Holly & Elizabeth - Chapter 2 (Patreon)

"Mommy," Holly pouted, pulling her thumb out of her mouth, nose wrinkling as she stared at the object, "Do I have to?"

It was a stupid question... If Mommy asked her to do something, then of course she had to do it... Mommy didn't joke, certainly not about this sort of thing. She also never took chances, so there was only one way this was going to go, and Holly had no doubt it was the opposite of what she wanted.

She might not have thought it if it hadn't been for the e-mail - she wouldn't be in this situation without the e-mail either, for that matter - but it was strange, thinking about what it was she was protesting, what it was that she didn't want to do. Here she was, her extra-thick diapers, soggy as ever, bulging from beneath her frilly, bright yellow onesie, hair tied up in matching ribbons, whining because she didn't want to put on the pair of panties Mommy had presented her with.

If the version of her that had almost been in the show the e-mail had been about could see her now... She squirmed, blushing at the thought, imagining her old, somehow far more 'grown-up' doppelganger peering in through the full-length mirror, looking around at the nursery Holly had traded her own apartment in for, at the closet door, standing open at the moment, showing off her wardrobe of too-short dresses and shortalls, and lots of tops that had no accompanying bottoms, since they were meant to be worn with just her diapers.

And then there were the diapers themselves... Holly winced, seeing, in her mind's eye, the other her spotting the stacks of them waiting on the shelves by her changing table, turning back to her as she was now, seeing the plastic peeking out of the onesie's legbands, the bow-legged stance she was forced into, before sniffing the air, catching of whiff of baby powder and Holly's diaper pail, evidencing that they weren't for show.

They really, really weren't. When this had all started, Mommy had used a catheter and a hollow butt plug to help things along, to take away as much of her control as possible, to get her peeing and pooping her pants helplessly... Those hadn't been necessary in a very long time. Ten years, she thought with a shiver, thinking back to the e-mail. She'd been a baby now for ten years, far longer than she had when she was an actual infant... She'd need to be re-potty-trained to have a chance with those panties Mommy was offering her, and she suspected that would not be an easy task after all these years.

But, of course, that was the point. They both knew how this was going to end, yet that didn't stop Mommy from doing it, from enjoying the show. "Yes, you do," she crossed her arms. "If you want to go out and be an adult, you have to prove that you're capable of that."

"I'm not saying I'm an adult, Mommy," Holly said. "I know I'm not!" Her thumb drifted up to her mouth again, in a way that Mommy might have seen as her being manipulative, trying to prove her point... Or maybe she knew, by now, that it was instinct, that Holly couldn't help it... Yet another nail in the coffin of her supposed adulthood, she thought, seeing her reflection roll its eyes at her. "I'm your baby girl," she mumbled around it. "It just sounded fun, and..."

"And what do you think is going to happen?" Mommy asked. "You know I can't come to rehearsals with you, and you can't expect your babysitter to go and wait through them... You'd have to be there on your own, and that is a very grown-up thing to do, isn't it?"

Holly sucked harder on her thumb at the idea of being without her Mommy. It should have filled her with joy, being free of her for a couple weeks while she went away on a job, turning some other adult into an overgrown toddler, the way she'd done to Holly - or to Laura, really, since that had been what Holly had gone by, before her time with the woman, before she'd lost every vestige of her mature life, including her name - but, obviously, considering what a baby she was now, she couldn't be left alone...

There were times when Mommy would drop her off at a 24/7 daycare, where Holly would have to spend days surrounded by babies, treated like she was one of them, and trying to fit in, never knowing what Mommy had told the workers about her, if they knew the truth, if they thought she was a kid, a bit older than their other charges, but also a bit on the slow side, not quite having mastered the potty yet... All she knew for sure was that, no matter what had been said, they would definitely believe her Mommy over her, would assume anything she told them was her over-active imagination.

For longer trips, Mommy usually hired a babysitter instead. It seemed like that would be better, that at least Holly could stay at home, in her own crib, not have to pretend to be anything she wasn't... Except, she then had to deal with the sitter. Sometimes, they were another Nanny, like her Mommy was, and they had their own ideas of the proper way a baby like Holly should behave, and their own punishments for when she didn't. Other times they were Nannies in training, eager to try things out on her, knowing that, if she told them no, they could discipline her any way they saw fit, and that her Mommy would probably punish her again when she got home. And then, from time to time, she'd get an actual babysitter.

They were always eighteen or more, of course, and Holly had no clue how much of her situation Mommy explained to them before offering them the job. They tended to be less strict than the Nannies, though it was hard to tell for certain... The sting of the situation then was how much younger they were than Holly, and how they still had complete control over her, as if she weren't an adult, a former professional woman, as if she were nothing more than the toddler Mommy treated her as, had kept her as for a full decade now.

It was going to be one of those this time, and that, Holly suspected, was why Mommy was so resistant to letting her participate in the show. She could be wrong about that - maybe she didn't want Holly doing anything that reminded her of her old life - but she had a feeling that, if she was going to be under the care of someone more experienced, Mommy wouldn't have raised such a fuss. Even if they weren't by her side every minute, Holly would never have the guts to defy a Nanny's orders... Perhaps, if it was some girl, Mommy thought she might get some ideas about what she could get away with...

It was flattering, in a way... Or, she could be completely wrong about that. Mommy played her cards close to her vest, was as hard for Holly to read, even after all this time, as an adult's mind was for a real child. There could be some other reason Mommy didn't want her involved... She had no way of knowing, other than asking Mommy directly, and no hope that, if she did, she'd get an honest answer.

"I mean, when I was in shows, there'd be kids who got dropped off at the theater sometimes," she said, having to repeat the first half after Mommy plucked her thumb out of her mouth so she could understand her. "It happened..."

"And how old were those kids?" Mommy asked.

Holly shrugged. Guessing ages had never been her strong suit, and that had been a long time ago... And, really, that wasn't what happened most of the time anyway, parents usually sticking around, hanging out in the back few rows of seats, trying to stay out of the way, and snap a few stealth pictures of their little actor onstage. "Like, ten?"

Mommy chuckled, Holly wiggling in place, wondering if that had been too low an age to be believable, hoping Mommy wouldn't wash her mouth out with soap for lying, since she hadn't done it on purpose. "You think you're as mature as a ten year old?"

Holly let out a quick sigh of relief. "N-No, Mommy," she shook her head.

"You're closer to a ten month old, aren't you?" Mommy smirked, and, without hesitation, Holly nodded her agreement. "So, to you, that ten year old might as well be a grown-up, isn't that right?"

Holly squirmed, gaze returning to the mirror, to the younger version of her, in her suit and heels, waiting for her answer. "Y-Yes, Mommy," she admitted, to her reflection's dismay.

"And I don't imagine those grown-up ten years olds wore diapers, or had accidents in their pants, did they?" Mommy pressed.

Holly couldn't really say for sure, though she was pretty confident the answer was, "No, Mommy."

"Well, then, if you want to be like them, you need to prove to me that you can be as mature as them." Which, of course, brought them back to the panties. They were bubble-gum pink, covered in ribbons and lace, and they seemed thicker than most... Holly was far from the person to ask about that, however. The only panties she saw were those of her Mommy, and sometimes her other caretakers, if she was crawling beneath them and happened to glance up at the wrong time and saw up their skirts, or if Mommy wanted her to help with chores, in which case, she often found herself sitting in her soggy, or messy, diaper, folding what felt like a full laundry basket's worth of Mommy's underwear, forcing her to handle them one by one, see what she'd been denied for so long...

She ought to be excited, finally getting a chance to wear them again herself, no matter how immature they looked... But, baby or not, she wasn't stupid. She knew where this was going.

"We'd better get this off," Mommy said, unsnapping her onesie. "I don't want anything to stand in your way of getting to the potty on time!" As if her decade of training wasn't doing exactly that... "Uh-oh!" she chirped, giving the diaper underneath a poke. "Are you wet, sweetie?"

"Yes, Mommy," Holly replied, the padding warmer, and squishier, than the last time she'd paid attention to it, indicating she'd dribbled some more, not that it was a surprise at this point.

"Well, I'm sure you won't do that in your panties," Mommy shrugged, whisking Holly up onto her changing table to un-tape the diaper, clean the girl up. "After all, you're a big girl who can go do shows all by herself, aren't you?"

Holly stayed silent, wriggling on the table, feeling her reflection's eyes on her, making it hard for her to speak up, to tell Mommy to forget the whole thing, the specter of her former self reminding her of what she had been, of what she should be... She couldn't honestly say the opposite either, though, couldn't truly claim she wouldn't have any accidents when she knew there was almost nothing she could do about that. Instead, she kept her mouth shut, plugging it with her thumb, as Mommy wiped her dry, helped her sit up, her feet dangling above the ground, letting Mommy slip the panties over them, and up her legs.

"There we go!" Mommy beamed, lifting Holly down to the floor, sliding the underwear up their final ascent, letting them snap into place around Holly's waist. Had she been wrong about their thickness? At least compared to her diapers, it felt like she was wearing nothing at all, practically! "And, to make it even easier, I won't put you in pants, so you won't have to think about unbuttoning, or pulling anything down... Just lift your skirt and pull down your panties! It doesn't get any more convenient than that, does it?"

Holly had never seen the white dress Mommy produced from the closet, a clear indication that she'd bought it specifically for this, that she had no delusions about what its fate would be, as if the color of it hadn't been enough. Holly owned very little white clothing, and what she did have was for special occasions, for when Mommy wanted to parade her around in front of her Nanny friends and prove what a sweet, obedient baby she had, so well-behaved that she could even keep her clothes pristine and white... She always had double diapers for those times, however, to keep the threat of leaks to a minimum, and Mommy was extra careful when feeding her, in a way that she normally didn't bother with, delighting in making Holly look like a messy eater, despite both of them knowing it was Mommy who controlled the spoon.

"You do look more grown-up," Mommy commented, taking a step back to admire her work. Holly's reflection disagreed, looking her up and down. The dress was white, and longer than most of the ones in her closet, but it still looked like something that belonged in a toddler's closet, rather than any adult's. "Let's see if you can act that way, too."

Mommy knelt down, sliding something out from the bottom shelf of the changing table, hanging it on the wall, putting the final nail in Holly's hopes, however faint, that she had any shot at this. A potty training chart... She'd seen plenty of them over the years, and they'd never ended well for her. If she was getting uppity, or dared to suggest that she wasn't a baby, they'd come out, along with some Pull-Ups, to prove her wrong, leaving her with definitive proof that she didn't deserve to be out of diapers. Mommy had kept all of them on that shelf, although it had been years since she'd kept them hanging up as a visual diary of all the times Holly had tried, and failed, to go back to being a big girl.

She got a week, usually, and was tasked with lasting one day - any one day - without any accidents whatsoever. She'd never come close, had always been left with a shameful chart, one that a kid on their first week of potty training would be embarrassed of, much less someone who had been considered an adult until very recently. It was enough to keep her quiet about needing diapers for a month or two, at least, the duration stretching with each successive failure, to now, when she hadn't denied her babyhood for years.

This time, they didn't have a week; that, Holly assumed, was why Mommy had gone all out, jumping straight to panties, instead of the normal training pants. She wanted to make her point quickly, and obviously. Mommy was leaving in only a couple days, so Holly had to get an answer from her about the show now.

"And to show you that I'm willing to help, I'll let you use the potty right away," Mommy said, setting down a pink, plastic potty chair in the middle of the nursery, a sticker of a gold crown stuck to the lid. "Do you need to go?"

"M-Maybe?" Holly squeaked.

"Maybe?" Mommy raised her eyebrow. "Shouldn't you be able to tell, Little Miss Grown-Up?"

"I-I'll try," Holly corrected, shuffling over to the potty, lifting up the lid, sliding down her panties, and sitting. It was an odd sensation, one that made her feel so exposed, so vulnerable... Mommy had seen her wet and mess her diapers countless times, of course, but being there in the open, holding her dress up so it didn't get splashed, was something else altogether.

"You're not damp already, are you?" Mommy peered down at the panties dangling at Holly's knees, the girl blushing, pressing her legs together.

"N-No, Mommy," she fibbed. Almost as soon as they were on, she'd felt a few drops escape into the fabric, and that had continued almost the whole time since... It wasn't much, though, not enough, now, to make her potty trigger the cheerful little song she knew would play when it detected itself being used. She tried pushing, getting out what she could, but, by now, it had been so long since she'd done anything other than letting nature take its course, she wasn't positive she was doing it right.

That was probably the end of it, she thought as she gave up, yanking her panties up in defeat. Mommy would check her, see that she'd lied, mark it off on her chart, and declare her unfit for panties, or anything else grown-up, like the show.

"Since you're a big girl, in panties, I'm going to trust you," she said instead, to Holly's surprise. "If you stain your nice, new dress, though..." Too late, now that she was off the potty, her bladder spasmed in fear, sending a brief trickle of wetness into the girl's waiting undies, the cloth absorbing it... For now.

"Mommy," Holly whined, tugging at the hem of her dress, hoping that her adult reflection didn't know what she'd done, even though she knew it was all in her mind, so of course it did, "I don't wanna be punished..."

"Then don't have any accidents," Mommy told her simply. "Or... Tell me you don't want to do the show after all, and there's no need for this." Holly started to suck her thumb, unable to promise the first, or make herself say the second, trapped between them. "I'll tell you what, Holly," Mommy knelt down, "I'll give you an hour, and you can use the potty three times during it. If your dress is still nice and clean after that, I'll say that's good enough."

An hour... That wasn't so long, was it? It was better than trying to make it the whole rest of the day, definitely. And if she could get to the potty three times in it, she could space them out to hopefully minimize the damage of her dribbling bladder, right? "O-Okay," she nodded.

"And I have some good news for you!" Mommy said. "Your time already started, so it isn't even a full hour anymore! But... You did already use one of your potty chances."

That made it more difficult... Two trips to the potty in whatever was left of the hour? Could her panties hold up through that?

"Are you sure you want to try?" Mommy asked, sensing her doubt. "We can stop now, if you'd rather."

"I-I'll try," Holly told her quietly, and Mommy revealed the final card in her hand, leading her over to the little plastic table, with its little plastic chair, where Holly would do her coloring. Now, it was covered in worksheets.

"Big girls don't just sit around until they need to use the potty," Mommy explained. "They also have homework... So, I want you to finish all this up in the hour, too. Besides, it might come in handy... Your babysitter might need some help with hers, too, while she's here."

Holly's face turned bright red, thinking that she was going to be looked after by someone still young enough to have to worry about homework. "But it's summer!" she pointed out. Mommy didn't care, pointing at the plastic chair, not moving until Holly sank down into it and picked up her crayons.

None of it seemed particularly difficult... Or it wouldn't have been, at one time. Now, after ten years of playing with blocks and dolls, and watching mindless TV shows meant for toddlers, her brain felt like mush staring at the pages, the numbers on the math questions blurring together, the questions on the English quiz each looking as long and intimidating as a full novel, compared to the giant, simple text in her picture books.

Again, she felt her reflection watching, judging, reminding her of how she'd made it through college, with work far more challenging than this, and without peeing her pants even once. Now, she was struggling hard with a simple division problem, constantly debating about whether it was time to take her second trip to the potty or not. There was no clock in the nursery, no way for her to know how long it had been, how long she had left to go...

It certainly felt like a while, after answering as much on the math worksheet as she could manage. She squirmed in her seat, definitely noting a little more dampness, though, as far as she could tell, her dress wasn't wet yet. She scurried over to the potty, opening the lid again, sitting down... But, try as she might, she couldn't get anything more than the usual slow drip to come out.

On the way back to her chair, she had a stroke of genius, flaring her skirt out as she sat so that she wasn't sitting directly on it, hoping that would keep it safe. Almost instantly, Mommy was there, lifting her up, setting her back down properly. "No cheating," she scolded.

"S-Sorry," Holly stared down at her table. "Umm... H-How much longer do I have?"

Mommy checked her phone with a smirk. "Oh... Looks like about fifty minutes."

"D-Did you say fifteen?" Holly asked hopefully, Mommy shaking her head to let her know that she'd heard it correctly the first time. Not even ten minutes, and she'd already squandered two of her trips to the potty... How was she going to make it the rest of the hour?!

"Do you want to give up?" 

As hopeless as it looked, Holly still said, "No, Mommy." She had to try... She'd gotten this far, after all.

And then, a few minutes later, she heard her tummy rumble. She might not have a clock she could see, but she knew her body had a schedule when it came to that... And apparently Mommy had decided to hold this little test right in the middle of the time when Holly usually had her second messy diaper of the day, helped along by her fiber-rich, mush-centric diet, mostly baby food and oatmeal.

Could she remember how to do that on cue? After a pair of failures with her bladder, she wasn't confident... If she could time it just right, however, she might get lucky, might sit on the potty at the correct moment... She couldn't go too early, though, and risk being stuck sitting there, trying to push, not knowing if she was straining the correct muscles, or wasting her time...

Her handling of the crayon grew more wild, her words less legible, as she forced herself to keep working, keep waiting, every tiny grumble from within nearly sending her dashing for the potty... Until, suddenly, it was too late. She shifted in her seat, felt a sticky spot, her eyes widening as she noticed it growing, realized it had already begun. She did what she could to stop it, but, if she couldn't remember how to do it on purpose, she had no hope of recalling the correct muscles to halt the progress, even if they would have been strong enough to help.

She hopped to her feet, praying that she could make it to the potty before it got too bad, that her panties would be thick enough to protect the dress... But, as soon as her backside left the plastic seat, it was over, her undies filling with the warm, soft load, sagging beneath her skirt while, in the mirror, her reflection looked on in disgust, finally shaking its head and walking away, leaving her to her fate as she saw a brown stain growing on the back of her dress.

Automatically, as Mommy approached, Holly sat, regretting it immediately as the mush squelched beneath her. "I-I'm sorry, Mommy," she said quietly. "I-I tried..."

"I know you did, sweetie," Mommy smiled. "And you didn't give up early... That might not prove that you're a grown-up, but it does prove how much you want to do this. So... I'll let you do the show."

Holly gasped, her eyes widening in shock. "R-Really?!"

"If you want it this badly, then yes," Mommy told her. "You will have to wear your diapers, of course." Holly nodded eagerly, giving her Mommy a big hug as the woman chuckled. "All right, then... Let's go get you into the bath, stinky girl... And then we can get you your spanking for messing up your dress.

Holly pouted, and stuck her thumb back in her mouth, but she didn't protest. For one thing, she knew it wouldn't do her any good; for another, she'd been certain that was coming either way... She was just glad that she wasn't being denied her chance to be in the show, and see some of her old... 'friends'... on top of it.