Late night life update: (Patreon)

Hey. Been a minute.

As you have seen on Patreon, I am going back and forth between ok days and not so ok days. Having cPTSD and flashbacks, I am just struggling to be a functioning human being.

I’m hyperfocusing too hard on my favorite things which right now is anime and gaming. I am also struggling with drinking and smoking. I hate admitting it but, accountability does wonders so I might as well tell yall.

I found a counselor to talk to and really start letting shit go. It’s HARD. My brain wants to hold onto it and not let it out. Hell, even you guys know more than my parents do. That one thing especially, my parents don’t know, and I hope to god they never do… it was too traumatizing.

I think because this part of my journey is just starting, my Patreon is taking a hit, and I wanted to come on here and explain that. I’m really trying to hermit less. I’m really trying to drink and smoke less, and it’s taking so much energy. I started smoking to be able to film a video, freaked out and had a flashback from that, and have just been posting anime only basically…

Like I always say and will never stop saying: I really appreciate you guys. I know following and subscribing to me on here isn’t the best right now, and it probably won’t be for a bit, but I’m glad you’re here. I appreciate you sticking around when a lot of irl’s didn’t, and won’t. I’m keeping everything at the $2 tier cuz I can’t be consistent yet. That’ll take time. But to those of you here, you’re helping me afford my appointments that me and my parents can’t fully afford, and I am so grateful.

I’m doing my best. I am working at this with what little energy I have in my body, but dammit it’s all I got. And that’s ok. I can do it.

AnYwAyS, hope you all have a lovely evening. I am hanging out with my sister in law as we pack up to go to SF as a family tomorrow to Sunday.

Oh: THIS DOES MEAN DEMON SLAYER WILL BE LATE, ALONG WITH LISA’S THE FIRST TAKE VIDEO. I’ll post em Sunday night!

Ok, I’m gonna head to bed. I just needed to get that out. Love you guys ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

🌻