Chapter 19 (Patreon)

Rob turned on Quick Thinking, taking the 3 Stamina per second loss on the nose. He had enough to spare.

First order of business: Party Screen.

Keira
Level: 29
Warrior Level: 26
HP: 35 / 250
Stamina: 69 / 300
MP: 90/250
Status Effects: Unconscious

Alia
Level: 20
Ranger Level: 16
HP: 82 / 240
Stamina: 57 / 270
MP: 120 / 120
Status Effects: Determined, Bleeding (Mild), Exhausted (Moderate)

Vul’to
Level: 16
Ranger Level: 13
HP: 55 / 200
Stamina: 99 / 210
MP: 170 / 170
Status Effects: Unconscious

Zamira
Level: 17
Ranger Level: 13
HP: 54 / 250
Stamina: 41 / 220
MP: 160 / 160
Status Effects: Unconscious, Bleeding (Mild), Concussed (Mild)

Tarric
Level: 17
Ranger Level: 14
HP: 56 / 210
Stamina: 58 / 240
MP: 150 / 150
Status Effects: Determined, Frantic, Exhausted (Moderate)

Everyone Unconscious was still Unconscious. Zamira had mostly stabilized. Alia and Tarric were flagging – he could only guess how many Baby Dungeon Spiders they’d been knocking down for hours on end and without rest. The trainees had been able to put down one Bestial Chimera before getting ganged up on by the rest of the monsters and retreating to the relative safety of the tower structure. That still left the Spider Queen and another Chimera to deal with. And looking back up the stairs, Rob was pretty sure that he and Orn’tol were functionally trapped. The Dungeon separated floors like different pocket dimensions; the tar monstrosity couldn’t follow them. But what if it was waiting for them when they went back up? That wasn’t a risk they could take.

The cavernous holes in the middle of the room were an advantage. Mostly. Would prevent the monsters from swarming them from all angles. And knocking the Bestial Chimera down one of the holes might be their best bet at defeating it. With that said, the openings in the ground were the very definition of a double-edged sword. There was nothing in them except empty darkness. Rob doubted they led anywhere at all; whoever fell down them would fall through a void of nothing until they starved to death.

He took stock of their traveling pouch. Five red HP Potions, four green Stamina Potions, 9 Firebombs, food, water. Rob winced as the motion of opening the pack made his back twinge. He was losing blood at a worrying rate, and by all rights he should have used Lifesurge already. Unless...

Rob took a quick glance at a certain Skill on his Character Sheet.

Quick Thinking Level Increased! 1 → 2

“Orn’tol,” he began, turning off Quick Thinking to conserve Stamina. “Get ready to run.” Rob carefully took out the Firebombs and handed the bag back to Orn’tol. “I’m about to piss off a lot of creepy crawlies.”

“Not enough Firebombs. Wouldn’t kill Queen even if all hit.”

“Don’t worry,” Rob said. He hefted the Firebomb, testing its weight, and gauged the distance between himself and the horde. “I’m completely terrified of spiders.”

“...I’m sorry?”

“Absolutely, dreadfully, scared to the bone of them.”

“Now I am confused.”

Rob decided to let results be his answer. He tossed the Firebomb in a wide arc, wincing as it flew off-course. Luckily, hitting the spider horde was like shooting fish in a barrel, but he needed to make sure his subsequent throws were more accurate.

Come on, Rob thought. That’s my Firebomb. I threw it. Any damage it causes came about as a result of my actions. Show me how bullshit you can be, system.

The little orb landed in a patch of Baby Dungeon Spiders and cracked open.

An incandescent bonfire of flame burst open. It was so bright that it left spots in Rob’s vision. The conflagration wasn’t any bigger than when Orn’tol had thrown it against the Creeping Shadow, but it was far more intense, instantly searing the spiders caught in the flame and baking the nearest surrounding spiders into crispy-fried creepy crawlies.

Rob grinned a grin that showed all of his teeth. Arachnophobia. +300% damage versus spiders. Fuckin’ A.

The spiders collectively froze. Queenie turned to face Rob and Orn’tol, and while Rob wasn’t an expert in spider body language, he could swear that she looked offended. Half the swarm abandoned the tower and started skittering over, the Queen herself slowly making her way across as well, taking care to avoid the holes in the floor.

“How?” Orn’tol gasped.

“Tell you later. Get moving.”

He didn’t need to be told twice. The ranger-in-training ran as Rob chucked more Firebombs at the impending swarm. One bomb, two, three. Spiders died in consuming flames. The Babies barely gave any EXP as they died, but each Firebomb took out a good 10-15 in one go, and he was so close. Come on come on come on-

Reached Level 12!
5 Stat Points Gained!

Berserker Level Increased! 2 → 3

Berserker Class Ability Learned!

Berserker Rank 1 Ability: Lifesteal (Passive)
Description: Heal yourself for 25% of any damage dealt to a living creature. Normal plants like trees and grass don’t count. No loopholes. Only works when the Berserker Class is equipped.
Prerequisite: Berserker Level 3

“Yeeeeees,” Rob exhaled. He wasted no further time, running straight towards the Spider Queen and her horde. There were only five Firebombs left and he didn’t want to waste a single one.

“HEY!” Rob yelled. He stopped once he’d gotten close enough. Very uncomfortably close enough. “CATCH THIS, YOU EIGHT-LEGGED BITCH!”

The beautiful orb of vengeance soared through the air and landed straight on the Spider Queen’s back. It exploded in cleansing fire, the Queen and her swarm screeching loudly in a dirge of pain. Rob’s HP rapidly refilled, the wound on his back closing and his broken finger mending as 25% of the damage he inflicted on the Spider Queen was turned into health and magically injected into his veins. It tingled.

“HAHAHAHAHAHA!” Rob laughed as he launched the rest of his payload. “YOU EXPECTED A FAIR FIGHT? FUCK THAT! EAT FIREBOMBS, YOU AFFRONT TO ALL THAT’S GOOD AND HOLY! YOU SCARED ME SO MUCH THAT I’M YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE!”

All five of Rob’s remaining Firebombs struck proud and true. The Queen screamed out its final death throes and collapsed into a burning heap of insect carapace. It smelled strangely like chicken. But mostly like victory.

Reached Level 13!
5 Stat Points Gained!

Reached Level 14!
5 Stat Points Gained!

The joy of Leveling High slammed into him. He was able to ignore it by focusing on the thrill of killing a bunch of spiders, because honestly speaking, the latter exceeded the former. By a hair.

Orn’tol coughed. Rob looked to the side and found the elf boy staring at him with a mixture of concerned judgement.

“...I really don’t like spiders,” Rob mumbled, sheepishly.

The two snapped back to attention. All of the Baby Dungeon Spiders had abandoned the tower entirely and were racing towards their mother’s murderer. There had to be at least 150 of them, and they were pissed.

Rob unsheathed his shortsword and mentally prepared himself. “Orn’tol. See if you can get the Potions to the others. Without engaging the Bestial Chimera. You’re my friend, and I don’t want to lose any more of those.”

Orn’tol glanced at the swarm, then at Rob, a wordless question on his face.

“I got this. Promise.” Rob smiled, and he managed to make it seem real. “I’m not dying here tonight.”

The elf boy nodded. His expression was full of trust. Rob vowed to make sure he wouldn’t betray it.

Orn’tol ran across one of the side pathways, giving a wide berth to the oncoming spider swarm, which was tunnel-visioned on taking the paths of least resistance to Rob.

Okay, Rob thought. I can kill each of them in one hit. I have Poison Resistance 5. I’ve got full HP, most of my Stamina, and a Lifesurge in my back pocket. And I can use the narrow pathways as chokepoints to reduce the number of spiders I have to fight at the same time.

I can do this. He clenched his sword in a white-knuckled grip. Beads of sweat ran down his forehead. The skittering of carapace running across stone grew louder.

I can do this.

–

Rob is crazy, Orn’tol thought. Forget Leveling High. He would be crazy even without that.

It was the kind of crazy he could put his faith in.

The Bestial Chimera hadn’t moved from its spot. It hadn’t cared one whit about the death of its compatriot, electing to continue pounding on the side of the tower in an unending rage. Whatever the tower was made out of, it was strong stuff, but cracks were starting to form in the side. It wouldn’t be long before the structure gave out.

Orn’tol considered his options. Two sides of the tower were pressed up against the corner of the cavern wall, leaving only two remaining sides open to the rest of the room. The Bestial Chimera was on the right side, Orn’tol was coming from the left side of the room, and there was a door to the tower at the bottom of its left side. And as the Chimera had just proven, it was very, very focused on its task.

Riardin will tan my hide if he ever finds out about what I’m about to do, Orn’tol thought. He activated Stealth, pressed up against the left wall into a crouch, and moved as quickly along the side as he could without making any noise. He considered activating Step of the Wind, but he’d never tried combining that with Stealth and wasn’t sure he could stay silent while moving that quickly. Quiet steps were more important than fast ones.

Stealth Level Increased! 1 → 2

Orn’tol did an internal double-take. The secondary Prerequisite for Stealth Level 2 was to have 25 Dexerity, and he still only had 20. And breaking prerequisites was hard. Unless you were a Human, but they had Fast Learner and thus didn’t count. For the other races, you needed to train like a madman or go through sufficient life experiences that the system decided you deserved to be recognized for your merit in going above and beyond your limits.

Which meant that what he was attempting here was even more dangerous than he’d expected. And his expectations were high.

Lothren, guide my steps, he prayed. Help me walk as if I was a whisper on the wind. I’m not ready to join your embrace yet. Malika still needs me.

He crept closer to the tower. It was forty feet away from him. Then thirty. Then twenty. He could hear the Bestial Chimera now; not just the incessant thrashing it was inflicting on the side of the tower, but also its growls of frustration bordering on mania. Little reverberations traveled through the air from the points of impact, causing loose pebbles on the ground to jump in surprise with every strike.

Orn’tol could see the beast closely now. The Chimera was as tall as three of himself stacked on top of each other. Green scales and coarse brown fur covered every inch of its body in interlocking waves with no discernible pattern. It was mostly humanoid in shape, but its upper half was bulkier and more thickly muscled than its bottom half. The mammalian body was topped off by a head like a lizard, containing beady black eyes and a long mouth full of razor-tipped teeth.

It was unlike any creature Orn’tol had ever seen. Or would ever see again, unless he came back to this very same Dungeon. Not even the most celebrated of elven artists had as much creativity as the Wounds in the World did when it came to fashioning walking abominations.

Orn’tol reached the base of the tower. It was vibrating with every blow the Chimera dealt it. He had no idea how it still stood – Dwarven masonry wouldn’t have been able to weather this kind of storm for so long – but Dungeons constructions were as tough or as soft as they wanted to be. Orn’tol crept very slowly and very carefully to the door at the base of the tower. The Chimera couldn’t see him from the angle it was at, but that didn’t mean it couldn’t hear him. Or smell him. The door was made of a thick metal with a doorknob and keyhole on one side. He twisted the doorknob.

It was locked.

Tadron, he cursed.

Orn’tol grabbed a lockpick out of his pocket and went to work. If only he could go back in time and kick his younger self hard in the rear for not paying closer attention to his lessons. ‘Why would I ever need to learn how to lockpick?’ he’d thought. ‘A Dungeon hasn’t appeared in Ixatan in ages. Why can’t we go back to Archery lessons?’ He’d said this out loud once, and Riardin had just muttered something about the follies of youth before heading over to grump at Keira for trying to break her lock with a hammer.

Lothren, if you guide me through this day, I’ll – on my honor – personally tell Riardin that every single one of his lessons was worth it. Even the mind-numbingly boring ones.

The lock opened with a click. Orn’tol sighed in relief. Then realized that he shouldn’t have been able to hear that click over the Chimera’s tantrum.

It had gone quiet.

Orn’tol tackled the door open and jumped inside as an arm as thick as his entire body grabbed at him. The tips of its fingers latched onto the edge of his boot and pulled. Orn’tol dropped his traveling pouch and drew his swords in one swift motion, drawing two crisscrossing red lines against the Chimera’s hand. It was like trying to cut through stone, but the wince of pain caused by receiving the equivalent of a papercut gave Orn’tol the moment he needed to slice his boot open and wriggle his foot free. He ran up the tower staircase in a flash, leaving behind the rantings and ravings of a beast that had lost hold of its prey.

Orn’tol’s heart was pounding in his ears. I’m almost there. The tower had been about twenty-five feet large from the outside, and unless it employed impossible geometry like the maze had, it shouldn’t be long before-

His head went up through an opening into another room, and was almost taken off by the blade that passed by his hairline.

“Stay back, you-, I-, Wha-, How-, Orn’tol?” Alia sputtered. “What in the gods’ names are you doing here?”

She looked, to put it kindly, like shit. Alia was drenched in sweat and blood and dirt, her silver hair matted and unevenly cut in various places that would take a hairdresser a whole day to salvage. Her chest heaved up and down with constant Deep Breathing, and even with that assistance her hands were shaking and barely able to hold onto her swords.

Orn’tol gave her a wan smile and held up his traveling bag. “I have Potions.”

“That’s the kindest thing anyone’s ever said to me,” Alia said. She grabbed the bag and began distributing Potions to their companions. Orn’tol examined their sorry states and found that Alia was somehow the best-off out of the bunch. Keira, Zamira, and Vul’to remained unconscious, with Zamira’s clothes being drenched in still-drying blood and the other two barely breathing. Alia carefully tipped HP Potions down their mouths, taking care to ensure that they swallowed every drop of life-saving red nectar.

From another corner of the room, Tarric got up off the floor like he was a corpse rising from his grave. “I must be hallucinating,” he said. “Because Orn’tol is here, and he’s come bearing gifts.”

“I’ll repeat my question: what in the gods’ name are you doing here?” Alia asked. She switched over to giving the downed trainees Stamina Potions. “I can scarcely imagine how you got past the Miasma Amalgamation, let alone the Spiders or the Chimera.”

Miasma Amalgamation? Is that what the tar monster was called? “We ran away from the Amalgamation. It was a closer call than was appreciated.” He was glad to be speaking Elvish again. Rob never gave him any strange looks, but Orn’tol knew his grasp on Common was questionable and must have come across as inelegant to a native speaker. “The Chimera I managed to sneak past...again, in a closer call than was appreciated, which seems to be tonight’s recurring theme. Rob killed the Spider Queen.”

Alia and Tarric turned to look at him with befuddled expressions. “Rob? The Human?” Tarric gaped at him. “He’s here and he beat the damn Spider Queen?”

“Burnt it to cinders,” Orn’tol replied, smiling. Even if it wasn’t his achievement, he was getting a kick out of the warring emotions on their faces. “Used some Rare Skill in conjunction with Firebombs, I think.”

Alia groaned. “Of course the Human would use a Skill the system gift-wrapped to him to save my skin. I’m not even allowed to be offended by that.” She gave the last remaining HP Potion a once-over before sticking it out towards Orn’tol. “You take it. I’ll be able to handle myself. Malika will beat me black and blue if I don’t make sure you come back in one piece.”

Orn’tol shook his head. “Thanks, but you can have it. I’m at full HP.”

She blinked once before presumably checking the Party Screen, eyebrows rising to the heavens. “So you are. The Human is not, though. What’s he doing?”

A high-pitched male scream, audible even over the Bestial Chimera’s continuous rampage, sounded throughout the cavern.

“...his best.”

–

“I’m sorry for killing your mom, okay?!” Rob yelled. “Can’t we just sit down and talk about this?!”

The Baby Dungeon Spiders declined his offer and skittered forward. Rob crept backwards up the staircase, using his shortsword to ward off any that got too close. Natural selection had funneled the twenty or so dumbest spiders straight into his sword; after that, the remaining ones were more carefully surrounding him, using numbers to distract him enough to create an opening. Their scratches and bites didn’t hurt very badly, but a death by a thousand cuts was still a death.

His plan to use the narrow pathways as chokepoints had worked. For a bit. Then they overran him from all sides and he was forced to withdraw to the staircase. It worked even better as a chokepoint, but they were slowly pushing him back up towards the top of the steps, where – considering his luck – the goo monsters awaited.

A spider leaped at him from the edge of his vision. Rob batted it aside, but not before its fangs scraped against his arm.

17 Biting Damage Taken!

Passive Skill Learned!
Name: Platelet Party
Prerequisite: Vitality 30, receive Bleeding (Moderate) on at least five different occasions.
Description: Your external and internal bleeding will fix itself slightly faster. The sources of the bleeding (such as a cut or a wound) will heal at the same rate as before.

Active Skill Learned!
Name: Not A Scratch
Prerequisite: Vitality 50, take damage from enemies at least 40 different times.
Description: Outright ignore the damage of a single attack from a single enemy. Physics still apply. Consumes 50 Stamina upon usage. Can be used once per day.

Rob’s attention was diverted by the several ‘Skill Learned’ messages that, by pure happenstance, managed to align with that one bite. He was distracted a moment too long; another spider seized upon the opportunity and pounced on his neck, fangs sinking in deep.

33 Biting Damage Taken!

Poison Resistance Level Increased! 5 → 6

He bashed the spider to bits. It fell apart in a shower of gooey carapace, but the fangs remained stuck on his neck. Rob retreated several steps back and took the moment of reprieve to rip the fangs out and toss them aside.

This sucks, was all he managed to think among the roaring torrent of fear and adrenaline coursing through him.

The problems with his heroic stand were becoming apparent. About fifty spiders had died, but there were still around a hundred left, and he simply did not have the Stamina to fight them all. His HP was in a bit of a better spot thanks to Lifesteal, but the Baby Spiders were weak enough that he barely got any health back from killing them, so the gains didn’t come close to outpacing the wounds and poison being inflicted upon him.

At least he didn’t have to worry about Leveling High this time, cause he wasn’t even going to fucking level! The Spiders were giving him as much relative EXP as the frogs had when he went around squishing them in Ixatan. They were too weak and too beneath him for the system to care. Maybe, maybe he would level a single time if he killed all 150~ of them, but it wasn’t a guarantee.

Not that I would know what to use those points on anyway, Rob thought. He still had 15 points left unspent from his recent three levels, and was currently paralyzed by indecision. Endurance was probably the most useful at the moment, and would help him outlast the swarm, but all it would take was for the spiders to land a few lucky hits and he would be regretting not saving those points for a Vitality bump. Dexterity was out, as he had little room to move and not enough time to get used to his new speed. Perception wouldn’t have number-based gains but he was starting to notice how many things he was getting hit by because he was an instant too late to see them coming.

But what he really wanted to use the points on was Strength. There was still the Bestial Chimera left to deal with, and it looked like a real tough son of a bitch. If Keira didn’t get back on her feet, they might not be able to do enough damage to kill it without Rob boosting his Strength. But Strength wouldn’t help him survive the spiders, and he couldn’t fight the Chimera if he was dead.

Rob knew that there was a smart way to go about this. Some rationally expedient way to distribute his stats that covered all his bases. And maybe he would have been able to think of that solution if there weren’t A LEGION OF SPIDERS IN FRONT OF HIM.

He crept a few more steps backwards. The entire horde was on the staircase now, crawling and skittering over each other in their zeal to devour the human that had orphaned them. Rob looked at the army of spiders at his front, then the darkness of the second floor at his back, and decided he no longer had any fucks to give.

“This is going to hurt so bad,” Rob said as he jumped. The Amazing Flying Human’s career was short-lived; he soared over the entire height of the long staircase, feet brushing against the backs of some very confused spiders, and landed at the base of the stairs. On both legs. Hard.

72 Falling Damage Taken!

Status Effect: Broken Left Leg (Severe)

Status Effect: Broken Right Leg (Moderate)

Status Effect: Multiple Leg Fractures (Moderate)

Passive Skill Learned!
Name: Vitamin D(efense)
Prerequisite: Vitality 30, break bones on at least five difference occasions.
Description: Your bones are slightly more durable and will heal slightly faster.

Vitamin D(efense) Level Increased! 1 → 2

That would have been a real nice ability to have five seconds ago. Rob didn’t hesitate to use Lifesurge this time, watching in morbid fascination as the bumpy lumps pushing up painfully from inside his legs proceeded to sink back inward and put themselves back together.

HP: 367 / 500
Stamina: 60 / 150
Status Effects: Leveling High (Mild), Fucking Tired (Moderate), Determined, Bleeding (Mild), Left Leg Fracture (Minor)

Some minor cuts were still present, and his left leg wasn’t all the way fixed, but the important thing was that he could function. Rob turned to face the spiders on the staircase. Some of them had noticed where he was, but most of them were crawling around in confusion. Rob cut through the first line of defense like a weed whacker through a flower bed, grinning as he advanced slowly up the staircase that the spiders were now trapped in.

“Turns out I’m not locked in here with you,” he crowed. “You’re locked in here with me! And I hate that there’s no one in the world who would get that reference!”

–

Orn’tol’s heart dropped to the bottom of his chest when he saw Rob’s HP on the Party Screen plummet by almost a hundred in the span of a second, accompanied by a glut of Status Effects describing the Human’s shattered legs. The elf’s mood reversed hard enough to give him whiplash when he saw that very same HP shoot back up again as the majority of the Status Effects disappeared.

I suppose he’s got it covered, Orn’tol thought, numbly, closing the Party Screen. “Are any of them awake?”

Tarric shook his head and sighed. He had a bit more color in his face after imbibing one of each kind of Potion, but only in the sense that he went from looking like the walking dead to ‘only’ looking like he hadn’t slept for a week. “They’re not in any danger of dying, but only Lothren knows when they’ll be up and about, let alone ready to engage in combat against the Bestial Chimera.” A glimmer of shame passed through his features. “He shouldn’t have protected me,” Tarric muttered.

Orn’tol put a hand on the man’s shoulder. That was as far as his efforts at consoling him would go; Tarric was prickly at the best of times and Orn’tol knew he himself wasn’t the greatest of orators even around people who spoke his language. “What happened, exactly?” He asked Alia.

She opened her mouth to answer. The Chimera landed a particularly vicious punch on the side of the tower, causing a tremor to travel up through their bodies. They held their breaths, waiting to see if this would be the moment when the beast broke through, imagining a giant hand tearing through stone to grab at them and crush their bodies into unrecognizable pulps.

The tower held. Three elves exhaled.

“As I was about to say,” Alia said, with a quiver in her tone that wasn’t because of the tower shaking. “We fought through the spiders on the first floor easily enough. Got scratched a few times here and there, but that’s all. Came upon some Creeping Shadows, and that was worrying, but Keira zapped them and we kept moving. The maze was a massive pain in the ass but we were careful in our advance. Zamira got tagged by one trap, but she dodged quickly enough to keep the wound from being too serious. HP Potion fixed her up.”

Her eyes took on a hollow look. “Then the black tar came out of the walls. I’ve...I’ve never even heard of something like the Miasma Amalgamation. We used Identify on it, and do you know what we learned? Nothing. Just the name. No Level, no Status, no Description. Our arrows sunk into its body and vanished, Keira’s Lightning spell bounced off, and it absorbed one of Tarric’s swords when he cut it. All we could do was run. If we’d taken one wrong turn...”

She trailed off. Tarric stepped in to finish in her stead. “This floor was empty when we got down. There wasn’t another staircase, so we were confused about whether or not this was the end of the Dungeon, and where the Core was, and all that. Then the two Bestial Chimeras materialized out of thin air in a matter of seconds and everything went to shit. Managed to keep one busy enough for Keira to bash its brains in, but by then Vul’to and Zamira were downed and our supply of Potions had fallen down a hole. Then the spiders came and Keira almost died escorting us as we brought the others to the tower where it was safe.”

Tarric grimaced and spat on the floor. “Hah. ’Safe’. Just a stay of execution is all it is. These walls aren’t unbreakable. We’ve already heard them crack a few times. Alia and I can try and fight, but...” He gestured to their thoroughly bedraggled selves.

Orn’tol stood up and looked them both in the eyes. “I’m a Ranger too.”

“Now isn’t the time for grandstanding,” Alia snapped. “You’re a trainee. And yes, I know we are too, but we’re a hell of a lot closer to earning our stripes than you are.”

“I’m well aware,” Orn’tol replied, coldly. “But this trainee here is in better condition than both of you combined, even after you took the Potions. You can barely stand, let alone fight.”

Tarric limped forward and grabbed Orn’tol by the shoulders. He glared, furious, before his anger morphed into resentment. “Vul’to took a hit for me,” Tarric said, and Orn’tol realized the resentment was directed inward, not outward. “Should be me on that floor there. And now you’re telling me to let you go out and fight in my stead? No. Won’t have it.”

“It’s not like I’m going out right this second.”

The side of the tower cracked loudly. And cracked more in the second blow that came after. And more in the third.

“You’d think I would have learned not to tempt fate, in all its capricious ways.”

Orn’tol wrestled out of Tarric’s grip and jumped to the top of the stairs. “I’m not saying I should fight it alone,” he said, grinning a little despite himself. “You’ll be joining me after resting a bit longer, right? Can’t let the trainee outdo you.” He was down the stairs before they could respond.

And I called Rob crazy, Orn’tol thought. He burst out the door at the bottom of the stairs, ran halfway across the cavern, whirled, and fired an arrow. It struck the Chimera in its foot. The beast flinched like it had been stung by a bee and turned baleful eyes on Orn’tol.

Orn’tol shot another arrow. Death approached, and the boy ran.

I’m going to make it home, he declared. Not to Lothren, but to himself.

–

Berserker Level Increased! 3 → 4

Berserker Level Increased! 4 → 5

The nice thing about raising your Class is that since they start at Level 1 and go up at roughly the same rate that normal Levels do, it doesn’t take much EXP to bump up their early numbers.

The bad thing was that he didn’t get a new Berserker ability until Class Level 7, so it wasn’t much of a help either way.

Swordsmanship Level Increased! 4 → 5

Rob didn’t want to look a gift horse in the mouth, but an objective part of him wanted to file a complaint and speak to the manager of the system. He’d trained with his sword for several weeks with the other trainees, and in those spars he had to learn the ins and outs of swordsmanship to try and keep up. They taught Rob to adjust his grip, to improve his footwork, to understand – and overcome – his limits.

Right now he was just weed whacking. The spiders had been backed into a corner with nowhere to go. They still got in a few decent hits on him, but overall they were as coordinated as a crowd of Black Friday shoppers who’d just been informed there was a 90% off sale in Aisle 12. Finishing them off was busy work. Fun busy work, but still busy work. How was that more valuable to his Swordsmanship than actual Swordsmanship training? Did the system give that much extra weight to being in a dangerous situation?

The last ten spiders took one look at Rob and nope’d the fuck out. They ran up into the darkness separating the second floor from the third floor and vanished. One spider changed its mind at the last second, trying to turn around when it was halfway through the dark, only to be severed in two, its lower half bouncing down the stairs and covered in black tar.

Rob was very glad he hadn’t tried to escape back up to the second floor.

‘Character Sheet’.

HP: 413 / 500
Stamina: 11 / 150
Status Effects: Leveling High (Mild), Fucking Tired (Moderate), Determined, Bleeding (Mild), Broken Left Leg (Minor)

He’d gotten a decent amount of HP back from Lifesteal. His Stamina, though…

“ROB!”

Whirling around to find the source of his name, Rob watched in horror as Orn’tol ran away from the Bestial Chimera. Several arrows stuck the Chimera in various places, none of which seemed to bother it in the slightest as it rampaged towards the boy. It was far faster, moving at Orn’tol like a truck headed full speed towards a cat crossing the road. Orn’tol dodged around the creature at the last moment, weaving between the Chimera’s lumbering strikes and leaving two shallow cuts on its ankles as he retreated to the other side of the cavern. The beast roared in frustration and turned to face Orn’tol with bared teeth and eyes full of rage.

Rob put five stat points into Endurance, hitting the 20 Endurance milestone and raising his current and maximum Stamina by 50, and ran.

Fleet of Foot Level Increased! 1 → 2

Deep Breathing Level Increased! 1→ 2

He slowed down a little when he had to cross the narrow pathways bridging across the holes to oblivion, forcing himself to keep a steady pace even as his gut churned into knots. He made crossing this look so easy. Just scampered on past. Fucking elves and their bullshit nimble grace, bunch of ballerinas with bows and swords and attitudes. Rob managed to make it to the other side while keeping all his food in his stomach, crossing over just in time to watch the Bestial Chimera toss Orn’tol over his shoulder like an unwanted pair of Birthday present socks. Rob caught the boy in mid-air and set him down.

“Rob,” Orn’tol said, smiling. “Chimera threw me. Made him mad.”

“If that was your goal, you certainly succeeded.” The Chimera sized them up, quickly coming to terms with the idea that it had to crush two enemies instead of one. “You have any other plans?”

“Survive until Alia and Tarric come help.”

“I see. And if they don’t come help?”

“...hit it in the head really hard?”

Rob brandished his shortsword at the Bestial Chimera. “So we’re David and it’s Goliath. I’ll tell you that story if we live through this.”

“Oh, I know that story.”

Rob’s jaw dropped. “You do?”

The Bestial Chimera cut off any further conversation with a savage roar that shook the cavern. It half-ran, half-loped towards them at speeds that made Rob wish he also had bullshit elf ballerina reflexes. He had to settle for throwing himself to the side as a green-and-brown mach truck crashed into the wall behind him.

That was too close. Can’t guarantee I’ll be able to do that again. Gaaaah, fine. He put five stat points into Dexterity, leaving five left in the bank. One day, Perception. One day.

Rob kept running, willing himself to adjust to the increase in speed before the Chimera charged again. His balance was a little unsteady, but acclimating to 5 points was a hell of a lot easier than acclimating to 15. Even if it was making his head pound for some reason. Orn’tol shot two more arrows that tagged the beast’s back legs, which didn’t do much to hurt it but did serve to distract it long enough for Rob to circle back around.

He glanced at his shortsword as he charged. Dwarven steel, Riardin had said. Was it sharp enough to cut through the hide of a monster twice his level, when he still only had 15 Strength? It certainly would if it was as sharp as the fucking headache building in his temples. Rob tried to put the impending migraine out of his mind, but couldn’t. That’s where migraines live and he didn’t have the proper eviction notice. Rob sliced at the Chimera’s tendon while running at full sprint, realizing two things after finishing his medieval drive-by.

First: 15 Strength and a badass sword wasn’t enough to do more than superficial damage.

Second: The last time his head had felt this bad was when he’d tried to learn Auto-Translate.

Rob dropped his sword and collapsed, skidding to the ground as he held his throbbing head in his hands. The world was blurring and shifting in a kaleidoscope of painful colors. Orn’tol was yelling something, the Chimera was approaching, and he didn’t care because all that mattered was that they were making more sounds that were piercing straight into his brain and why couldn’t everything just be quiet?

12 Localized Brain Damage Received!

“Fffffffffuck you,” Rob spat. “That’s not happening again.” He focused inward, grabbing at his scattered thoughts before they could float away, compressing all that made Rob who he was into a tight sphere and holding it there with all his might. The sphere thrashed and struggled and threatened to burst, but he held on, knowing that the instant he let go, the cork would rocket off the bottle and all that was Rob would come spilling out into an unusable mess on the floor.

The Chimera loomed over him. It drew back a massive fist, veins popping out of flexing muscles.

‘Not A Scratch’, Rob managed to think, barely.

Everything went black.



Because he had been punched in the face. Was kinda hard to see past a giant monster fist covering his eyes. He could still read the messages that popped up though.

Ability ‘Not A Scratch’ Activated!

372 Damage nullified by ‘Not A Scratch!’

System-Side Error Detected! Should have already learned Skill: ‘Step of the Wind!’ Correcting…

Active Skill Learned!
Name: Step of the Wind
Prerequisite: Dexterity 20, devote a significant amount of time to running and moving quickly.
Description: Increases Dexterity by +5 for 30 seconds. 5 minute cooldown.

Step of the Wind Level Increased! 1 → 2

Step of the Wind Level Increased! 2 → 3

Step of the Wind Level Increased! 3 → 4

Rob’s body tingled with an influx of EXP. After killing all those spiders and learning and upgrading so many Skills, he could sense that he was very close to hitting Level 15. He would be celebrating that more if he wasn’t already celebrating the incredible sense of relief that flowed through him as the migraine receded, his brain bits properly left where they all should be.

He smiled. The Chimera stared. It glanced at Rob, then at its fist, like it couldn’t puzzle out how none of Rob’s blood was splattered onto it. With a monstrous shrug, it reared back again for a second punch, because if punching hasn’t worked yet it just means you need to punch more. Several more arrows lodged into the Chimera’s back, but it ignored them, completely focused on squashing the stubborn gnat in front of it.

Rob tried to get up. And couldn’t. The first punch had physically depressed his body into the ground, making a Rob-shaped hole straight out of Looney Tunes, which was less funny when it was about to happen again after he had already used up his daily get-out-of-jail-free card. He’d need an extra second to extricate himself, and he didn’t have that long.

Tarric ran into vision, feet shrouded in green wind as he dragged his sword across pre-existing cuts in the Bestial Chimera’s ankles, deepening the wounds. The Chimera slouched in pain, just a little, but it gave Alia the leverage she needed to jump onto the beast’s back and quickly ascend up to its neck with sword-stabbed handholds. She screeched like a banshee into its ear and started laying into the Chimera’s neck with both swords, her blades a red-tinged blur that lacerated the creature's neck into bloody ribbons.

The Bestial Chimera cried out in pain – true pain, not the grunts of annoyance it had let out when hit with arrows. It grabbed Alia off of its neck and baseball-threw her at the wall. Rob witnessed the limit of elven bullshit ballerina grace as Alia tried to hit the wall feet-first, failed, and slammed into it at an angle that she would definitely be feeling in the morning. Tarric ran off to help her, leaving Rob alone with the Chimera once again.

He hadn’t wasted the time they’d given him. Rob pulled himself up out of the ground, ran to grab his sword where he’d dropped it, and went for broke by adding his last five unspent stat points into Strength, bringing it up to 20.

Strength Milestone Reached!

Active Skill Learned!
Name: Bulk Up
Prerequisite: Strength 20, devote a significant portion of time to training your muscles.
Description: Increases Strength by +5 for 30 seconds. 5 minute cooldown.

Bulk Up Level Increased! 1 → 2

Active Skill Learned!
Name: Power Slash
Prerequisite: Strength 20, hit ten worthwhile enemies with a full-strength attack while wielding a shortsword or longsword.
Description: Damage of next melee sword attack is increased by 5%. 5 minute cooldown.

Reached Level 15!
5 Stat Points Gained!

Rob exhaled in ecstasy. There was something so sweet about Leveling Up by upgrading and learning Skills. Leveling by getting a solid chunk of EXP from defeating an enemy was like digging into a full-course meal; this was like enjoying a whole bag of bite-sized candies, savoring how each one brought you a little closer to satisfaction.

And he wasn’t even done yet. Rob took the 5 points he had just gained and put them all into Strength once more, bringing it to 25.

Strength Milestone Reached!

Bulk Up Level Increased! 2 → 3

Power Slash Level Increased! 1 → 2

His muscles expanded, then compressed, compacting into indescribably stronger versions of themselves. Little about his outward appearance had changed, but he knew that as he was now, he could give bodybuilding champions back on Earth a run for their money. Which was good, because he needed that power. He needed all of that and more.

Rob took a stance and faced the Chimera.

‘Bulk Up’. His muscles tightened further. He was Schwarzenegger compacted into an average guy’s frame.

‘Step of the Wind’. Green wind encircled his feet. It wouldn’t make him stronger, but momentum would.

‘Power Slash’. His sword glimmered red around the edges.

Rob charged. He brought his shortsword back into an overhead, two-handed swung, and brought it crashing down onto the beast’s chest. Blood fountained out in a crimson geyser as the Chimera howled in agony. A savage grin spread across Rob’s face. His blade had cut deep.

Very deep.

But not deep enough.

Rob came down from his Leveling High about the same time that he remembered that the Bestial Chimera was still a giant monster, and still twice his Level.

The Chimera punched Rob full-on in the chest. He tried to dodge, but he still wasn’t entirely used to his 5 Dexterity bump and definitely not used to the extra boost from Step of the Wind. All he managed was to turn a crushing blow into a glancing one that sent him flying across the room. Rob skidded across the cavern floor for the second time in so many minutes. It was only when he started to fall that he realized just how far he had been sent. Rob desperately stabbed forward and found merciful rock, leaving him hanging off his sword over the edge of one of the holes to oblivion.

Tough Skin Level Increased! 2 → 3

His hands were shaking, both out of fear and pain. This reminded him too much of the cliff for him to keep his cool. Rob tried pulling himself up, but everything hurt so much. Were his arms broken? His arms might be broken.

Vitamin D(efense) Level Increased! 2 → 3

Fat load of help you were. Rob laboriously pulled himself over the edge, gritting through the pain, but the Chimera was already charging. He wasn’t sure if he could get out of the way in time.

Then Orn’tol shimmered into place in front of him, green wind lapping around the boy’s ankles. The ranger turned his bow horizontally, took out two arrows, and nocked them both at the same time. Each arrowtip started to glow a different color; one white, one red. He held his ground as the Chimera charged closer, closer, not moving even as the lumbering beast reared a fist back to smash him into the ground.

Orn’tol whispered a few words in Elvish, and the arrows flew. Each one shot forth like a bullet, puncturing through both of the Chimera’s eyes and out the back of its head. The Chimera screamed in agony as it brought down its fist onto Orn’tol, slamming him into the ground with a sickening crunch. It shambled forward, punching the air in a blind fury, as it walked straight past Rob and into the cavern hole. The Bestial Chimera flailed in panic as it fell into the void, its confused screams becoming more and more inaudible until finally, it disappeared entirely from sight and sound.

Rob ignored his pain and shambled over to Orn’tol as fast as he could. It wasn’t a solid hit, the Chimera was blind, can’t have been at full strength, PARTY SCREEN.

Orn’tol
Level: 14
Ranger Level: 10
HP: 4 / 150
Stamina: 104 / 140
MP: 100 / 100
Status Effects: Internal Bleeding (Minor), Numerous Broken Bones, Fading

Rob turned on Quick Thinking. He barely had any Stamina left but who fucking cared. What can I do, what is there, what do I have-

No. Not what do I have. What does Orn’tol have?

The last time Rob had checked, the boy had been Level 12.

“ORN’TOL!” Rob yelled. “PUT IT ALL INTO VITALITY!”

A few miserable seconds passed.

Orn’tol’s body shuddered. Wounds closed, bones creaked together, and his breathing strengthened as his body reassembled itself. Rob checked the Party List again at the same time Orn’tol’s eyes fluttered open.

Orn’tol
Level: 14
Ranger Level: 10
HP: 101 / 250
Stamina: 101 / 140
MP: 100 / 100
Status Effects: Numerous Broken Bones

Rob smiled in amazement as Orn’tol gave him a thumbs-up. “Two arrows,” the elf said. “Two Levels. Pretty good trade.”

He couldn’t help it. Rob snorted, his broken ribs convulsing in pain as he tried to keep himself from laughing like a lunatic. “Pretty good trade indeed.” Rob raised his palm vertically and held it out to Orn’tol. The elf stared at him in confusion, prompting Rob to explain.

And that was how, on that day, on the third floor of an irregular dungeon, after living through a harsh battle by the skin of his teeth, an Elatran was taught how to do the first high-five in history.

--

Character Sheet
Name: Rob
Level: 15
Race: Human
Class: Berserker (LV 5)

HP: 301 / 500
Stamina: 27 / 200
MP: 50 / 50

Status Effects: Leveling High (Mild), Fucking Tired (Mild), Determined, Internal Bleeding (Mild), Broken Right Arm (Moderate), Broken Right Arm (Mild), Broken Ribs (Moderate)

Strength: 25
Vitality: 50
Endurance: 20
Dexterity: 35
Perception: 12
Mind: 22
Magic: 5
Unspent Points: 0

Class Skills:
Berserker Rank 1 – Lifesteal

Active Skills:
Strength – Bulk Up (LV 3), Power Slash (LV 2)
Vitality – Do Not Go Gently (LV 1) (RARE), Lifesurge (LV 1), Not A Scratch (LV 1)
Endurance – N/A
Dexterity – Stealth (LV 1)
Perception – N/A
Mind – Identify (LV 2), Recall (LV 1), Quick Thinking (LV 2), Auto-Translate (Elvish)
Magic – N/A

Passive Skills:
Human Racial Bonus – Fast Learner
Strength – Climbing (LV 2), Brawling (LV 3)
Vitality – Regeneration (LV 4), Tough Skin (LV 3), Poison Resistance (LV 6), Disease Resistance (LV 3), Platelet Party (LV 1), Vitamin D(efense) (LV 3)
Endurance – Deep Breathing (LV 2)
Dexterity – Swordsmanship (LV 5), Fleet of Foot (LV 2)
Perception – Foraging (LV 1), Hunting (LV 2)
Mind – Speed Reading (LV 2), Diplomacy (LV 3), Arachnophobia (LV 2) (RARE), Mathematics (LV 4), Leadership (LV 1), Melancholy Resistance (LV 2) (RARE) (Deactivated), ???
Magic – N/A

--

Class Skills

Berserker Rank 1 Ability: Lifesteal (Passive)
Description: Heal yourself for 25% of any damage dealt to a living creature. Normal plants like trees and grass don’t count. No loopholes. Only works when the Berserker Class is equipped.
Prerequisite: Berserker Level 3


Active Skills

Name: Bulk Up (LV 3)
Prerequisite: Strength 30, devote a significant portion of time to training your muscles.
Description: Increases Strength by +7 for 30 seconds. 5 minute cooldown.

Name: Power Slash (LV 2)
Prerequisite: Strength 25, hit fifteen worthwhile enemies with a full-strength attack while wielding a shortsword or longsword.
Description: Damage of next melee sword attack is increased by 10%. 5 minute cooldown.

Name: Do Not Go Gently (LV 1) (RARE)
Prerequisites: Vitality 10, Go through a Near-Death Experience, Exhibit the Unyielding Will to Survive.
Description: When HP falls below 25%, double Vitality and double the effectiveness of all defense and Vitality-based skills.
Duration: 1 Minute.
Cooldown: 15 Minutes.

Name: Lifesurge (LV 1)
Prerequisite: Vitality 50, fall below 5% of your Max HP at least one.
Description: Rapidly restores 30% of your Max HP.
Cooldown: 24 hours.

Name: Not A Scratch (LV 1)
Prerequisite: Vitality 50, take damage from enemies at least 40 different times.
Description: Outright ignore the damage of a single attack from a single enemy. Physics still apply. Consumes 50 Stamina upon usage. Can be used once per day.

Name: Stealth (LV 1)
Prerequisite: 15 Dexterity, successfully sneak by someone or something at least once.
Description: Get a little better at taking quiet steps and appearing unobtrusive. Drains 1 Stamina per second in use.

Name: Step of the Wind (LV 4)
Prerequisite: Dexterity 35, devote a significant amount of time to running and moving quickly.
Description: Increases Dexterity by +8 for 30 seconds. 5 minute cooldown.

Name: Identify (LV 2)
Prerequisites: Mind 15, spend at least one year of your life specifically seeking out new knowledge.
Description: Imparts knowledge of the scanned object to the user.
Cooldown: 1 Minute

Name: Recall (LV 1)
Prerequisites: Mind 15
Description: Activate to permanently remember any written or spoken words read/heard by the user within the last five minutes. Words committed to memory through Recall can be forgotten at-will at any time. Max 200 words stored.
Cooldown: 1 Hour

Name: Quick Thinking (LV 2)
Prerequisite: Mind 25
Description: Slightly improves your speed of thought. Drains 3 Stamina per second while active. Mentally taxing when used for too long.

Name: Auto-Translate (Elvish)
Prerequisite: 30 Mind, read at least 30 worthwhile books, spend some time learning the Elvish language.
Description: Automatically translates any Elvish writing you read into English.


Passive Skills

Name: Climbing (LV 2)
Prerequisite: Endurance 10, Dexterity 10, climb up harsh terrain for at least five feet, climb a terrain without pre-made footholds.
Description: Tap into your latent monkey DNA to get better at climbing.

Name: Brawling (LV 3)
Prerequisite: Strength 15, Dexterity 15, participate in a fight while unarmed, and defeat at least one worthwhile opponent while unarmed.
Description: Become more proficient with humanity’s oldest weapons.

Name: Regeneration (LV 4)
Prerequisite: Vitality 50
Description: Heals 40% of Max HP every hour.

Name: Tough Skin (LV 3)
Prerequisite: Vitality 40, take grievous physical damage at least twice.
Description: Reduces physical damage incurred by 20%.

Name: Poison Resistance (LV 6)
Prerequisite: Vitality 50, endure prolonged poison damage
Description: Gain resistance to the damage caused by foreign, damaging substances in your body.

Name: Disease Resistance (LV 3)
Prerequisite: Come down with a potentially life-threatening disease.
Description: Helps you fight off nasty microorganisms. Sadly, you won’t get EXP from them.

Name: Platelet Party (LV 1)
Prerequisite: Vitality 30, receive Bleeding (Moderate) on at least five different occasions.
Description: Your external and internal bleeding will fix itself slightly faster. The sources of the bleeding (such as a cut or a wound) will heal at the same rate as before.

Name: Vitamin D(efense) (LV 3)
Prerequisite: Vitality 40, break bones on at least eleven difference occasions.
Description: Your bones are slightly more durable and will heal slightly faster.

Name: Deep Breathing (LV 2)
Prerequisite: Endurance 20, breathe heavily numerous times in a one-week period
Description: Air is life. Every deep breath or two normal breaths you take restores 1.5 Stamina.

Name: Swordsmanship (LV 5)
Prerequisite: Dexterity 30, spend at least one week wielding a sword, and defeat at least one worthwhile opponent while using a sword.
Description: Become more proficient with sharp-edged, bladed weapons with the shape and weight of a sword.

Name: Fleet of Foot (LV 2)
Prerequisite: 20 Endurance, 20 Dexterity, spend a moderate amount of time running for an extended period.
Description: Adds 4 functional Dexterity to your running speed when running for longer than 30 seconds.

Name: Foraging (LV 1)
Prerequisite: Perception 10, spend at least several hours hunting for food and water in the wilderness.
Description: Gain an instinctive sense for where food and water are located when out in the wilderness.

Name: Hunting (LV 2)
Prerequisite: Perception 10, spend at least several hours hunting animals in the wilderness, and successfully hunt at least one worthwhile creature.
Description: Gain an instinctive sense for where fresh game is located when out in the wilderness.

Name: Speed Reading (LV 2)
Prerequisites: Mind 15, read at least 10 books
Description: Your personal reading speed is increased by 20% without a reduction in memory retention or comprehension.

Name: Diplomacy (LV 3)
Prerequisite: Mind 40, defuse numerous tense situations using words and body language.
Description: Become more proficient in the art of negotiation. With your personality, this may be the Skill you needed most.

Name: Arachnophobia (LV 2) (RARE)
Prerequisite: Kill at least 50 worthwhile insects, and experience a moment of intense loathing towards spiders.
Description: You hate all creepy crawlies, but you hate spiders the most. Deal 50% extra damage to insects and an additional 250% extra damage against spiders.

Name: Mathematics (LV 4)
Prerequisite: 40 Mind, successfully solve at least 200 worthwhile math problems.
Description: You know your times tables and everything. Your speed at solving math problems is slightly increased.

Name: Leadership (LV 1)
Prerequisite: Mind 25, exhibit strong leadership in at least one tense situation.
Description: Slightly strengthens your ability to exhibit strong leadership and inspire people.

Name: Melancholy Resistance (LV2) (RARE) (Deactivated)
Prerequisite: Experience a deep-seated, soul-crushing sadness. Twice.
Description: Allows you to get back on your feet more quickly.

???
Prerequisites: Reach Level 99, ???