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Aiming for a positive mindset in 2021! (Patreon)

Published:
2021-01-03 18:06:39
Imported:
2021-07

Content

I'm focused on looking ahead and trying to maintain a more positive attitude about my creative efforts this year. Yes, there was a LOT that happened in 2020 that was out of our control, but I still feel I could have reacted better to the things, especially those related to my attempts at writing.

I've decided to be open about my shortcomings and 'put out there' how I hope to improve myself in 2021.

1) Stop comparing myself to other writers:  Everyone's situation is different, and each situation has its own set of pros and cons. Sometimes I'll find myself thinking, "It sure would be nice if I could write full-time like Author X! I could crank out all sorts of stuff in that situation. What a lucky duck they are!" But what I don't focus on, at least not initially, are the challenges Author X might be facing in their situation. Do they depend on their writing revenue to pay their mortgage/rent? If writing is their main income source, do they have to be super vigilant about every expense? Do they have wordcount goals that MUST be met every day/week to maintain their needed revenue streams? 

I don't know these answers, and again each situation is different, but perhaps they are dealing with writing pressures and stresses that I don't experience? Why am I so quick to assume another author's experience is more fulfilling or superior to mine? I need to focus on where I am and what I can accomplish, given my personal/work responsibilities and my season in life, and I need to train myself to congratulate those folks on their successes instead of envying them.

2) Accept where I am: I'm a 47-year-old guy responsible for representing my legal clients to the best of my ability each and every day. I prioritize being physically and emotionally available and open with my wife and spending fun time with her, as well as not-fun time with her (running a household, all the little daily grinds). I've got two kiddos who need my daily guidance and support. We even added a new pup to the family this year, and although he's sweet and smart, he's definitely added to my workload. 

I write all of of this to tell myself: Eric, writing is never going to be your 'main' thing. It's just not in the cards. Accept that, enjoy your life, and be satisfied with whatever writing time you can carve out in a way that doesn't deprioritize anything else listed above. Yes, sometimes I'll see a 20-something crushing it with their writing (see above!) and I'll suffer a flash of jealousy at their youth and (at least perceived) freedom, but that sort of thinking is toxic and doesn't help anyone. I'll probably never crush it like they do, but I have a lot of other non-writing positive things in my life; my family, my friends, my career, a relative level of financial stability and growth, and I need to focus on those things and accept my limitations as an author.

3) Shoot for quality, but not perfection: CCH3 has stalled partially because I've been worried to death that I'll disappoint people or that it just won't be good enough. I need to rid myself of that thinking. I need to accept that I can't please everyone, and that I'm still only about 350,000 words into my author journey. I'll be learning a LOT more as I continue, but the key is continuing. So I'm telling myself, no more worrying about "not good enough." I need to trust my gut and just focus on publishing stories I think are fun. Talon City is another example of this. Will anyone buy it? I'm not sure. But I've sunk a lot of work into it over the years and I probably just need to get.it.out. and stop second-guessing or worrying.

So there you go: no more comparisons with others, accepting my season in life, and shooting for fun, quality stories but not necessary more. I plan to revisit this post as often as I can to reinforce this mindset.

I'll message all patrons soon (today or tomorrow) with another RPG character sheet and a Sandy McCormick short story! Best wishes to everyone here, and best hopes for a better year in 2021.

*Oh and this is just a random pic of DG from Karl Sia from before I even knew him. There's no specific reason for posting it; I just really dig it.


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Comments

Rustem Khafizov

I think it's okay to feel negative emotions sometimes, they can even inspire more writing. For instance, my first game doesn't have the best reviews, but that inspired me to write another game with a distinct story and tone rather than a sequel to my first game that I was planning to make. In a way, I have more creative freedom now than I did before since I don't have to commit to making sequels. I would love to check out Talon City whenever it comes out! ^_^

ericmoser

Oh I agree it's healthy and normal to have some negative emotions, and yep I do think we can learn from them. BUT...I need to make sure I don't dwell on them or stew on them or use them as an excuse to stagnate. And yay for your creative freedom! Always feel free to let me know how it's going! Do you think you'll put a WIP on the forums or just work in mystery?

Anonymous

I have a lot of thoughts and I lack eloquence to properly put it all into the right words. However, I'd like to emphasize again that this is your story and yours alone. Even if I were disappointed by the ending, which I highly doubt will happen, I would cheer for you and be happy for you (and I’m sure I’m not alone in thinking so) because it is an immense accomplishment putting a series out there. More than most! There are millions of would-be writers; you’ve already proven you have it for real and will grow from here. I hope you won't be hard on yourself. More specifically, it's a little funny that you mention twinges of envy of the 20 somethings. Not in the laughing at your pain sense, but in mutual feeling opposite direction. Though I haven’t written on the same platforms yet, I’m one of those 20 somethings. And I could not be more wildly impressed by—and perhaps a tad jealous—of people like you. You may not have the ability to focus on writing alone, but you kill it at huge responsibilities while also killing it as a writer, and if that is not worthy of admiration, I don’t know what is supposed to be. It so often goes both ways! We'll always have those things we do not see in ourselves that we notice or respect about others. Some such about being our worst enemies, right? :) Writing is intrinsically valuable. Those personal joys are the most important things. That said, I mean it that your work has been so significant to me over the years too. It would have robbed so many people of that uniquely wonderful experience including you if you were not the writer YOU are, exactly as you are. You were right, it’s not good enough at all. Because whatever happens, it is excellent. You don’t need the encouragement; you have the stuff as they say. Still, hopefully it is a bit extrinsically motivating to hear anyhow. (This is having trouble posting and I'm not sure of the cause. If it turns out it has posted multiple times, it wasn't showing up for me so that's why!)

ericmoser
>>50734543

Haha, it's probably human nature to envy or at least do some "is the grass greener" type of wondering when it comes to people in vastly different situations than yours. There are trade-offs to every season of life, I suppose. When you get older, some random part of your body will crackle each time you rise from your chair, so look forward to that! I really appreciate the kind words and hearing your perspective! Stay Specktacular.