My Confession (Pixiv Fanbox)

Hi everyone, ShizumiHanako here.

Let's sit down, have a coffee, and allow me to tell my story.

If you are busy, you can leave, it's fine~

1. A bit about my personal life.

I was set to be a normal person when I was born, grown up, have a normal student life from elementary to secondary.

My bad side was I can't communicate or having socialize skill, so I don't have any friends at all. And I sat at the very end desk in class.

One time, I even hang out with bad friend (skipped class and went to the Internet Cafe for video games), but I'm glad I stopped in time.

I always wonder.. what will I be in future? Will it bright? Or will it dark?

Time flied as I was thinking, I already set foot in high school.

Still, I got no friends at all, due to my lack communication skills. And that was when I came to anime.

My first anime that The High School of Deads, which was on Youtube. Later, I search to watch more, and have many emotions by watching Angel Beats, Clannad, Konosuba,..

My time in high school, I thought it would be enjoyable with this, and then..

As long as I close to college, that question came up again, "What will my future look like?" I put the phone down, and start to study hard.

I finally got into some promising colleges but.. I chose the wrong decision.

"Hey! My son just got a full scholarship in Mechanic University in Australia! What about you?"

"My daughter married at age 18, she was good at business and open a big company in United States!"

Then, my parents put me in the university that I never wanted, but.. I wanted to be success, to be like others, to make my parents proud.. And it watse a year of mine.

I moved to another University, start over again, but I lost hope to everything.

One day, I get to know to Custom Maid 3D2, and got my first ever story post, yes, it was "Yuri's Spirit".

This is me when I saw my first story gained a lot of likes from everyone on Pixiv, from then, my life open a new path.

I started Koikatsu and Honey Select, good and bad stories, and every time, I always checked the comments to see how everyone feels about the stories.

Nothing is last long, so I came to drawing in 2021, and things not going very easy from there.

Why everyone stay away from me? Not because I was lack of communication skills, it because I was compared by my parents a lot, and inside me, form a new personality called insecure.

I always get mad of myself if I couldn't do anything that others can do it easily.

Despite many skilled artists offer help to me, I just went mad sometimes, pushed them away.. I didn't respect them..

When come to realize, my drawing just stand still in one place and no one is going to help me anymore.

It was because of me, all because of me. I blamed myself.

If any artists who did help me before, see this, I wanted to apologise for disrespecting you..

And later that, I tried to hold back my insecure, doing my best, learn from others and made some progress that I can proud of.

That was all about my life, it's a nice coffee with you also.

I'm glad you could read to the end.

Finally, some question that I would love to answer on Fanbox.

2. What are the works that I most proud of?

- I must say.. all of it. As long as everyone and my fans enjoy it.

3. How did you come to start creating stuff?

- I was admired by other creators and artists. By learning and developing through time, I can do many stories.

4. A happy memorable event in my life as a creator?

- Enjoying every moment as my stories getting many loves from the fans and everyone.

5. Is there something I wanted to try on Fanbox?

- If Fanbox has an app, and an pop up notification for everyone to easy see when their favorite creators or artists made a post.

6. And finally, my message to all of my fans who are reading this and in future.

My honest and deppest thank you everyone, for being my hope, for brighting my future every day!

Thank you the creators of character cards that I used to my stories. You are a huge part of it!

And BR-chan, thank you for keeping the Koikatsu and Honey Select updated along with all the modders!

I'm glad that everyone can stay with me this long, and I was bad at writing confession so.. please forgive me about that.

This is the end of the post. It's a long story^^

Thank you everyone for your support! And please stay tuned for more stories~

And also, please let me know your thoughts and confession in the comment~