How? That's anyone guess. Several feelings rushed through me at once. Excitement that I was in a magical new place to explore. Sadness at being away from Cass. Shame of my excitement. Setting those aside I still had many questions. The most burning one, though...

"Do you think I could learn magic?" I asked, interrupting the argument.

Silence echoed through the room. The two brothers shared a look and then turned back to me. There was a long pause before Yulk finally spoke.

"Possibly. But not now. There's things going on that demands the chief's attention, and you aren't allowed to wander until he gives you his permission to."

"You're actually deeper within our village than most non-orcs are allowed," Nash explained. "That's because you came from the dungeon. I don't know how the chief is going to approach this, and there may be a lot of legal things that he will need to decide upon. For instance, you were in the dungeon since before we orcs claimed it. Which means you might have a legal claim to the dungeon."

"I doubt that," Yulk said. "Otherwise we wouldn't have been able to enter it."

"Not necessarily. Since he was already inside, the barrier may have counted it as an open invitation sort of thing."

"If that were the case, then the rest of your party would have been teleported out when he was carried out of the dungeon. Even if that weren't the case, the rescue party wouldn't have been able to go in after them. No, it's definitely an orc dungeon."

"What do you mean by orc dungeon?" I asked. "And what's this legal claim stuff?"

"Well, you have to pay to claim a dungeon and you can claim it for either your species or your faction. Most claim dungeons for a species, because the loot changes based on who the claim is for. For instance, if you claim it for a kingdom most of the loot is going to be food or wood or things like that. Claiming for a species can grant magical items and weapons, though," Yulk explained. "Claiming for an adventuring faction grants the best loot, but then only people from that faction could use the dungeon. Which is a dangerous thing, politically. So kingdoms, which are the only ones who can afford the cost, usually claim for species."

"Yep, and the Delver's Dungeon is an orc dungeon. Probably," Nash said. "Anyway, the chief has a lot of things on his plate at the moment. So you won't be going anywhere for a while. And neither will we."

"Why did your party need to be rescued?" I asked Nash.

"We got separated. I found you instead of them. I decided to take you with me, and when I picked you up I was teleported to the dungeon entrance. We had gone a long ways inside, so I opted to carry you out and report instead of finding the others," Nash said with a hint of shame.

"So they're still trapped in the dungeon?"

"We don't know if they're trapped, or even in trouble. But it's been days, and they should have been back by now," Yulk explained. "So the chief decided to send some over-tens in after them."

"Over-tens?" I asked.

"Adventurers that are over skill level ten," Nash replied.

"Level?"

The orcs once again shared a look. Yulk shrugged.

"Even more proof you're from another world. Damn, I was hoping that you were an orc ancestor or something," he said.

"The Curaguard determines levels. When you register as an adventurer, through a church, guild, or governmental organization, a link is formed between you and the Curaguard. The Curaguard assesses your skills, spells, and strengths and assigns you a level that is shared with all participating organizations. This level determines what kind of jobs you can accept, and gives you an idea of where you stack up against other adventurers," Nash explained.

"Does the Curaguard give you skills or anything?" I asked.

"No," Yulk said. "You get skills and strength through training and practical application. You get spells through study and practice. The Curaguard just keeps track."

A soft knock at the door interrupted my interrogation of the orcs. The door opened to reveal the cute orc girl carrying another platter of food and drink. She avoided meeting eyes with me and delicately set down the new platter. As she left the room, a different sort of question came to me.

"How long was I asleep this time?" I asked.

"Two days," Nash replied.

As the revelation that I had slept for two whole days dawned on me, so did the smell of the meat. The hunger that had previously gone unnoticed suddenly announced itself in the form of my stomach growling. The two orcs chuckled as I began to eat and drink.

"The front teeth appear to be narrow at the tips to cut through food items, and the teeth next to them look like they rip apart sections of the meat quite nicely. Fascinating," Yulk said.

"Pweash dun ekshamin me wyl I eet," I said through a mouthful of liver. "Itsh embarashin."

"Don't mind me, human. I'm just trying to non-invasively determine more about your origin. Better than the alternative, I would think," the orc said with a slightly malicious smile.

I gulped down the gamey meat as the implication of what he said hit home. It hadn't occurred to me earlier, but Yulk definitely fit the profile of a mad scientist who would vivisect me if given half the chance. I didn't take very long to think of my response.

"Fine. Look but don't touch, please," I said.

Yulk frowned mockingly and Nash laughed. I picked up my drink to wash down the aftertaste of my meal as the door to the room burst open.

"Nash, the rescue party's back!" A different orc girl exclaimed. "The chief wants you to bring the human."

Nash rose from his seat on the bed opposite mine and looked down at me, suddenly serious. He tossed some clothes at me, and I caught them. A shirt and pants, again woven instead of made from hide. Not exactly medieval, but similar in style. I met his gaze.

"Get dressed, and let's go," he said.