Chapter 91: Old Yharmam (Patreon)

I was currently in my workshop as I stared at the blood gem and blood gem workshop tool in front of me next to my pimp cane. Scattered across the desk were 8 bottles of alcohol, two of them being medical rubbing alcohol.

Some may call me a drunkard but I would much rather be called a drunkard than an insaneard. Alcohol was one of the only things that helped relieve the painful headaches and the random weird noises and sights.

If somebody had actually informed me that insight was so shitty then I wouldn't have fuckin kept it. But alas I needed it with me.

I was REALLY tempted to trade all 40 of my insight for a bunch of pebbles which my insight has now informed me are eyes that are turned to stone. I needed the insight to evolve my skills and I'm sure the buyback price from these eldrich entities would scalp me.

Besides, if I was going to be fighting Health Point Lovecraft's wet dreams then I needed to be able to see them first.

Do I need to throw myself at those eldrich tickly tentacle abominations? Probably not, but knowing me I probably eventually will.

Better be safe than sorry.

I had already upgraded my Pimpus 9000 to +5 and added another weapon to my family.

The double-barreled shotgun.

Why use a measly pistol when you can pull out this sawed-off beauty of a firearm and truly prove your manhood?

I don't have to worry about ammo fitting either because it seems like this world doesn't care about how guns actually work. As long as the bullet fits inside the gun it will get shot out how it needs to be shot out.

Not that you will hear a word of complaint from me. It saves me from grinding for 9000 bullets. Not that I wouldn't, wielding a double-barrel shotgun in one hand and a sword in another while you fight off a horde of enemies is a man's dream.

I just made a slight adjustment that honestly should've come with the gun already.

Now both barrels shoot at once.

Honestly, I don't know which kind of idiot made this weapon use their barrels one after another instead of simultaneously. For trying to deny a man's dream they should get their penis privileges revoked.

After crafting that beauty up I used a dubious amount of materials to get it to +5. Now I was trying to figure out how I was supposed to "knead" a gem into a weapon.

But shortly after I got an "inspiration" on how to knead the gem into the weapon. No doubt due to the interference of insight. It is a really scary ability.

The ability to know what you aren't supposed to know. And this only at 40. Truly an ability worthy of Outer Gods. I can feel how its strains my mind.

Normally, you wouldn't see that as a problem, right? Of course, a power like that strains the mind of someone. And you are right about that, there is a problem with that though.

It strains MY mind.

Not to sound like a pretentious asshole tooting his own horn or anything but my mind is far, far stronger than normal.

Thanks to completely filling out intelligence. My intelligence is usually far beyond what a normal human can reach. After all, my mind has to keep up with my absurd physical and magical capabilities.

So even though I don't act like it(Underperforming at its finest) I am still smarter than the smartest of humans that have ever lived. My mind is capable of performing tens of calculations per second.

And this ability still strains my mind.

What would it do to the mind of a normal human is terrifying.

Anyways now my cane deals slightly more damage than before. I also had some stones left over so I enhanced my Kirkhammer a bit in case I felt like pulverizing some poor sod into cold blood.

Ignoring the creepy old man that keeps talking to himself I bid farewell to the doll and warped back to the Old Yharmam.

The moment I warped back I took a deep breath.

'Ahhh, my favorite smell. Shit mixed with burning flesh.'

The godawful smell let me get back into a fighting mindset. The smell of blood sharpened my eyes as I used body molding to tweak my body's efficiency. Cracking my neck, I had successfully put myself back in work mode.

I walked over to the big double doors. But just as I was about to open the door I saw a note hung on it.

'This town is long abandoned. Hunters not wanted here.'

I ripped off the note and burnt it electricity. As if I cared about the feelings of a note. I felt with insight that this note was a warning and disregarding it would have consequences.

But honestly?

I just don't care enough. I have a job to complete, and they can try to stop me. And I will give them one and one chance only. If they run I won't pursue them. And if they attack me...

All bets are off.

To make a show of it I ripped the door off of its hinges with an empowered kick before strolling outside. Outside the doors was a courtyard-like area with wooden crosses crucifying beasts. I heard a raspy old voice coming from far away.

"You there, Hunter! Didn't you see the warning? Turn back at once, Old Yharnam, burned and abandoned by men, is now home only to beasts. They are of no harm to those above. Turn back, or the hunter will face the hunt."

Damn, did I ask?

The only reason those beasts aren't any threat to others is because they have already killed everyone they could've been a threat to. Besides, they are beasts, there isn't a cure for beasthood. I would be the biggest hypocrite ever if I stopped slaughtering beasts just because Grandpa over here didn't want me to.

Yeah pal, tell that to the hundreds of thousands of hollows I killed. They weren't really hurting anyone either. I killed them because they were in my way.

I'm not against adding you to the list you old bat.

I saw a humanoid beast covered in bandages and fur approach me. It looked like a huntsman who had been inflicted with advanced beasthood and succumbed.

Just as it raised its claw to rip off my head I raised my shotgun and pulled the trigger.

*BANG!*

The recoil from the beast of a shotgun in my hands nearly ripped it out of my hands as it tore off the entire upper body of the beast patient. Yeah it definitely wasnt supposed to do that. I may have overdone this shotgun. Well, whatever, more gun is better gun.

I crossed over the bridge separating two buildings as another stoopid beast patient charged at me like I didn't delete over half of his brother in two bullets. This time I transformed my cane into a whip and in a display of skill, swung and wrapped the whip around its throat.

Using deadman style I hoisted the beast up by the throat before swinging it like a ball and chain then slamming it to the ground. Turning it into a fine paste. Another one tried to sneak up behind me as I did this but I pulverized its ribcage with a kick. The next two I grabbed by the neck before slamming them into the ground while giving them their daily recommended dose of electricity.

I moved one, going down the stairs I saw a horde of beast patients rushing at me, taking stance I electrified my whip and swung at extreme speeds, lashing several beasts at once. With every swing of my whip, limbs would fly. As I was taking care of them I heard the voice once more.

"You are a skilled hunter, adept, merciless... half-cut with blood, as the best hunters are. Which is why I must stop you... I should think you still have dreams, well the next time you dream... give some thought, to the hunt."

Hearing that, with a heavy blow I finished off the horde of beasts just in time to hear the revving of a Gatling gun. I immediately turned my head to the source of the noise.

On top of the Clocktower, I saw an old man revving up a machine gun.

Aimed at me.

You are fucking dead.

I saw a hail of bullets emerge from the barrel of the gun coming at me.

'{Total Concentration}, {Beast Transformation}, {Full Potential}.'

I felt like the time around me ground to a halt as I shot forward like a bullet. Evading bullets by going in a zig-zag pattern. Whatever stray bullet reached me got cut in half by my blade. My body moved at inhuman speeds, almost as fast as the bullets aimed at me.

I moved on all fours, climbed on terrain, and jumped from building to building as I evaded machine gunfire.  And the moment that fucking gun ran out of bullets I dashed out like a shadow toward the clocktower. Basically flying through the air and just as he managed to get his magazine back in the gun I climbed my way up and delivered a kick to the head that guarded against.

But it still made him skid across the floor. I also felt his arm creak under the blow. But now that he was away from that damn gun I greeted him. I wanted answers.

"Hello There!"