Another Thank You to my Patrons, and Some Creative Woes (Patreon)

Hey everyone, not to sound like a broken record, but I really do appreciate your continued support, it means the world to me. Patreon isn't just a fun little side project for me, it's the platform that I want to be able to actually support me one day in the future. I am going to keep giving it my all, improving, and trying to cater more to what everyone would most like to see. (Or as close as possible, not sure I can keep everyone the most happy at all times!)

Today I learned that a third party site has been reposting all of my premium Patreon content for free, (though they welcome donations ofc) and it breaks my heart a little. I understand that this is the internet, and once something is posted, ownership of that thing is tenuous at best. But it still hurts. The damage to creators is two-fold: Anyone who makes the decision to enjoy the content for free rather than pay a modest fee for it is directly affecting that creator's potentially sole source of income. At best, that creator has enough subscribers that it doesn't harm them too much, (I am def. not there yet) and at worst it stems so much of the earnings that having a Patreon page is too much effort for not enough return. 

The second kind of damage is the emotional variety, a little harder to quantify. I work hard at this nearly every day, although I try to take most of my weekends off to spend time with my husband/friends. Finding out about this today (my birthday of all days, ah how the knife twists) has really taken some of the wind out of my sails creatively. Feeling like I have no agency over my own work, when pieces from here make their way to public sites sucks. It makes me wonder if I made the right choice leaving my job to pursue this full time, if I'm good enough, if all of my time and effort really matters at all when at any moment everyone could just drop their support and find my content elsewhere for free. *deep sigh*

At the end of the day, it might be easier for me to give up, shut this page down, admit I'm not good enough and go get another full-time job I hate, and let the people who take and repost without asking for their own profit win. But I'd hate myself for giving up, and that's not who I am. I'll persevere, as long as I'm able, until I can either make enough money at this to pay my bills and become sustainable, or until I have no choice but to do something else. I want to draw, I want to create, I want to continue to connect with you folks who make this journey possible. Today I took a hard blow to my sense of purpose, but it's not something I can't ultimately overcome.

I'm letting you all know this, not because I want sympathy, but because it's a real thing that affects me and my Patreon negatively. As I've said before, I want to be transparent with you all every step of this process, even during the unexpected ones. The fact that the majority of you continue to show me with each passing month that you enjoy my work enough to provide financial support is overwhelming, and even when I feel a bit sorry for myself, it's you guys who make me dust myself off and get back to work. Thank you again, sincerely.

-D.B.