Midnight Pals: Hogwarts Legacy (Patreon)

[mysterious circle of robed figures]
JK Rowling: hello children
Rowling: big newssss
Rowling: your favorite game issss finally available
Rowling: hogwartssss legacccy
Rowling: i hope you've all already purchasssed your 4 copiesss

Jesse Singal: i did! i bought 4 copies, dark lord!  
Graham Linehan: i bought 5  
Rowling: uh oh jessssse looks like someone's angling for your sssspot
Singal: but  
Rowling: come ssssit next to me graham, you're my new favorite

Linehan: really? even though i said fluorination was a gay jewish hoax by the reptiloids  
Rowling: oh yesss that ssssort of thing doesssn't bother me anymore  
Rowling: feeling pretty good about the company i'm keeping thessssse daysss

Singal: dark lord! dark lord! i have terrible news!  
Singal: people on the internet say that hogwarts legacy is mid!  
Singal: IGN gave it their LOWEST possible score!  
Singal: an 8 out of 10!  
Rowling: sssssss

Rowling: outrageoussss!  
Rowling: will the transss never be happy? i put a transsss character in it!  
Rowling: Manface L. Tiltedpelvis  
Singal: what's the L stand for  
Rowling: "Laryngeal Prominence"

Rowling: sssss i'm mad! I'm coiling mad!!!  
Rowling: the hogwartssss legacy quota hasss now been raisssed  
Rowling: you're each to buy 8 copiesss now!  
Singal: but dark lord  
Rowling: 10!!! 10 copiessss!!!