A few concerning patterns... Part Two (Patreon)

Today is part two of some common patterns that I’ve seen erode trust between people, in polyamory or otherwise. It's anecdote-driven, as always, so let me know if you have a different experience or perspective. Any of these could also be their own video, but maybe this brief overview can be of service to you. 🙏

Timecode:

• 0.00 Intro
• 00.58 Do they ever confuse autonomy with answering to no one / hyper-individualism?
• 05.05 Minimizing or withholding info in an attempt to protect feelings (outside of explicit requests to know or hear less). Does a person decide for other peers what's relevant for them to know? Is lying ever falsely framed as care?
• 08.48 Changing the subject during conflict, and not coming back to it (especially when the topic is their own missteps or pain they may have caused)
• 10.15 Silently building resentment, when it's otherwise safe to bring things up.
• 12.05 Putting their own comfort above other peoples' safety. (e.g. cheating because of instant gratification, or trying to control a partner so we never have to feel distress, or being passive in the face of bigotry toward others, etc.)
• 13.15 Outro / We contain multitudes, I'm not above doing these things from time to time. How do we respond when it's brought to our attention? Is there demonstrated growth?

Captions auto generated by Patreon; Transcript at the bottom of this post via Otter AI

Warmly,

Morgan