EoD P2: 2074 Q1 Results (Patreon)

[X] Plan: Dipping Our Toes

-[X] SECURITY (1 dice; +0)

--[X] 1 die: K-9 Kennel (0/75 --> 28/75)

-[X] AGENT (1 dice; +0)

--[X] 1 die: Northern Atchafalaya Chemical Dumping Investigation (0/50 --> 61/50) COMPLETE

--[X] 1 Skulder: The Sunken Parish (0/250 --> 17/250)

-[X] FACILITIES (0 dice; +0)

--[X] 1 Benoit: Fortified House of Worship (0/200 --> 25/200)

---[X] Baton Rouge

-[X] SCIENCE (1 dice; +5)

--[X] 1 die + 1 Edgar: Construct CERES Unit (0/150 --> 91/150)

---[X] New Alexandria

--[X] 2 Edgar: Gorilla DNA Library (0/250 --> 128/250)

--[X] 1 Edgar: Atomicrops Research Notes (0/100 --> 57/100)

-[X] OUTREACH (0 dice; +0)

--[X] 2 Wilbur: Community Broadcast Tower (0/200 --> 136/200)

___________________________________

K-9 Kennel [Personnel, Ecology]: A K-9 Kennel: it would allow the DoP in the region to begin training its own K-9 units rather than importing them from the training facility in Montana. 28/75, headquarters gains K-9 Kennel, allowing for the creation of K-9 Teams in regional communities.

Construction begins on an expansion to headquarters: a K-9 Kennel intended to help train dogs for your security teams as well as help train security teams in the correct use of dogs. Progress is slow, however, due to bureaucratic issues: namely, it takes most of the quarter to successfully purchase the plot of land. 

The street has numerous unoccupied buildings. Unfortunately, those buildings aren’t unowned, and while its not particularly difficult to convince the landlords to part with a building they weren’t making any income on other than tax breaks, someone at city hall would, OVER EIGHTEEN TIMES, lose the ownership transfer paperwork. 

You’d assume malice, but the reality was it was probably just incompetence: the issue only resolved itself once you extremely publicly confronted the city mayor whilst having lunch. The whole debacle ended with city hall finally sorting out the paper-work issue, a public apology from the mayor, and the Department agreeing to pay for the reconstructive surgery for the blown out ear-drums for the twenty one people, including the mayor, who were in the room while you politely explained the problem. 

Still, ground is broken. Progress is being made. You obviously can’t take much pleasure in it, considering what the dogs are likely to be used for, but out of all your options, additional K-9 units are probably the least terrible way you could expand security. 

The Sunken Parish [Investigation, Weird]: The super hurricanes had caused significant portions of the state to sink in the past five decades or so. Recently, fishermen looking to catch their dinner in the shallow, watery plains that rested on formerly dry land had reported their boat being attacked by figures in what appeared to be diving suits. 17/250, gain the Sunken Parish Community Card.

March 2nd, 2074

“New boss has us investigating reports of fishermen getting attacked in the region that used to be the St. Mary Parish: the place has been underwater for damn near twenty years since the Flood of 56. Past five years, however, people have been coming back from the place with injuries: bites, claw marks, bruises. A few say they were nearly drowned: that’s the people who come back. The ones who don’t come back probably wind up gator food.

No great loss, considering most of them are the dregs of society. 

Apparently, the attacks only happen at night: victims- largely drunken creoles without a fishing license- report creatures that resemble living corpses crawling onto their boat and trying to drag them under. 

Sounds like Centralia Zombies. Dunno how they got there. Bigger question is why the boss cares about a bunch of mixed race hicks going missing: ‘black person dies doing something stupid’ isn’t news, its tuesday. Still, I’m going to go ahead and call this case closed: the boss will probably be satisfied with the ruling of zombie and issue a travel advisory for the area.”

Northern Atchafalaya Chemical Dumping Investigation [Investigation, EPA]: Someone has been dumping toxic waste in the Northern Atchafalaya and making local communities sick. This had to stop, and the perpetrator had to be brought to justice. 61/50, gain Gecko Community Card. Immense Wrath Gain.

“The fuck do you mean we can’t do anything?” You growled over the phone.

“I mean we can’t do anything,” Clancy said neutrally in that ‘we’ve tried nothing and we’re all out of ideas’ tone of voice she uses to explain why she’s not only going to keep doing something evil, but not even consider alternative ideas. “ACME is one of the Departments most important allies: we’re not going to jeopardize that for a small town of less than 500 residents.”

“Clancy, we have numerous reports of people getting CANCER,” You emphasized, currently seated in your office, which was bare of any decorations other than a fake diploma on the wall: just a desk, a terminal, and a chair in a room with grey walls and beige carpet. “Several victims are minors: kids, Clancy. ACME poisoned children. We've already identified twenty seven cases where it's probably terminal.”

“There isn’t any significant evidence linking ACME’s waste disposal operations to Gecko’s current health problems,” Clancy responded, tone bored. “For all we know, the town just has a history of health issues.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it!” You growled, beginning to pace back and forth angrily. “27 people from the same coming down with terminal FUCKING leukemia at the same goddamn time isn’t something that happens by COINCIDENCE, even before we factor in the non-terminal cases!”

“Truth is subjective, Edgar. It doesn’t matter what you believe, what matters is what answer allows the Department and ACME to continue turning a profit and, more importantly, what the papers will believe.”

“So that’s it then: ACME kills these people, and they get no justice,” You said flatly. “Lives- entire families- destroyed, and the company that did it doesn’t even get a slap on the wrist.”

“Be realistic, Edgar: even if we decided to prosecute ACME for this, what do you expect the outcome to be?” Clancy said in a patient voice that really, really made you want to punch her. “Best case scenario, a few middle managers go to prison, ACME gets hit with a fine that WILL be waived, and they get a little bad press in the papers. Absolutely none of this you’d be happy with: you’d just complain that the people ‘really responsible’ be punished, you’d complain that the fine wasn’t high enough, or some other issue you’d find with the ruling. I know how you work: there’s nothing that could happen that you’d be happy with. Worst case scenario, you get what you want: ACME gets serious financial penalties and collapses. The Department loses most of its funding, meaning we have to cut several programs and initiatives and massively slow expansion. Millions of people lose their jobs, dozens of communities go under, and that’s before what would happen to ACME City. Food prices skyrocket because ACME Agriculture goes under, meaning the current rationing gets worse, and the government might have to start doing triage.”

“Oh fuck off: just because prosecuting ACME MIGHT have some bad outcomes is no reason to not try. Have you considered what’ll happen if you DON’T prosecute them for this?” You countered. “They’ll keep dumping their waste, killing ecosystems, making it harder for them to bounce back if the bombs fall, to say nothing about poisoning more communities and, because I know how you work and need a fucking practical reason to justify anything, increasing the amount of pollution caused disease burdening our medical systems AS WELL AS those post bomb!”

“Our analysts have considered those factors and have dismissed them as acceptable costs.”

You let out a slow breath, hand tightening around the cold metal of the phone receiver. “Fine,” You said as calmly as possible. “If you can’t prosecute ACME for this, you’re at least going to make them stop dumping in Lousiana-”

“Thats-”

“No. Shut up. Either you do or I do, Clancy, and if I do it it will be by marching into ACME Headquarters and telling their reactor to start counting down.”

“Jesus Christ, Edgar, what the fuck!” Clancy said, clearly rattled. “You can’t be serious-”

“I am not arguing with you about this,” You hissed. “That is my ultimatum, Clancy: either ACME stops by your hand or by my hand.”

“Edgar, you’re really trying to tell me you’d kill hundreds of ACME employees over this? That’s insane! Not to mention you’d DIE in the process. And for what? Petty revenge? Be reasonable.”

“I’ve considered those factors and have dismissed them as acceptable costs,” You said coldly, making Clancy sigh.

“Come on, Ed,” She said, opting for a different tact, voice cajoling. “I know you: you’re an asshole, but you aren’t a killer.”

For a moment, you were silent. “You really don’t know me, Clancy.” You said, flatly. “Maybe you did back when I was in Cambridge, but it’s been a very, very long time since then.”

You heard Clancy give a growl of frustration. “Fucking- Fine, Edgar, have it your way: I’ll lean on ACME and get them to cut it out. Any other demands, your majesty?”

“I have a ton of people sick with disease. I know the Department has a cure for cancer. I want enough doses for every resident of the town.”

“Absolutely not, a single vial of what you’re asking for costs over seven dozen million dollars to create,” Clancy responded flatly. “Beyond that, all available doses are already bound for specific destinations.”

“Clancy-”

“I’m not arguing with you on this, Edgar: I’m already doing you a favor, don’t push it. If you want to solve the communities cancer problem, do it on your own dime.”

Fine. You sighed. You didn’t like it, but you guessed you didn’t have any choice but to live with it.

Unlocked Gecko Community Card:

Gecko: A town poisoned by ACME. Population 481, this small cajun village was located in the Northern Atchafalaya Bayou. It’s primary industry was crawfish farming, it was named for the highly abundant population of wild geckos in the region, and roughly 104 people in it had been diagnosed with leukemia. 

+30 Wrath

Fortified House of Worship [Population, Construction]: For once, the justification for this one isn't wholly propaganda: analysis indicated that when the bombs drop, churches and other holy houses were likely to be the first place civilians without any substantive options are likely to flee. By reinforcing one of these sites to be bomb-proof, it would significantly raise the odds of survivors in the community. 25/200/600, Baton Rouge. Increases Divine Sanctuary stat.

“Why the long face, honey?”

“Ugh. Wright has me reinforcing a synogogue. I don’t know why: there are several perfectly fine christian churches in the area. He says that it’s because the site is more suited for it, but I’m not sure I believe him. Unfortunately, he’s refusing to hear my suggestions for alternative sites. I think the man is a secret jew-lover or something.”

“Isn’t he a college graduate? Doesn’t surprise me: those people practically own the universities. I still don’t know why you work there.”

“Please don’t start this again, Dear-”

“I’m just saying, Jan, its not right: a womans place is at home, minding the children, not in a den of sin helping a bunch of k-”

“JEREMY.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry! But look, you can’t deny that some of the things that place gets up to are less than godly. The church-”

“Is helped best by me working in the Department: besides, without this job, we wouldn’t have the SPD tickets.”

“Are you sure we need them? The Church is pretty secure, and Pastor Ben has been stockpiling food: if the bombs do drop, we could just go there, duck and cover until it’s all blown over.”

“Jeremy, trust me when I say that unless the church has been reinforced to survive a bomb dropping, the Personnel Depot is our best bet: it will have enough food to feed gods chosen- including our children- for decades and thick enough walls to keep them protected through the worst sort of catastrophe. Now, that’s enough: I have enough to deal with at work, I’d rather not deal with it at home.”

Benoits SNITCH-FACTOR has risen by 5!

Construct CERES Unit [Construction, Robotics]: The general term for the DoP's standardized model of AI manager, intended for inclusion in agricultural facilities. By upgrading a facility with one, its overall output would increase by a fair amount. 91/150, New Alexandria. Agriculture tagged infrastructure gains primary stat increase, along with an infrastructure-dependent secondary stat.

Gorilla DNA Library [Ecology, Genetics]: It had been part of your research at Cambridge: cloning real, living silverback gorillas into the world again. You didn't have the equipment to do that, but you could at least preserve their genome by creating a DNA Library in the lab, in case you ever did acquire the equipment. 128/250, unlock Gorilla Genetic Template, unlocking additional projects. -WRATH

Atomicrops Research Notes [Genetics, Agriculture]: The Atomicrops program: you hadn't been party to it, but you had followed it's development with a fair bit of interest until you went into hiding. It might be worth it to refresh your understanding of the project and send in your notes to Warney. 57/100, unlock Atomicrop Genetic Template, speeding up national research and increasing influence.

Being the only qualified scientist slash engineer on the team this quarter has somewhat slowed the amount of research you can conduct. Still, you make fairly decent progress both overseeing the construction of the New Alexandria CERES unit as well as looking into the atomicrops genome. 

The former involves constructing an annex to the power peanut plantation, located on the outskirts of the city on the Bayou. A small fusion core-powered expansion, designed to house for- hopefully- centuries a CERES AI, the facility has most of its power infrastructure finished and part of the mainframe constructed: another good quarter of construction should finish it off.

The latter is fairly easier, but comparatively receives a little less effort, meaning that the rate of progress isn’t particularly different. Already, you’ve noted a few different ways they could probably improve the program, mostly minor tweaks to some of the crops they use. They could also probably improve crop health by 2 to 3% by altering some of the plants symbiotic bacteria. 

And, on your own time, you dig up your research and get to work on the Gorilla DNA Library. This one is mostly a matter of constructing the hardware- a computer ‘server’ built using the latest and greatest in DoP data-technology- and then carefully transferring the data across mediums. 

It’s a lot of data. The good news is, its serving as a helpful refresher: some of the data you had actually forgotten. The bad news is you find yourself running into a completely different problem than what you had anticipated: your tendency towards perfectionism when it came to topics that you gave a shit about.

There are a few places where the advances in technology in recent years means you have the tools to refine past experiments, forcing you to requisition tissue samples from the institute to replicate some of the experiments with updated conditions.  This, combined with the AMOUNT of data, means the process of copying it over takes a fairly long time, especially since all your research data is stored on papers and punch cards. 

It would be a little while longer before you were satisfied with the updated experiments, and even longer before you were entirely finished. 

Community Broadcast Tower [Education, Media]: Radio, then television. These facilities would play on loop various Department created materials, largely a mix of patriotic reaffirmations and edutainment material aimed at both adults and children. 136/200/400, Baton Rouge, increase Public Preparedness stat. Costs 1 Funding to complete per phase.

“Coming Soon: The Department of Preservation Public Broadcast Service of Baton Rogue. Keep abreast of Department initiatives and programs as they’re announced, listen to financial expert Igor Salamance rate which companies are likely to produce a reliable product with your investments to help plan out your purchase of apocalypse preparation, and the Mathew Lewis Build-A-Bunker show, among other offerings. Stay tuned to FM 109.7, Baton Rouge!”

-Ad in the Baton Rogue Times. 

____________________________________________________

Howdy, it’s me again, your friend ENFERR! Sorry about the turn: golly, I guess you can’t win em all. But it’s not all bad! I’ve managed to acquire you some Sponsorships! Now, in prior versions of this program, we utilized something called Joint Projects, based on the very same Joint Projects that the Department has used to enrich both itself and its many partners and affiliates such as ACME!

The history of the former enabling the latter goes back further than you think.

Of course, this wouldn’t work for the version you’re using, so I took the initiative and…tweaked it a little. You’ll now be able to secure deals with various organizations, corporate entities, private interests and other notables! In exchange for fulfilling various criteria, you’ll be given funding, infrastructure licensing rights, useful assets, and even potentially highly skilled personnel. 

Normally, friend, you’d have to complete the Sponsorship mission to gain the benefits of a sponsorship, but just this once, since you seem to be struggling a bit, I’ll do some smooth talking for you so you can get the payment up front. 

After all, what kind of friend would I be if I didn’t help you out when things are looking a little down?

You’ll find I’m a very good friend indeed, Edgar.

Pick. One.

[ ] ACME Burgertorium Project [ACME]: ACME wanted to expand- into fast food! However, to get prices low enough for anyone to afford it, they needed a factory farm. That’s where you come in, Edgar: you help build ACME Burger a few factory farms, and not only will you help create livestock rearing factory farm infrastructure that could help feed the community in case of bomb, you’d also get access to a great deal of very handy ACME brand construction equipment. All at the low low price of destroying more of the states ecology to support human agriculture and subjecting countless animals to cruel and inhumane conditions where they’ll most likely never see sunlight!

Unlock ACME Burger Factory Farms (0/200) [Agriculture, ACME, Facilities]

Must construct 1 ACME Burger Factory Farm

+1 Facilities Dice

[ ] Hubology Research Outpost [Hubology]: Hubology is a PERFECTLY RESPECTABLE AND LEGITIMATE religion that is HIGHLY REGARDED. They have through PERFECTLY LEGITIMATE CHANNELS requested one of their regional communities receive its own research laboratory, which they would repay by providing the Department access to several highly qualified scientists.

Unlock Pluto Compound Community Card and the special Private Research Lab infrastructure (0/200/600) [Corporate, Charity, Construction, Science], which must be built in Pluto Compound at phase 1 before it can be built elsewhere. 

Pluto Compound must gain a second phase Private Research Lab for this sponsorship to complete.

+2 Science Dice

[ ] Power Armor Engineering Workshop [Department of Preservation]: The Department of Preservation wanted to establish a power armor engineering workshop in the region. If you help build it, it will not only benefit much of departments security division, both nationally and regional, it will encourage the Department to invest more into your department. 

Unlock Power Armor Engineering Workshop (0/700) [Power Armor, Gear, DoP, Security]. 

+1 Security Dice

[ ] Lil Patriots Military Orphanage [Patriot Party]: The orphans of today were the patriots of tomorrow! The Patriot Party wanted to help preserve the future of America by constructing a military orphanage for the children of veterans who had perished in the line of duty, and help prepare these sons and daughters of heroes to follow in their parents footsteps, no doubt as they would have wanted. 

Unlock Lil Patriots Orphanage (0/100/200/300) [Construction, Education, Outreach]

Must construct two Lil Patriots. 

+1 Outreach, +1 Funding. 

[ ] Camp Freedom [Military]: The military was currently running out of space in its current facilities for those of chinese descent. They want you to build an additional holding facility in northern Louisiana to house these individuals where they would be unable to act as potential traitors on behalf of their parent nation.

Unlock Camp Enduring Freedom Internment Facility [Population, Military, Security] (0/150/300/450/600)

Gain Captain Rock as a subordinate, a [Interrogator] who can work on the following tags: [Security, Investigation, Military]