Kira Carsen Diaper Jedi Chapter 7: Tragedy and Infatuation (Patreon)

The mission on Tatooine felt very much like a turning point for Kira and her master. Falynn had pushed her to tell her former master, Bela Kiwiiks the truth about her time in a Sith academy while also supporting her as a Jedi and friend.

'Friend' didn't really feel like the right word though. They weren’t just friends, not since that kiss. For Kira, it felt like she didn't know what they were really. The conversation they needed to have wasn’t happening. Because of that they’d yet to define what they were or even what they wanted from each other in terms of a relationship.

She wasn’t even sure Falynn actually wanted a relationship with her or if they could have one as Jedi. They weren’t supposed to have emotional attachments in the order. That didn’t mean she wasn’t feeling one forming. Given her past, it wasn’t like she wasn’t used to breaking any rules.

Despite the state of limbo they found themselves in, the weeks spent together on the Knight’’s Chariot were generally happy. They worked well as a team while going on missions for the council. They spent a ton of time together in the interim between those missions too, and gradually Kira got more and more comfortable about her padding while around her master.

On the Chariot, she didn’t feel the need to wear flowing skirts or baggy trousers. Occasionally she’d even go bottomless. Just sitting comfortably in her diaper around the dejarik board in her padding.

Falynn hardly treated her any differently. The only difference she noticed was the way his gaze was drawn to her diapers from time to time. Every so often his eye would flick down and look at her diaper.

She still had some reservations. She couldn’t wet her padding in front of him if she wasn’t wearing pants and was still running off to the bathroom or her quarters to fill the seat of her nappy. She knew it'd happened before but it felt embarrassing to do it openly in front of him now.

She always felt awkward after it happened but her master never did, he didn’t even address it unless she did and it was always with ambivalence.

The atmosphere on the ship started to shift into something comfortable, a place she might be able to call home. Every place she’d lived long-term hadn’t been able to garner such a title. They’d just been places to live, places she’d survived in. Stepping stones from one area to the next.

She never wanted to leave that comfort and wished desperately that the nagging worry of the Sith superweapons wasn’t pecking at the back of their mind. Somewhere out there Angral was amassing power. Any day now they’d receive word from the council about the next superweapon.

Them jumping into action didn’t necessarily mean the halcyon days would be over but she had a bad feeling that something was coming that would change everything.

Communication came in four days later. A day after that they landed on Alderaan.

–––––––––––––––––––Alderaan–––––––––––––––––––

General Val-Suthra briefed them on the civil war between the planet’s noble houses and the superweapon built by the Republic, the Death Mark Laser. It was a surprise to both of them to learn that the Empire hadn't constructed such a device.

When they asked about it the general's explanation left Kira and her master disappointed. It was an orbital space laser with pinpoint accuracy used for discrete assassinations across the planet. To know the government they’d been supporting would use underhanded tactics made them question the loyalty of the Jedi temple to such a regime.

Their argument was short-lived as they could see it would get them nowhere.

Rather than a philosophical argument they pursued their mission, eventually reuniting with Falynn’s master Orgus Din, and one of the main scientists who worked on the project, Parvux.

It was a short and sweet reunion because the objective remained the same. They still needed to shut down the laser, it would just be easier. They fought their way through the local fauna, bouncing between noble houses and dealing with their squabbles. Along the way, they actually found one of the Death Mark's terminals. They were able to disable its targeting system.

Eventually, the decision to separate came when Din detected Angral’s ship at the edge of the system. His plan was to sneak aboard and face the Sith lord. Kira and Falynn wished him luck and continued pursuing one of Angral’s apprentices, Nefarid.

They found him at their hideout in the Glarus Valley. Of course, he was waiting for them. From some darkened corner of the room the dark Sith’s apprentice activated a projection that displayed live footage from Angral’s ship, The Oppressor.

Kira watched on in horror as Orgus Din was struck down by the Sith lord. She remained silent while Falynn called out, his misery echoing outward and sending waves through the force. She saw in those waves the briefest hint of darkness. His emotions were overflowing, overriding the years of training he had suppressing negative feelings.

It passed in a flash, with balance returning to the Jedi.

“Good luck finding me, Jedi!” Nefarid yelled, his force cloaking keeping him hidden.

“I don’t need to see you. I can smell you!” Falynn jeered.

Kira blushed and looked back. “At least it’s not me this time.” she grumbled.

“Just so you know.” Nefarid taunted, “The Death Mark is fully operational again. That’ll make it all the more difficult for you.”

A blazing beam shot down from the sky, incinerating the ground where Falynn had stood seconds ago. He’d jumped just before it hit, landing safely on the floor below.

Kira watched as he ignited his lightsaber and Nefarid appeared from beneath force cloaking. Her master was cold and calculating, none of his anger radiated the way she expected. Were it her, if she had to watch Falynn or Master Kiwiiks fall like that… She’d let her rage take over in a second.

Amazed at his strength of will she jumped down after him, readying her saber to help her master. The Death Mark continued to rain down lasers aimed at Falynn through the fight

Despite the constant barrage, he dodged each one all while d holding back Nefarid’s lightning effortlessly. The Sith Lord fell without much fanfare. Rather than celebrating they continued through the compound, Falynn still dodging shots from the laser.

Not many words were shared between Kira and her master while they rushed to the machine’s control console. There were still Sith all around them anyway so she focused on fighting. Once everybody was cleared out, her master was able to switch the target to the Death Mark’s targeting computer. It was a move born not of desperation but of quick thinking, once again showing her master’s balance even in the worst of times.

–––––––––––––––––––After Alderaan–––––––––––––––––––

The squabbles of the noble houses were squashed when spies were exchanged and they learned of the treachery of the Empire. In a flash the civil war pushed toward its end, the actions of the Jedi having done as much as they could to unite the various houses.

The Republic was able to recover Falynn’s master’s body because Angral had decided to pay him a great disrespect and leave him floating in space.

Despite his defeat, Orgus had done something amazing before he died and hidden a tracker on The Oppressor. As soon as the ship dropped out of hyperspace they’d have its location.

While the Jedi gathered their forces and the republic army prepared, Kira and Falynn were told they had to wait. This led to more downtime than they expected. Before they knew it more than a week had passed.

–––––––––––––––––––The Knight’s Chariot–––––––––––––––––––

Kira roused awake in one of the padded common room seats of the ship. She hadn’t even remembered falling asleep, but it wasn’t a surprise that she had. Despite being on the Chariot all this time she wasn’t just resting.

After Master Orgus passed, Falynn’s carefree attitude dissipated. He spent the majority of his time just wandering the ship. He was stone-faced and quiet any time she saw him and it made him somewhat unapproachable. She wanted to do something to cheer him up, or even to comfort him but she didn’t know how.

Instead, she trained, pushing herself harder and harder. Their next battle would be against Angral and she wanted to be ready for the fight. It was partially out of fear. Watching Master Orgus die made her worry for her own master.

If a great Jedi such as Orgus could fall to the Sith how could she and Falynn stand up against him? She wanted to have hope, but the terror she felt clouded her mind. Even meditation couldn’t clear the disturbance she was feeling.

It wouldn’t even be so bad for her if she wasn’t the only one going through it. The air around Falynn remained calm. The burst of emotion that’d sent ripples through the force wasn’t present, she couldn’t feel any of that anger in him.

In the padded seat, Kira stretched, letting her limbs shiver and shake as she pulled herself into the waking world. Despite how tense she felt, she still craved the comforts that she’d learned to enjoy in the days before Alderaan.

That meant lounging in the Chariot without a skirt. Her padding crinkled beneath her as she shifted. She wasn’t surprised to feel a soreness in her muscles given how hard she’d been training. She was surprised by a specific muscle twitching.

Her bladder was painfully full and with her lack of control she had but seconds before it released into her diaper. She couldn't really move, the soreness in her limbs prevented her from shifting. Her normal morning routine was to either deal with a nighttime wetting or to let loose in her padding anyway.

Even with Falynn sitting across from her she let loose, only realizing it was too late to hold onto whatever humility she had left. The last week had been hard and waking up today had her realizing she’d burned herself out. “Ngggh ahhhh.” A little strain and a sigh of relief was the only sound she made before a steady flow poured into her padding.

The heat spread out across her diaper’s soft core, causing it to swell. The sound of her urine hissing like a small and steady stream beneath her plastic-shelled nappy actually did pull Falynn’s attention, breaking him from his very serious stupor.

“Kira? Are you...?”

She didn’t have to answer his question, at least not directly, her padding was doing it for her. A yellow stain was spreading across the crotch of her nappy. She could feel the heat moving at the same pace, gracing her skin with its warmth as the absorbent core worked to soak up the spreading urine.

For the first time in days, he smiled.

Kira blushed, turning her gaze away from Falynn. She was wildly embarrassed but saw an opportunity through her distress.

“If I’d known all I had to do to break your bad mood was pee myself I’d have done it days ago.” she teased. Even if the words on her tongue felt right, she was still shaking internally as she said them. Such honesty felt strange but the humor of it seemed to pull her master back.

His face fell for a second before his smile returned. “That obvious huh?” Falynn asked.

“I can tell something has been bothering you since Master Orgus fell. Your emotions have been still, I haven’t been able to detect anything… At least not since before the fight. There was a moment there… I felt darkness”

Expressing her concerns like this was shockingly easy compared to admitting she’d pissed herself. She wasn’t sure if it was the exhaustion or the week she’d spent parsing through her emotions that made her previous worries seem trivial but she no longer felt a need to hold back.

Falynn nodded solemnly. “I felt it too. Honestly, it’s what I spent a lot of my time thinking about this last week. I needed to examine myself, to make sure I was ready to fight Angral for the right reasons, not just for vengeance.”

“You were… meditating?” Kira asked. She’d never seen somebody actively move around and meditate at the same time. Falynn had always seemed like a different class of Jedi though, maybe she just hadn’t had the chance to learn about it as a padawan.

“Exactly” he confirmed, “I’m sorry for remaining quiet all this time. I hadn’t considered how that might make you feel.”

Kira blushed. She hadn’t been looking for an apology but his consideration was sweet, sweeter than she felt she deserved if she was honest with herself. She should have made more of an effort to talk to him. Instead, she’d gone and distracted herself with training of her own.

“It’s not like I went out of my way to check up on you…” she admitted.

“I suppose we each could have done better about that.”

“Why not start now?” she asked, “Are you doing okay?”

Falynn gave a slow and deliberate blink. “I am and I’m not.”

“What do you mean?”

“My motives aren't stemming from vengeance. I don’t want to fight Angral because of what happened to my master. I want to face him because he’s a threat to the safety of the Republic and its people. That doesn’t change the fact that I had to watch my master die.”

Kira watched as his face flashed through a variety of emotions. Now that he wasn’t meditating she could feel them more deeply. She hadn’t been alone in her struggles, he was just much better at hiding his own.

“They tell me that Orgus got the last laugh by planting that tracker on his ship. I can’t help but feel like the cost was too great.” he said.

Kira nodded. “All I could think about is how I’d feel if you had been in Master Orgus’ place. The rage you felt would have been more than a flash for me. It scared me. I would have flown at Nefarid with nothing but fury.”

Falynn stood from his seat, approaching Kira. She couldn’t even react before he wrapped her up in a hug. Kira stiffened. She felt like all the air had been stolen from her lungs in that moment, squeezed out by Falynn’s powerful arms.

It took her a second to realize what was happening but when she did, she herself was wrapping her arms around her master, reciprocating his hug.

“Don’t think I’d ever let you fall to the dark side. Even if I have to pull you back kicking and screaming I’d break you free from their control. I’d do anything to keep you by my side Kira.”

“Anything?” she asked, feeling part of her well up.

“Anything.” he guaranteed.

“You must really like having me as your padawan.” she sniffled.

“It’s more than that,” he said, “I like having you around. I know we’re not supposed to have attachments but… I think I’m not willing to let you go.”

The words were at the tip of her tongue. She’d said so much already. Why wouldn’t she go forward and say the one thing she really wanted to?

“I can’t let you go either…”

Falynn’s grip didn’t relax from Kira’s body. He kept her there for a long moment. She was terrified that he was about to reject the feelings she’d just offered. Apparently, he himself was just trying to find the words.

He couldn’t.

They separated only to reconnect in a passionate kiss. They were breaking so many taboos already but she didn’t care. It was as if the order didn’t exist, the war outside of the Chariot didn’t exist, and even the problems they were struggling with didn’t exist.

They were the only two people in the galaxy for that long moment that they were locking lips. Kira had never felt joy like that before.