[D'sP] Jim Causes A Ruckus - Chapter 28 (Patreon)
Content
A group of twelve guys all armed with small utility axes make their way towards a rip in reality. The gruffest looking guy yells at one of the people in front, “Jim, don’t you dare try running back to your forest again!”
Jim sighs, ‘as if I could, you idiot. Not like I am at the front of this disaster because I want to be. This whole end of the world thing isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. The tutorial was nice enough but getting my weapon and most of my gear confiscated the second I get teleported to town wasn’t any fun. How was I supposed to know the guy in a police uniform was actually just some random thug? Dressing up like that has to be the cleverest thing those idiots have ever come up with.’
“Head out of the clouds you numb nut!” The gruff guy grumbles, “Be glad we gave you that hatchet to fight with because if I see you hesitate in the slightest I get to duel wield today. You got that? Frank has your little forest town under his thumb and I’m not afraid to lie my butt off when we get back to put all the blame on you. You don’t want to know what Jay and his gang would do to my group if things go south.”
Jim rolls his eyes, “yeah, yeah, we all experienced a dungeon before and that one’s new. We should be able to walk through it. Especially since we have like a dozen men here and that place shouldn’t have any measures in place to stop that kind of nonsense.”
The gruff guy scoffs, “Just remember that anything that drops goes into my pack. That goes for all of you. Neither town would be a nice place for us if even a single drop of monster blood gets out to the populace.”
Jim rolls his eyes again, ‘Wouldn’t want the sheep to get any ideas, would we now? Sure we all got training but so many just slacked off I am surprised the gangs even gathered as many as they did. Seriously, they even accepted you who hasn’t raised his level since getting out. Not that you’ve told us you work for them but come on. You’re so obviously just one of their thugs.’
‘First chance I get, I’m leaving your butts behind and doing just what you expect. That forest is calling my name and my ranger class path will let me survive just fine out there. Good thing they believed me when I said I had just taken the tutorial path like every other idiot in town seems to have done. No one back there in either town stood a chance against those bullies. I would like to help but for now there isn’t much I can do without some more skill levels under my belt.’
Then the group is upon the new dungeon's entrance, a black hole with jagged edges floating just a hand span off the ground at the top of a hill. An ominous sight especially when the group notices that you can’t even see it from the side or back. Then the gruff thug pushes Jim and a couple other people through the portal.
Once through the two nobodies both stumble around while Jim hugs the wall and takes stock of what he can see. A couple of bees are buzzing around some clover and a trio of horned rabbits are across the room.
The nobodies notice those rabbits and go for them like rabid dogs. This doesn’t work out too well as alerted to their presence the rabbits begin to easily dodge their wild swings. All that however gives Jim the time to notice one other thing in the room. Right next to him is a fourth horned rabbit, frozen in place from fright.
Jim glances back at the two fools to confirm they haven’t noticed anything and then with great care takes a swing. The horned rabbit doesn’t even have time to make a sound as it dies from the terminal lack of a head. Near the portal the clover is long enough to hide the now dead rabbit so Jim positions himself between the idiots and his kill.
Even being idiots the other three rabbits don’t have anywhere to go and so they start to fall. This however takes enough time for the rabbit Jim had killed to despawn and leave behind a small piece of meat. With great care as to not attract attention Jim sits down with his back to the meat and takes out a broad leaf from under his shirt. Hands behind his back he fumbles for a moment but manages to wrap the meat up getting no blood on his hands. Now wrapped up and not likely to leak through his clothes Jim slips it up the back of his shirt and under a band of cloth he has wrapped around his chest, hiding his loot.
‘As if I am going to give up food to those idiots back at town. Not much but this little bit should be enough to last me a couple days if I find some veg in the forest. Wish I had my bow back but at least I finagled the skills for bow and arrow making out of my guide so a little time and I can make another. Though I do want to rain on those thug’s parade. I guess I can pop by both the towns before I make a run for it. Just the knowledge that there is a source of food over here that won’t run out should get a few people’s attention. I couldn’t be the only one who pretended to be weak.’
The other two finish up before he can plan much more out and Jim can only shake his head at their luck. He killed a single rabbit and got a good chunk of meat. Those two idiots butcher three rabbits and only get a couple slivers of it. Still enough to add flavor to the gruel they hand out back at town but it isn’t like they will get to keep it.
First room cleared the three of them exit through the portal and report to the gruff guy. The two idiots complained that Jim had done nothing to help them but he just laughed. “As if I was going to join the fray with how you two were swinging your axes. I am surprised one of you didn’t lop the others nose off.”
The gruff guy grumbles a bit but doesn’t really say much about the incident. He knows just as well as most of the others what those two idiots are like in a fight. Though at the sight of meat he perks up. “Wonderful! Now none of you can tell anyone about this you hear? I can’t even imagine what kind of pain you would go through if either of the two lords found out you let loose this bit of info. Now that the first room is clear and we know there is something of worth to be had, everyone in!”
All twelve of the men shuffle through the portal and are soon making their way into the dungeon. A couple of them complain about people holding up the line as they bump into those in front being unable to see into the dungeon through the portal. This doesn’t last long as the gruff man gives them both a thwack to the head with the blunt side of his axe.
The group heads through the hallway and into the goat room. While it is a bit chaotic, there was no way three goats were ever going to take out a group of twelve armed men. A couple more rabbits escape into the next room but are soon dispatched as well. The gruff man is over the moon at this point with how much meat they will bring back. Thoughts of actually getting some causes him to urge the group forward.
In the vine room they kill the two goats but can’t seem to find anything else and head into the line of medium sized rooms killing as they go. The lone goat doesn’t even have a chance to sneak attack them from behind as the two idiots charge it right away. Past those rooms and into the big room the five goats with helmets do cause a bit of trouble.
Jim stays back for a moment when the group enters and face palms. The two idiots as ever charge forward without a care. This worked until now as there was never more than a few enemies in a room. The large room they now found themselves in on the other hand has five goats and they even have helmets. For once the goats have the upper hand and make great use of their helmets to counter charge the two bringing them down to the ground. Once there it is a matter of moments before they both die as the goats headbutt and stomp them to death.
A grisly sight but somewhat expected. Even the others who had gone into the room right behind the idiots have stopped their advance and just watch, unable or unwilling to help. A silence filled the room as both sides just stand there only to be broken as the gruff man orders everyone to attack.
Despite the goats' success there still isn’t much they can do against the ten men left in the group and are soon dead as well. At this point even with the goats only dropping a little bit of meat each the gruff guys pack is stuffed. He glances around and nods, “We should almost be through this place. Just got to see the core and we can head back for my reward. A goat and rabbit dungeon will make the lords very happy!”
With another order everyone proceeds through a hallway and rectangle room into another large place. Jim holds back again and the others laugh at his cowardice. At least they do until the guy in the lead eats a face full of ice and falls over dead. The panic that follows almost causes the group to run away but the gruff man, now holding two axes with a third on his belt, menaces them and orders them into the fight.
This moment of panic however is enough to get another man killed, this time by a goat with a spiked helm that slams into him. Now caught in the entrance to the room the group can’t take advantage of their numbers as five kobolds all attack together. Another man falls as the gruff guy gives up on the group and makes a run for it. Jim not far behind followed by the rest. They just don’t have the discipline nor armor to manage the fight.
Despite the appearance of being a cave most of the floor space has been smoothed out by the carpet of dirt and clovers so they have little trouble fleeing. That is until the vine room. Jim had already scouted out the terrain when they came through the first time so was able to avoid much trouble. The gruff man, not so much. He twists his ankle on a divot in the ground and takes a fall face first into the ground.
Jim sees his chance and as the man starts to get up, he feels a sharp pain as an axe slices through his Achilles tendon. Then a couple snaps and his back feels lighter. Through the pain the gruff man looks up just in time to see Jim run away with the pack full of meat.
Once out of sight Jim starts to run for real. Out of the dungeon he goes and towards not the forest but the town which is farther from it. With his new speed Jim reaches the town just as a crowd has formed. A couple of toughs are standing out front with grim looks on their faces. Jim slows down to a walk and heads towards them with the pack held against his chest. His face tight and his eyes dart back and forth.
The two thugs start to grin at this and one steps forward to receive the pack. However right before he gets it Jim kicks out and brings him down with a groin shot. A deep breath and Jim shouts, “The dungeon is full of goats! Lots of meat can be had by everyone there!” And he opens up the pack and tosses half the meat into the crowd.
Before the other thug can react Jim is off running towards the other town as a small riot forms behind with everyone fighting for the meat. The town by the forest is more ready for him with a small contingent of ten thugs waiting and the populace being held back by more. This doesn’t stop him and after a failed grab he vaults over them and repeats what he had said at the other town. Then once again he throws out the meat.
This time though he is a bit surrounded and his escape is trickier to pull off. Jim still manages it though and before backup can get there he has disappeared into the forest. It pained him a little to give up so much food but he didn’t have anyway to preserve it so this was a better use for it.