December status and January pause (Patreon)

Hey all. Thought it important to give an idea of where things are and what's to come. Looking at this month I can't say I've done anywhere near my best or put in the proper effort and it is, in a word, disappointing. Most days this month I can't say I've been taking the time to create what I expected and what I promised you all I would. My efforts have been erratic, to say the least, and its certainly not fair to have things go so poorly yet again.

There's been nothing but kindness and support that's poured in from so many, whether here, or twitter, or discord, and I know I haven't delivered and made right by everyone. Don't get me wrong, I always want to do so; it's not my intention to disappoint or have folks feel unhappy. I hate the thought of letting anyone down but I can't deny that's exactly what has been occurring here for a little while. 

So, first things first: I will be pausing the next month (and possibly February, but we'll see). I will also be unpublishing the $5 tier for now. It's clear the work here and the work ethic haven't been justifying the ask. I hope, in time, I can. But for now I think it's best to unpublish it. That doesn't mean I'm removing the tier completely; anyone currently on the tier will remain. It just means anyone who comes by in the meantime won't be able to sign up for that tier. (Despite a patreon being paused folks can still sign up.)

I know this wasn't the news anyone was looking for in what has been undoubtedly a rough year. It isn't something I'm happy to be writing. But I want to do and make right where and when I can and that means I cannot ask for or accept support I have not quite earned. I hope I'll earn it sometime but for now, I ask that folks not provide any further financial help and I hope the reasoning behind it will be understood and respected.

Does this mean I will not be posting anything here for the time being? No, I still have work I want to show. I hope to have that for you soon. And hopefully as things progress I can keep posting more things you all may like and that I'm truly happy with and excited to create. Speaking more openly, the better I feel the more productive I tend to be as GF. Things have been.. uneven with respect to mental health. Hopefully that can move in a better direction over the coming months.

Thanks for being here. Right now I can't say I deserve the support and care but I truly hope I can earn it.

In the meantime stay safe out there, and be kind to yourselves and others.

-GF

TL;DR: Disappointing month; so I'll be pausing for January and maybe Feb; but work will continue as much as possible.