Happy New Beer(gut) (January 2023 Request) (Patreon)

Monthly Audio Request Winner: Jakisall

"It’s a new year, and with it comes new opportunity, and new experiences. For you that includes looking for a new wardrobe as you’re looking chubbier again as your opinionated family pointed out at the Christmas party.   But also means having some gifts, the under appreciated new socks, an assortment of shortbread, cheeses and jams… and a “Beer of the month” subscription? Who gave you this?

Nobody in your family drinks anything that doesn’t have a lineage from some European village you’ve never heard of, the snobs. Not that you’ve ever been much a fan, but hey, new year new things.  Sometime around the end of the month you get a delivery; a nondescript cardboard box with a six pack of some German sounding bottles. You let them chill and crack one open after supper while you watch TV. It’s musky and bubbly, not really your thing, but you’ve got the whole six pack, no need to waste any.

You belch as you lift yourself up to get another, are your pants a little tight?..."