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I knew this chapter was coming. I gave it a lot of thought, and it still took way longer to get right than I thought it would. ~Eric

***

A cocoon of shadow surrounded Sen. He had made and sustained it all night while he sat cross-legged on the roof of the galehouse. The hope had been that immersing himself in shadow that way would help provide some insight into the shadow walking technique. That hadn’t happened at all. It had mostly just served as a way to sharpen the other skills that let him evaluate the environment around him without recourse to sight. It wasn’t a wasted effort since Sen couldn’t know when an enemy might deploy a technique that would temporarily blind him. It just hadn’t done much to help him understand how one stepped through a shadow into some other place. He felt it when Falling Leaf jumped up to join him on the roof. He relaxed his iron grip on the shadow qi and let it disperse, which revealed the pre-dawn illumination just barely lighting the horizon. Falling Leaf studied Sen for a moment before she sat down next to him.

“Why didn’t you offer to teach me to write?” she asked without preamble.

“You didn’t seem interested,” said Sen, frowning as he thought. “Also, I guess I thought you already could since you can read. People who read can usually write.”

Falling Leaf shook her head. “I learned to read by watching the humans in town, and by watching you. The Caihong also helped me learn a bit more.”

“But no writing?”

She lifted an eyebrow at him. “Paws are not good for holding objects like brushes. There were other priorities since I got hands.”

“Right,” said Sen feeling a little foolish for not recognizing the obvious there. “Well, you’re certainly welcome to join in when I’m teaching Ai and Glimmer of Night.”

Falling Leaf looked away then. “It’s not important.”

He squinted at ghost panther in the dim light. I don’t understand what is happening right now, thought Sen. She’d come outside, jumped up to the roof, and asked the question. Then, when he’d told her that she could join in, she suddenly didn’t care anymore. While social signals were often lost on Sen, even he could see that there was something else at work. If it wasn’t about the writing… Sen wanted to bury his face in his hands for being so oblivious. He’d been pouring time and energy into taking care of Ai. He’d been spending time with Glimmer of Night, trying to use the spider’s insights to generate some of his own. He’d been spending time with Fu Ruolan before she stormed off in a huff. He’d even been spending time with the people in town. He'd been spending time with everyone but her.

“I haven’t been a very good friend to you at all these last few years, have I?” asked Sen. “You’re only here because of me, and I’m gone or training most of the time. That’s when I’m not almost dying. I know you’ve been training with Fu Ruolan, but she’s not a friend. Glimmer of Night is a basically a stranger. And Ai—”

“She is a kit,” said Falling Leaf. “A kit must be tended and protected. All understand this.”

“True. Still, I haven’t been making much time for you.”

“I’m not foolish. I know much is demanded of you. I also know that what happens to me matters to you. You would not have brought the elder fox here if it didn’t.”

“Not that bringing him here did much good,” said Sen.

“Perhaps not, but even the fox thought he could help. How could you know that he was wrong? You also could have demanded knowledge or treasures for your own use, but you bartered with him to help me. I do not doubt your care for me, human boy. It is simply that I miss you.”

Rarely had Sen felt so damned by such a basic utterance as I miss you. When the person saying it shared the same home, he couldn’t help but feel that it had gone beyond mere inattention and progressed into flat-out negligence. It hadn’t been malicious. Sen wasn’t delusional. He had been insanely busy for most of the last few years. There had been long stretches where there just hadn’t been any time to spend on anything other than surviving. Since he’d gotten back from his little adventure with Laughing River, though, he could have found time. He could have, but he hadn’t. For once in his life, though, the problem in front of him was something fixable.

“There’s no reason why I can’t teach you to write after Ai goes to bed for the night. It’s not like we need that much sleep.”

Falling Leaf didn’t say anything. She just smiled at him and nodded. Then, as fast as she had appeared, she was gone from the roof. Sen didn’t know if he’d actually end up teaching her to write, although he might. It was a useful skill, and she’d benefit from it. It was the commitment Falling Leaf cared about. The reassurance that he would make time to spend with her now that madness and looming death wasn’t infecting every part of their lives. And it was such a small thing to ask for when compared to everything she had given him. If he could find entire days to spend in meditation and travel to town to teach people how to use spears, he would find a couple of hours to spend with her most days.

Sen stayed up on the roof for a little longer. He watched as the sun slowly crested the horizon and considered if he was working hard enough to sustain any of his important relationships. While Master Feng, Auntie Caihong, and Uncle Kho were used to long absences in each other’s lives, he doubted the same was true for most of the other people he knew. He supposed it was easy to ignore a five or ten-year gap in communication when centuries were trivial to you. Most people didn’t have that perspective. Still, most of that was a problem for another day. His more immediate problem was utterly prosaic, but oddly pressing. He needed to make Ai breakfast. It was going to be a busy day. She’d been asking about Dai Bao and the little girl she’d met, Zhi. So, Sen had promised he’d take her with him to town the next time he went.

I should invite Falling Leaf, thought Sen as he prepared some food. As had become her habit, Liu Ai groggily came out of her room, shadow ball clutched protectively in one arm and a blanket dragging from the other. Sen settled the blanket around her shoulders and put her in a chair, where she slowly woke up as he finished making breakfast. Falling Leaf came into the galehouse not too long after, which made Ai stir and hold out her arms. The ghost panther had come to some kind of accommodation with her discomfort regarding human children. She dutifully picked up the girl, who put her head on Falling Leaf’s shoulder and started snoring lightly.

“We’re going to town today as part of my grand plan for Ai to get glimpses of normalcy,” said Sen. “You’re welcome to come with us. You’ll get to see some mortals fumble around with spears.”

“They don’t like me,” said Falling Leaf. “After what I did at the inn.”

“I don’t care what they like. I like you, and they can deal with it.”

Falling Leaf still looked uncertain.

“If you don’t want to go because you simply don’t want to go, I understand that. If you don’t want to go because of what those townspeople think, to hells with that. That whole town owes me. If the only thing I ask for is that they behave nicely to my friend, they’re getting off cheap.”

Falling Leaf’s face cleared up at those words. “I’ll come along. I can leave if I don’t like it.”

“Good plan,” said Sen. “Plus, you’ll get to meet Ai’s friends.”

“The grumpy man?” asked Falling Leaf.

Sen nodded. “Yes. There’s also a little girl there she seems to like.”

“Zhi,” mumbled Ai around a yawn. “She draws birds.”

“Yes, she does,” agreed Sen.

“I draw orchids,” declared Ai.

Falling Leaf looked to Sen for confirmation. He subtly shook his head in the negative.

“Ai does draw lovely flowers,” he added to try to give Falling Leaf some kind of context.

The flower conversation was summarily ended by the appearance of hot food. Then, it was time to get ready to leave, at which point Ai couldn’t decide if she should bring along her brush to show off. It was clear she wanted to, and equally clear that she was worried it would get damaged. Sen decided that letting her make the occasional decision would probably be good for her in the long run. She eventually plucked the brush out of it’s cubby and brought it over to Sen. He could see her trying to formulate the question. Confident that phrases like spatial treasure were beyond her, he didn’t make her stumble through it.

“Would you like me to hang on to that for you?” he asked.

She nodded. “Please.”

Sen held out his hand, and she gently rested it across his palm. He dropped it into his storage ring. As usual, this disappearing trick delighted the little girl to no end. If he was going to be storing things for her, though, he thought it was time she knew where the stuff went.

“Do you know where things go when I do that?” he asked.

Ai shook her head. Sen held out a hand and pointed to one of the rings he wore.

“It goes in there.”

Ai shook her head and smiled at him in a way that said she knew he was trying to trick her.

“No, it doesn’t,” she declared.

“It does.”

“It’s too small,” she said.

“It’s a magic ring,” he told her. “And its magic power is to store things and keep them safe.”

Clearly doubting Sen, Ai looked over to Falling Leaf.

“It’s true,” said Falling Leaf. “I have a ring like that, too.”

An apple appeared in her hand, making the little girl gasp. Ai immediately ran over and poked at the piece of fruit as if to reassure herself that it wasn’t some terrible grownup deception. Falling Leaf handed her the apple. Ai examined it closely before she came back over to Sen and very deliberately touched the apple to the ring he’d pointed at earlier. He smiled.

“I have use my magic to tell the ring to work,” said Sen.

It wasn’t exactly true, but he figured it was close enough. She gave him another dubious look.

“Really?” she asked.

“Do it again, and I’ll tell the ring to work.”

Ai once again pressed the apple against the ring. Sen activated the ring, and the apple disappeared. It was only after Sen made the fruit reappear and re-disappear several times that Ai seemed to accept that he wasn’t tricking her. Then, she said something that Sen felt like he should have anticipated.

“Put me in the ring!” she shouted excitedly.

Thank the heavens Lo Meifeng isn’t here, thought Sen. She’d be encouraging the girl.

Comments

luda305

"why'd you hand me a piece of chocolate?" Sen asked "To encourage positive action," she replied.

Wes Brown

I've read this chapter twice maybe three times, i frequentlyreread chapters when im waiting for the next one.... I love it and hate this chapter at the same time. I feel like before Falling Leaf changed her form she and Sen were closer. Emotionally and physically. I feel like I rember them doing stuff together, running, playing tag, eating together, taking naps in the sun together. I know Falling Leaf doesn't like to talk much, and I know Sen grew up in a literal alleyway so he's not all touchy feely...but I really feel like this would have been a good scene for a hug. I think they both need it even if they don't know it. I wish Sen could have given her a hug, he loves ( yes I'm saying it, even if it hasn't been said, what are you supposed to call it when you'd literally die or burn down the world for someone) Falling Leaf more than anyone else in his life, I wish he could give her a hug and they could be close again like before she changed into a human. I'm not even talking about sex and stuff, I mean like idk he loves her and she loves him, can't they at least hug or hold hands or something? I'm glad they presumably will get to be spending more time together. But I feel like Sen needs to do more. Falling Leaf doesn't do gifts, she doesn't do words, she doesn't even necessarily do quality time seeing as she needs to spend so much time by herself. On the beginning of their relationship Sen gave her food, and she presumably liked that enough they she kept coming back. Sen can cook, he enjoys cooking for people, I don't know maybe he needs to start there. But I feel like thy need more from eachother than cooking, fighting, and being in general proximity to eachother...they are both orphans for Pete's sake! If they have made the choice to stay together through so many things I want to see some growth in this relationship. Doesnt have to be what my idea of love is, but they clearly love eachother some kinda of way....and Falling Leaf is clearly feeling lonely. Sen needs to get his shit in gear and get it together. They are eachothers only family....what gives? That's all, thanks for the chapter, I'll try not to project my own feeling into the situation too much, sorry.