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372 Pages Ep 144 - Artemis - Ep 3 - Rudy Explained, Kinda! (Patreon)

Published:
2023-05-24 17:48:00
Edited:
2023-12-19 19:24:11
Imported:

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Content

In this episode:

  • Spontaneous jackals bearing conspiracy theories
  • Conor's appearance on Jeopardy? Premonition?
  • Insanely difficult Real or Fanfic
  • Dumb Sentences of the Flexible Time Period

And much more, including this general question for readers / listeners: are we supposed to like Jazz?!

READING ASSIGNMENT: Through chapter 14

[NOTE: Probably goes without saying, but our protagonist swears a good deal in this and we do quote her, fyi]

Comments

Kelley Bard

I was inspired by Beez Mckeever to use ChatGPT to write an Artemis scene. I wouldn’t submit it for real or fanfic as I don’t think it would fly… but it could almost be out of the book. ChatGPT Jazz, the quirky protagonist of Artemis, found herself in another tight spot. She was trying to sneak into the city's main control center, but her plan had gone completely awry. Instead of blending in with the crowd, she accidentally tripped over her own feet and crashed into a nearby vending machine. As Jazz struggled to untangle herself from the wreckage, the vending machine started spewing cans of soda all around her. Each can hit the ground with a comical "pop" and rolled in a different direction. Jazz scrambled to collect them, muttering under her breath. "Great. Just great," Jazz muttered. "Because what I really need right now is a soda explosion." Just as she managed to collect most of the rogue cans, a group of security guards turned the corner. They paused, clearly puzzled by the chaotic scene before them. Jazz decided to play it cool, or at least as cool as one can be when surrounded by runaway soda cans. "Hey, fellas," Jazz said with an exaggerated grin. "You won't believe it, but I've invented a new sport: Can Rolling. Care to join me?" The security guards exchanged confused glances before one of them cleared his throat. "Uh, sorry, miss, but we're on duty. Can't join you in any can-related activities." Jazz shrugged, not missing a beat. "No problemo! It's an exclusive game, only for the soda connoisseurs. But hey, I'll share a can of bubbly refreshment with you. Choose your flavor!" She extended her arm, presenting the guards with an assortment of soda cans she had collected. The guards stared at her, unsure of how to respond to this peculiar situation. "I'm more of a cola guy," one of the guards finally said, eyeing the cans with a hint of curiosity. "Ah, a classic choice!" Jazz exclaimed, pulling out a can of cola and handing it over with a theatrical flourish. "Enjoy the refreshing taste and become a Can Rolling legend in your own right!" As the guards cautiously accepted their beverages, Jazz took advantage of the distraction to slip away. She ducked behind a nearby bush, muffling her laughter with her hand. "Note to self: never underestimate the power of soda-related shenanigans," Jazz whispered to herself. "I may not have blended in, but at least I bought myself some time." With a mischievous grin, Jazz continued her quest, leaving behind a trail of rolling soda cans and befuddled security guards. Sometimes, even in the most dire situations, a little silliness could be the perfect escape.

Gina Dalfonzo

Given the impressively wide range of cultural references we've always gotten on MST3K and RiffTrax, I've been amused at how perpetually surprised everyone is that Buster Keaton, et al., might still be remembered in the future. (But it's true that knowing these things would seem to suggest a certain personality type that Jazz doesn't fit.)

Eye-Gor
>>109513966

Yeah, I'm kind of baffled by Mike and Conor's incredulity on people knowing things before their own generation. I knew I Love Lucy because of Nick At Nite, older Mel Brooks and Airplane and MAD Magazine because of my father, certain British comedies thanks to PBS. If anything, YouTube and streaming services have opened up a lot of pop culture choices from many different generations. My son's generation has a lot more options than I did at his age. I agree that some of Jazz's choices are surprising, but this to me seems a really weird tangent (compared to the many, many others to make about our Unlikable Protagonist).

JohnCattaneo
>>109426281

Hilarious! The problem here is the quality of writing is actually better than Weir's.