Bit of reflection + meeting RL friends after many years (Pixiv Fanbox)

When you're an introverted hermit like myself, you tend to want to be alone all the time. Even if you have friends, you might not want to see them. Nothing personal. That ended up being my life going on almost 10 years. I have two best friends in life - both met when I was 11 years old. In 8 years I've seen one twice (both this year) and the other four times (2015, 2017, twice this year with the other friend). To see them after many years (once in February, and another today) means that despite my apparent happiness being by myself, I lost all that time I could have been a part of their lives. Learning that one got married, the other is moving to another state, both have successful careers while I'm starting mine late. It's time I'll never get back. We're all still cool with each other. That hasn't changed. You know your close friends when you are able to easily connect like that as if it were nothing. And that's saying a lot because in many ways we're different people: racially, in our believes, politics, habits, interests, etc. Neither of them know the extent of this hobby of mine beyond the "it's 3D and it mostly involves adult stuff / porn". I like keeping it that way. I've been doing 3D stuff for 7 years. Long ass time that flew by. And it hasn't all been pretty. Compared to certain artists, I started rather late and I've already passed the big 30. I do have aspirations in life that aren't just 3D that I've put off. I hope that I'll continue to work on what I can while balancing my time to live a life that's a little more fulfilling. Now, I better start working on something so I don't lose my mojo again.