Serpentine Horn (Patreon)

Wondrous item, uncommon

This metal warhorn is coiled in a tight spiral and sculpted in the shape of a lunging serpent. You can use an action to blow the horn, which is audible out to a range of 150 feet. Each creature within 30 feet of you that can hear the horn must make a DC 13 Wisdom saving throw. On a failed save, a creature can't move in a straight line, and must zigzag, moving back and forth diagonally, toward its destination whenever it moves until the end of your next turn.

When measuring range or moving diagonally on a grid in this way, the first diagonal square counts as 5 feet, but the second diagonal square counts as 10 feet. This pattern of 5 feet and then 10 feet continues whenever you’re counting diagonally, even if you move horizontally or vertically between different bits of diagonal movement.

Each use of the horn's magic has a 10 percent chance of causing the horn to transform into a giant constrictor snake in the nearest unoccupied space, destroying the horn. The snake is hostile to you. It shares your initiative count but takes its turn immediately after yours.

"... alright, where was I... Behold my masterpiece! With this magnificent arcane machine, I will steal power from the gods themselves! I, Zadicus the Ascended, shall become unstoppa—"

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"For the love of—you know what, fine, you win, let's just get going with this battle already. I've got my sulfur and bat guano right here."