Review: "Black Mirror" & Digitally Simulated Non-monogamy (Patreon)

The following contains spoilers for Black Mirror (Season 5, Episode 1: "Striking Vipers").

Is it possible to have a virtual reality metamour?

Black Mirror, if you haven’t seen it, is a dystopian anthology that explores the intersection of tech and sociopolitical dynamics. In “Striking Vipers,” the premiere episode of Season 5, two straight men hook up in a VR simulation. So. Let's jump in!

Danny and Karl, straight friends for years, hop into the bodies of martial arts fighters Lance and Roxette, respectively. The VR tech is so advanced, that every sensation in the game transfers to real life. Danny’s knees and back don’t hurt anymore. He gets to feel young again. Karl, a 6’3” cis man, gets to live in the body of a petite cis woman. 

Fighting turns to wrestling, wrestling into grinding, so on. 

Even though the digital sex is cis/het, they start to wonder if they’re gay. This gets exacerbated when neither of them wants sex with their femme partners in real life anymore. 

The one thing that feels like a missed opportunity is how they could’ve explored intersectionality in queerness, since both men are black Americans. 

As it is, the show tries to be colorblind, and doesn’t acknowledge how black American culture might complicate the “am I gay” question. Do I know how they could’ve done better? Not really. I’m not a queer black man. My only knowledge is what friends and partners have relayed to me about homophobia / transphobia in their communities. That’s why I was interested to see what the show might do, but then they just sorta glazed over it. Oh well.

What IS fascinating though, is Karl’s desire to stay in Roxette’s body. He loves being a cis woman, and gushes about how amazing his vaginal orgasms are. 

Then, when trying to have sex with his girlfriend, Karl can’t stay aroused in that body. It’s only when he hears her masturbating, that he starts to perk up again, fantasizing about having a vagina, too. This is such a unique take on gender dysphoria, and I’m SO here for it!

Danny: “I mean, I can’t do it anymore. It’s not fair to Theo."
Karl: “But it’s not cheating. It’s not real. It’s like… porn or something.”

In my opinion, this is still cheating. But it’s debatable, right? Super interesting gray area. Nevertheless, they’re keeping these VR hook-ups secret, and it harms their partners. So to me, that’s infidelity. 

Danny sees the strain it's putting on his marriage, so deletes the game. But one of the (many) problems with his wife staying in the dark about it, is she has no clue about the tension with Karl. So she invites him over to dinner. And MY LORD, it’s the most tense, cringe-worthy dinner I’ve seen in a longy long time.

Karl: "Ok, so… we’re not gonna fight?"
Danny: "We’re gonna kiss."
Karl: "Kiss?"
Danny: "It’s the only way. We gotta know. "

They finally kiss in their real bodies, and… nothing. “Not a damn thing,” Karl shrugs. “But in the game, it’s different...” 

That’s when Danny throws a punch. They fight until the cops show up (which... again, not even a moment of racial tension when they get arrested? I dunno. It just feels dishonest to omit that, given the context of the national discourse right now. But anyway.) Theo comes to bail Danny out, and that’s when he finally comes clean.

What happens next? Consent. Sort of.

They strike a compromise: one day a year, they both get to have sex with someone else. Sooooo, it’s eventually consensual, which is good... 

But it did bum me out to see so many restrictions put on it. Like, why not just be poly if you’re gonna be poly, you know? Bittersweet, to say the least.

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TLDR: For the portrayal of ethical non-monogamy in “Striking Vipers,” I give Black Mirror a D. They have a compelling premise, and the actors are FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC. But it’s primarily a story about cheating. In the last two minutes of the show, all the characters do consent, but it only gives metamours 1 day a year. That doesn’t feel like free and relaxed non-monogamy to me. But hey, if that arrangement doesn’t hurt anyone, then they’ve found an ethical way to do it, I guess!