The Simulacrum - Chapter 106 - Part 3 (Patreon)

"{I will not, young knight!}" the sword in my hand protested, but I ignored their voice in my head and assumed a defensive posture.

Based on the blowing, swirling magical lights around the stupid old bastard, I had a feeling he wasn't kidding, a notion that was further attested by the soft warning my sixth sense was continuously sending me. It didn't warn me of any immediate danger, but it was consistently keeping me on edge, and my whole body tensed up in preparation for what was to come.

Of course, that presumed that I would play by the arch-mage's rules, and as always, I still had the option to Phase away and pretend it was all some kind of illusion and I was never really—

"So this is indeed your real body. It is quite a relief. For a short moment, I was dreading to appear foolish, but it appears it was a gamble worth taking."

"What?" I blurted out in response, and Lord Grandpa spread his hands, accompanied by one of the most punchable smiles I'd ever seen on a face, which meant…

"Cal? Did you stop the circulation?"

"{Worry not, young knight! I have already stopped all unnecessary activities and prepared your body for combat! There's no need to thank me.}"

I had many a colorful comment I could've given in response to that, but then my danger sense suddenly flared up, and my upper body automatically leaned to the side. Not a blink of an eye later, a crescent-shaped wave of blue light sailed past where my left shoulder was just a moment ago, hitting the wall far behind me and gauging a sizable gash into the concrete.

"It was about half as powerful as the formula would have dictated. More or less as expected," the smug old man muttered as he let his hand down, his two extended fingers still flickering with magical light. "As you can see, the proximity of the Nexus affects the stability of my spells just as much as it hampers your ability to cast your illusions. I reckon we can call that a fair handicap."

"Fair my ass!" I exclaimed and pointed at the cut on the wall. "You could've taken my bleeding arm off with that!"

"But I did not," Lord Grandpa responded with the same self-assured smile and floated a little higher. "I was confident you would easily avoid a spell with such a straightforward trajectory. The real demonstration begins now."

After pausing, he rapidly chanted a string of syllables that sounded something like 'slublakrluflubbus', and after another eye-sore of a light show, a large, gnarled staff with golden inlays and a fist-sized blue orb embedded into its head materialized out of thin air and landed in the man's outstretched hand. He hefted his new weapon, as if familiarizing himself with a weight he hadn't felt in a while, and then pointed it at me.

"There is no need for concerns. I promise I will be reasonable, so use this opportunity to carve the experience of facing an arch-mage of the Assembly into your mind and bones without any reservations!"

"Bullshit!" I blurted out, though the last syllable was overpowered by the roar of a cloud of flame surging out of the ball on the tip of the staff.

"{It's a spell that affects a wide area! Avoid it, young knight!}" I didn't have time to complain about useless advice, as I was too busy trying to suppress my instinctive reaction to just Phase out of the way. Lacking a better solution, I dived to the left, barely avoiding the flames scorching the spot where I stood. "{Well done! Fret not, for I shall continue to offer my guidance, and confer the wisdom I have accumulated over the centuries to you, so you can face this mighty foe! This is the reason for my existence!}"

Cal was unusually hyped up by the situation, and a small corner of my mind wondered if he was getting high on the dense mana in the room. Fortunately, the larger part of my mind had its priorities straight and focused on analyzing the situation while leaving my survival in the hands of my trusty dodging reflexes and danger sense.

Ducking under another burst of flames, I considered the first question: how much of my powers could I reveal in this situation? Lord Grandpa already implied that I shouldn't be able to use illusions, my go-to-excuse to explain my teleportation shenanigans to the uninitiated onlookers, and he sounded damn sure about himself. It apparently had something to do with the Nexus under our feet, and while I didn't fully understand what was going on, I had an inkling that if I tried to pull the 'I was never really here' card at this point, it would retroactively undermine every previous occasion I blamed on illusions.

I not only used that explanation with Lord Grandpa, but Jaakobah as well, and since I was still in the process of fully separating myself from my Bel persona, the last thing I needed was to get the arch-mage suspicious about my powers and start tugging at the frayed edges of my cover. Of course, this consideration didn't take precedence over my life, but so far, the old man was only throwing fairly predictable moves at me, so it was fine.

The next issue was my mobility. Since I didn't plan for combat and didn't bring any defensive gear, it meant I had to keep my head over the water with sheer agility. Unfortunately, that was easier said than done when I was wearing a pair of street leather shoes that weren't exactly designed for high-octane footwork.

"{Look out, young knight! Your foe is preparing for a grand spell!}"

"I can see that already!" I growled back and assumed a high guard stance.

"{The Magi is still chanting his spell! By attacking him now, you could interrupt his channeling, and open him up for follow-up attacks!}"

"I never asked for a tutorial!"

Even putting that aside, Cal's comment was kind of moot, considering at this point Lord Grandpa was hovering more than three meters high in the air, his head nearly touching the ceiling. At best, I could maybe poke the soles of his feet! Phasing could've solved that issue, but then again, it was off the table for the moment. What else did I have?

"Ah, right. Phantom Limbs," I muttered under my breath. I was so startled by the sudden development, I nearly forgot about them.

"{Quickly, young knight! Use the beam attack to interrupt him before it's too late!}"

Putting aside the fact that I had no such ability, I had more important things to think about, so I refrained from responding and instead focused on how to use my Phantom Limbs in this situation. While I could've just flailed them around, like normal, and cut all incoming spells into ribbons, I had no idea how to explain what I was doing to Lord Grandpa afterward, which brought me back to the previous 'don't raise suspicion'point.

Turning that around, how could I use them while still looking natural, and something a famous Chimera Slaying King of Knights and Dragons and Whatever Else could reasonably use? I didn't have to think long, and I managed to extend my two intangible limbs in parallel to Cal's blade, just in time for the old bastard to release whatever big spell he was weaving.

In but a second, the air in the room dropped by at least a dozen degrees. Behind the floating man's back, a dozen or so bright blue magical circles materialized from nothing, and they had a bunch of large icicles growing from their centers. Seeing those brought a small trauma from the not-so-distant past to mind, but it was only a fleeting sensation, and by the time the bloody things started flying, I already reaffirmed my grip on Cal.

The torrent of icy projectiles came at me all at once, but despite how dangerous it looked, my danger sense was only giving me a medium-grade forewarning. The reason was simple: this spell apparently worked on a shotgun principle, firing a whole lot of missiles in a broad area, making avoiding them all nearly impossible. However, in the reverse, it also meant that so long as I didn't panic and remained still, I only had to strike down a handful of ice spikes coming my way, and that's exactly what I did.

While I didn't have the full boost my armor set provided, combining Cal's support with my own sixth sense made the process relatively simple. The first wave of icy projectiles only had three that would've hit me if I didn't hit them first, and while I wasn't sure I could've done it with just the sword alone, the moment my Phantom Limbs touched them, the frozen missiles lost all their momentum, making swatting them out of the air even easier. The second wave had six icicles that would've hit me, and I cut down five one after the other before getting out of the way of the last one, and then the last wave, which looked way bigger than the first two combined, somehow only had four dangerous ice-bolts in it.

All in all, defending myself from the barrage felt almost like I was playing some kind of rhythm game, and not even a particularly hard one. Of course, that didn't mean I came out of it scot-free; while I avoided all the attacks that could've caused injuries, I had to ignore a few grazing hits, and while they didn't draw blood, they left a few bruises on my legs and side. More alarmingly, since I didn't have my full suite of physical enchantments, deflecting just a handful of those icicles left my hands sore, to the point where I was worried that if there were a few more of those barrages, my grip could've slipped.

Luckily for me, by the looks of it, that spell took a lot out of Lord Grandpa, as he not only didn't launch another salvo, but he even descended a little closer to the ground. That was something that didn't avoid Cal's notice either, and they sounded downright excited by the situation.

"{Amazing display, young knight! While you had failed to interrupt the Magi's spell, you have done well to weather his attack! Truly commendable! Now, strike him down while he's disoriented! Attack him with your beam attack for massive damage!}"

"I still don't have anything like that, and he's not a giant enemy crab!" the indignation burst out of me, and it finally took the overly enthusiastic sword aback for a moment.

"{No, of course not. He's an arch-mage of the Magi. I thought you already knew."} If glares could hurt, the annoying sword would've been screaming under mine, but they were apparently incapable of self-reflection, and continued on anyway. "{I understand that the weight of the situation might have caused you to make such a mistake, but I will not judge you for it. While the chances of victory are slim, as defeating a Lord of Magic within his own domain is a monumental task scarcely likely to ever succeed, you must never give up! So long as the power of determination blazes in your heart, there's no—}"

Ignoring the incessant and unwelcome pep-talk coming my way, I heeded my sixth sense's warning and sidestepped to the left, avoiding another of those crescent-shaped waves coming my way. On this occasion, however, the old man didn't stop at one, and while rapidly chanting, he chained one attack after the other.

This time, I didn't dodge, but instead I lashed out with the sword in my hand, if only to shut them up for a moment, and parried each incoming wave as they came. It kind of felt like we were long-range sparring, except since this time the projectiles weren't corporeal, there was little to no impact on my hands after contact with my Phantom Limbs instantly canceled the crescents out. It still resulted in lots of clanging noises and a whole lot of magical lights, but at this point, I was used to the useless spectacle.

After he finished his combo, the old man rose back into the air and floated back while simultaneously releasing a large ball of fire my way. When it covered about half the distance between us, it abruptly morphed into an angry face, which was made slightly funny when I sliced it in two vertically. To my surprise, it turned out that Lord Grandpa used the cover of the fire-head-thing to fly even further back than I thought, and he already released a barrage of pointy red missiles at me. They flew in curved trajectories, and while I could swat out the first few of them, I simply couldn't move my hands fast enough to take care of it all, forcing me to start moving while simultaneously parrying the incoming magic missiles.

This barrage barely even ended when I noticed that the old man was casing another spell, and in a moment, a couple dozen dinner-plate-sized magic circles materialized all around me, creating a whole bunch of fiery pillars that raised the ambient temperature right back up after the ice barrage. Then, to make things even worse, the fire columns started moving around in eclectic, spiraling patterns.

"{Look out! The Magi is channeling his spell again! If you interrupt him now—}"

"Seriously, is this a video game boss fight?! How many more stages are there?!"

"{Focus, young knight! This obviously isn't a game! This is reality!}"

Once again, I had a colorful expletive on the tip of my tongue, but I had to ignore it in favor of the fire pillars swirling around me. Dodging them wasn't too difficult, but it was very tiring, and since I still had no idea how I was supposed to beat the old man while keeping all my trump cards close to my chest, I wanted to preserve as much as my stamina as possible, so…

…

Wait.

Was I supposed to win here? I thought I was joking (it was my coping mechanism, bite me), but wasn't this pretty much one of those 'unwinnable RPG battle' scenarios my redhead sister occasionally complained about while playing on her phone? Here I was, alone and unprepared, facing off against one of the (allegedly) most powerful people on the island, inside his lair, where he had an infinite supply of magic and he kept throwing spells at me like it was candy on Halloween night. Could it be that I wasn't actually supposed to win this, but serve as one of those 'learning experiences', where the hero would have to face the fact that there are much more powerful foes out there, and motivate them to train harder or something? Or was I conflating that with a shounen manga cliché?

In either case, this might be a Narrative-directed event aimed at me, and I wasn't half happy about it. The question was, how should I deal with it?

If my memory serves right, I might've read on the trope site that if the hopeless boss fight was scripted enough, then even if the player won the battle, the scenario would still continue like they had a massive defeat. While I was half-tempted to break my rules, Phase up to Lord Grandpa, and paddle him into a pulp with the flat of Cal's blade, just to see if he would then act like he squarely defeated me once he regained consciousness, I figured that satisfying my bile curiosity should take a lower priority in this situation.

What else then? Well, in the RPG that Penny was playing (despite constantly complaining about it while lounging on the couch in the living room), she got annoyed because an unpopular side-character had to come in and save the party multiple times, just to show off how great she was and how big her boobs were. Her words, not mine.

That more or less fell in line with what I knew about these hopeless boss fights: you either had to lose, or you won, but the game still pretended you lost, or after surviving for some time, a supporting character would show up to save your skin. The first option obviously wasn't going to happen, because there was no way in hell I would pretend to lose to this annoying old codger, while the second option was also out of the question. I mean, I technically could win, or at the very least make the bloody wizened bastard regret he ever came up with this idea, but there were long-term consequences to consider, and I wasn't sure that beating up the local arch-mage just before the Assembly was about to come to the neighborhood to pick a fight was a good idea.

That left me with only option three, which meant… stalling for time.

"So, just keep doing what I've been doing up until now, huh?" I muttered under my breath between cutting off one of the heads of the large nine-headed water snake the old man summoned.

"{No, young knight! I told you, you must interrupt the channeling!}"

"Cut it out, will you?"

Cal huffed and puffed, but I was too busy with beheading the liquid creature in front of me to care, and just as I got rid of the fifth head, it dissolved into purple mist, which was soon carried away by a large, localized whirlwind that enclosed me while the arch-mage kept throwing yellow lightning bolts at me. I had no idea whether those were real or not, but last I checked, swords were conductive, so I opted for dodging them instead of blocking. Luckily, unlike real lighting, these were pretty slow, so I had to pay more attention to not getting caught up in the purple whirlwind than those.

Like that, we went through all the elements one by one. After lightning, it was a big rock conjured up from the floor, then dozens of whips made of water, followed by a small blizzard combined with metal spikes exploding up from the ground, and then it was back to fireballs and those crescent-shaped magical attacks.

While certainly stressful, things were still relatively manageable. What I could, I cut. What I couldn't, I dodged. It was by no means easy, but nothing was as dangerous as the first icicle barrage. I had bad compatibility with those, it seemed.

Then, just as I was about to get worried that my hunch was wrong, and I would have to keep up this song-and-dance routine until the old man got bored, we were both startled by all the colors suddenly getting reversed for a split second. During that time, the ravaged purple room disappeared, only to be replaced by its pristine realspace version, and before we could even say a word, the only door leading into the chamber was forcefully torn off its hinges by a pair of ethereal hands.

However, I didn't even have time to exhale a sigh of relief over my bet paying off when no less than four other disembodied glowing hands flew into the room and grabbed me. My danger sense didn't warn me, so I was taken by surprise, which soon manifested in a yelp when I was yanked through the door and into the corridor outside.

"Oh gosh! Leonard! Are you, like, injured? Quick, let me see you!"

Before I even landed, a certain youthful ex-arch-mage was already running in circles around me like a panicked mother hen.

"Saahira? What is the meaning of this?" Lord Grandpa raised his voice as he walked through the ruined doorway, finally deciding to join us on the ground. Speaking of which, Sahi's hands finally let me go and I nearly toppled over by the suddenness of it all. Thankfully, Pascal was also nearby, and he helped me steady myself. Beforehand, the adrenaline kept me going, but now that it was over, I suddenly realized that I was heaving and sweating like a horse.

Anyhow, before I could thank him, my attention was yanked over to the brown girl. She was currently dressed in a hodgepodge of casualwear and only wearing one slipper, and she was raising her voice while thunderously glaring at the old man under the eaves.

"Oh, don't you 'what's the meaning of this?'me! Like, are you totally out of your mind?!"

"No, I assure you I am not. More importantly, what are you doing here?"

"Like, what do you think? Paz called me on the phone and told me everything!"

"Pascal?" the old man questioned his protégé, but he stubbornly refused to look his way and pretended to inspect my nonexistent wounds. I, for one, was more curious about how he even got a phone signal here, but then again, it wouldn't be the first time Critias's mobile phone network was more mystical than actual magic.

"Hey! Your eyes, over here!" Sahi waved her hand in front of the arch-mage's face, and two of the ethereal hands mimicked the gesture behind her. "I'm, like, still talking to you! What were you thinking endangering our golden goose like that!?"

"Your true thoughts are leaking out," Pascal noted blandly on the side, still not looking up from me, and the brown girl rolled her eyes in return.

"Like, Leonard isn't small-minded enough to care about something like that, right?" Before I could get a word in, she immediately continued with, "Of course I'm right! So, like, are you going to explain yourself any time soon?"

"I simply demonstrated the power an arch-mage wields to our young friend, so that he would understand the full scope of the current situation. You could consider this but a form of guidance."

"Bogus! I could totally feel the mana veins shaking! You were totally trying to kill him!"

"No, I have not, though I admit had to show much less restraint than I had originally planned." Pausing, he turned to me, and tapped the butt of his staff against the floor, as if pondering what to say next. "I must say, you have handled yourself admirably. The skill you had demonstrated certainly proves that your reputation is not ill-deserved. However, I must warn you against considering this a victory. What you had witnessed was but the power of a single arch-mage, dampened by the proximity of the Nexus, and while you certainly thwarted my attempts at cornering you, you could not even raise a finger against me in return. Remember that a conflict with the Assembly would mean facing several Magi with powers similar to mine at once."

This was yet another of those 'I-don't-know-if-I-should-laugh-or-cry' kind of situations, and while I was really, really tempted to go through with that whole paddling-idea all over again, my better judgment managed to keep me in line. I promised Ammy that I would play nice and not antagonize the elderly son-of-a-bitch more than strictly necessary, so I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"Yes, yes. You're veeery scary. I'm still shaking in my tiny little boots," I grumbled and rolled my shoulders before turning to each person in the hallway, one after the other. "Pascal, thanks for taking the initiative to call her. Sahi, thanks for the intervention. Old bastard," I paused here, and theatrically sheathed Cal before uttering, "I hope you're aware that, one of these days, I'm absolutely going to get you back for this. Not today though. I'm exhausted, I need a shower, and I'm already tired of looking at your annoying mug in general, so I already went home while you were talking. In other words… bye."

And then, punctuated by a wave of my hand, I Phased right back home. It was the only way I could think I could get the last word in, but I also wasn't kidding about the things I said. My clothes were both tattered, singed, and drenched in sweat, and my feet felt like they were on fire, so I absolutely needed that shower and some rest.

"{It was a wonderful display, young knight! While I am somewhat disappointed that you did not follow my instructions, the way you held out until the bitter end was truly admirable!}"

"Yeah, sure," I answered on autopilot while making my way up the stairs, and as usual, Cal wasn't able to read the mood at all.

"{Do not feel down! This battle might have ended with a tie, but you still have room to grow, while that Magi is past his prime! So long as you do not let your fire die out and train diligently, I can promise you that next time, we shall be victorious!"

"Yeah, sure."

Still not getting a clue, Cal started blabbering about training routines and mastering my beam attack (whatever the hell that was), but I tuned them out because something else caught my ear. As I walked past my sisters' room, I was startled by a pained hiss, followed by a strange moan.

"Ow! I told you to be gentle!" Penny whined from behind the closed door, followed by my other sister apologizing.

"S-Sorry! I didn't mean to hurt you, but this is the first time I do this with a girl, so I'm inexperienced…"

"Ah… D-Don't worry. We can take it slow and… erm… keep experimenting until you know how to do it right."

"Are you sure? I might end up hurting you again?"

"That was just a scratch! Don't worry about it, I can endure it. Also… when you started doing it, it actually felt warm and a little good, and—"

My patience lasted this long until I couldn't bear it any longer and knocked on the door.

"Hey, you two. Keep the innuendos to a minimum, would you?"

After a momentary beat, Snowy answered first.

"Leo? I didn't think you would be home so early."

"Well, me neither, but I had a sparring match against Lord Grandpa, and now I'm in dire need of a change of clothes and a—"

Before I could finish, there was a thump on the other side of the door, and it was soon thrown open, with my abyssal sister looking quite panicked.

"Wait! Close the door! Close the door!" my other sister whined on the bed. She was lying face down, without wearing anything from the waist up, and yet instead of covering up her back, which had a network of softly glowing lines on it, she grabbed a pillow and buried her head under it.

In the meantime, my other sister got even more worked up, probably due to my tattered appearance, so I ignored the redhead on the bed and turned to her again.

"Easy there, sis. It looks worse than it is."

"You always say that!" she complained and patted me down, starting from the shoulders. "Are you injured anywhere? Do you need bandaging? Or should I call Angie?"

"What? What's going on out there?" Penny's muffled voice asked from under the pillow, but we both disregarded her.

"No, I'm really fine," I told her, but since she still looked concerned, I decided to divert her attention by asking, "Say, what were you two doing?"

"Oh, that?" Suddenly going from fretful to awkward, Snowy put her hands behind her back and sheepishly told me, "Penny said I could practice drawing Sigils on humans on her. It's… harder than I thought."

"Figures," I murmured under my breath and gestured toward the bed. "Well, don't keep her waiting then, or at this rate, she'll suffocate herself with that pillow."

"Brother, you jerk!" my knightly sister yelled at me, only to bury her face back under the pillow again.

"You're right," Snowy relented, but then she recalled something and waved a finger at me. "If you need help, call me anyway, or I'll tell Judy."

"… Are you threatening me with my girlfriend?"

"I'll call Elly too!"

"… Point taken."

She hummed, satisfied, and then finally closed the door and returned to their experimentation or whatever. In the meantime, I decided to head to the bathroom right away, and on my way there, the previously silent sword hanging on my side suddenly spoke up again.

"{It is quite heartwarming to see how close your sisters are, isn't it, young knight? I believe the excursion to the inn with the hot water springs was a great opportunity to deepen their familial love and friendship.}"

"Nothing gets past you, huh?"

"{Why, thank you. As a matter of fact, I do take pride in my observation skills. Why, just the other day…}"

"Yeah, sure," I muttered and continued to undress while listening to Cal's humblebragging. Honestly, while I had little problem with them until now, on this day I felt like I finally began to understand why they were stuck in that stone.