The 3-Date Rule | The Horny Post | 2/26/24 (Patreon)
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Yesterday, we discussed what kind of dates I like. Today we will discuss a personal boundary on the subject of dating. Gay men and boys have historically fucked before hello. Not bound by heteronormative values and the caution of women, gay men get right down to business. If they even get to the date they're fucking by the end of the night. After all, why not? Men are more overtly expressive of their sexuality than women. When horn-dog men date each other fucking is a natural progression of events. And I was the same for years.
I lost my virginity on July 27th, 2019. 11 days after my 18th birthday. The day after I turned 18 I got on Grindr and made a profile. And very soon, a man I will keep the identity safe of messaged me "Hey." Well, I just fell head over heels! That was the joke one of his mothers made when I later met her only 2 weeks after meeting him. (We shall call him Alejandro as a pseudonym. ) Meeting his parents so soon is indicative of what Alejandro and I's relationship was like. Fast. Straight to the point. When I met him in person on the mid-summer day I didn't know I would be having my cherry popped only a few hours later. He was very gentle. If not very exciting. He had written me a love note while we were getting to know each other on Grindr and showed to me at his house later into the date. And I felt that since he felt he loved me, I might as well give my virginity to him. It was all so awkward. But that's a story for another day. The point of this excerpt of my life is to show how fast I would get in bed with the men I was with.
Our relationship ended 8 months later and I was hooking with men soon after. But it would be 2 years until I would have a boyfriend again. And funny enough, his name is the same as one of y'all Patrons here by coincidence. I won't divulge who, so let's call him Cane. My story with Cane is insane and involved another person in a polycule, but let's forget that for a second. The day I got with... no, the hour I got with him we were having sex. And it was God awful. Some of the worst weirdest sex you could imagine. And after 3 weeks, he left me. But from then was when I made a decision.
No sex until 3 dates. I decided 23 months ago that I would not have sex with a partner until at least having seen them 3 times as a couple. My experience has taught me that people will use you. I may be a submissive slut who likes to be "used," but I don't want to be... used. Used for all my worth and thrown away. Used in the sense that I mean nothing to a man after he's been inside of me. I don't want 1st date sex anymore and I won't ever again. If I am to date someone know I won't give out until 3 dates. This is to increase the likelihood that he really wants to get to know me and not just leave his cummies inside. As much as I like cummies, I want... no need something real. No matter how well intentioned I won't have sex with a partner until that 3rd date. It is my hope that any future man or woman I'm with accepts that. I may be a "sexy object," but I'm not a sex object.