Life Update: I'll be alright. (Patreon)

Boops~ Hi…

I spoke with the Distractible Doctor today. And before you say anything, I know she’s not the brightest bulb, but she does know a thing or two about self-care. And it turns out I haven’t been doing a good job.

“Skitty, you should practice what you preach! Tsk tsk.”

I worked my IRL job throughout quarantine, business as usual with an extra sprinkle of stress. Under pressure became my norm. Poor sleep became my norm. Isolation became everyone’s new norm. But I went with the flow. Now that the world is slowly starting to re-open, my brain has taken a pause to reflect... “WTF has happened?”

I work 40h+ hour weeks between my career and audio. Thanks to my supporters, I’ve been able to focus more on my passion: audios (and you!). I am still going to work though, probably always will, but it’s a lot easier now.

Still, there never seems to be enough hours. Gone are the days when I could record an audio on the fly. Producing an audio takes hours if not days because they’re heavily scrutinized before release. I record, edit, and sometimes write my own scripts. Each audio is then beta’d and checked by its respective writer. It’s a whole process. But before it even starts… I need to be in the right emotional state of mind.

I think you can hear when a roleplay sounds like a teleprompter reading; it’s not great. I love diving into scripts and living the fantasy, and I hope that’s reflected in a more positive and honest audio experience. However, when I’m under the weather, it feels disingenuous to play happy or sexy characters. And that’s where I’ve been floating this past month. I have scripts ready, yet I can’t seem to find myself. The most recent friends-to-lover audio is probably the closest thing I’ve been able to emotionally connect with.

I know I’m a happy person. I know this is not depression. A friend recently shared some song lyrics that summarizes my current mood…

“I know I’ll be alright, but I’m not tonight” - Finneas 

I've lost someone I once respected.
I feel guilty for not meeting expectations.
I am a sleepless server mom of three thousand.
I feel exhausted caring for people.
I feel smothered by friends who mean well.
But I’ll be alright. I promise.

I’ll be alright because this community means too much to me. Every message I receive, I read them. And I’m forever grateful for those who’ve allowed me into their lives... this weird silly girl. So thank you.

I’m not going anywhere, I might just be a little quieter until my mood perks up. I’m sorry if my audios might take a little longer to produce, but I want them to be just right.

I’ve turned off comments on Reddit, because I know I’ll feel compelled to reply. I may not reply to messages this week.

I’m not good at taking breaks. I’ll probably end up working despite telling myself I shouldn’t. But I’ll try. And I hope you all take a moment to breathe as well. *big hugs* ⊂(・﹏・⊂)

On a lighter note, here are things you can look forward to:

• There is a collab in the pipeline with a prominent YouTube VA.
• My Skitty persona will be getting a makeover. I’ll share designs once the artist is ready. People keep asking for VTuber Skitty. While I don’t see myself as a live streamer, a model could be a cool tool for my YT content. No promises. If I like the new design, I’ll start searching for an artist/rigger.
• The nsfw yandere hypnosis audio is in limbo until I find my writing mojo again.
• Wholesome giantess girlfriend was something I wanted to do ages ago. I’ll try to tackle her story again.
• When sexy mood returns, I’ll have a daddy x kitten script ready for reading.

Much love,
Skitty