MANDATORY BRIEFS! (Patreon)

A couple weekends ago, my Guard unit had.... the Annual MANDATORY BRIEFS! That means our yearly finger-wagging lectures about all kinds of stuff. We get annual briefings on Fraternization, changes to uniform wear, updates on personnel policies, sexual harassment, personal soldier safety, and so forth. Enjoy my "notes" as a Happy Generic Winter Holiday/Merry Christmas/Cheerful HannuKwanzSolsticeMas to all!

The Three Ghosts of Christmas, except this time they are Ghosts of Deployments Past, Present, and Future! Sweet Dreams, Private Cratchett.

We get briefings about what to do in the event of an "Active Shooter" on a base. No joke; you'd think a base would be super secure but it has happened a couple of times, a couple of Army bases and a Navy yard. But it also got me thinking, "what would an INactive shooter look like?"

The best thing to do is always to bear in mind the Army mantra "stay alert = stay alive". This applies to all sorts of things, but to me it also seems to indicate the Army's intention that I consume *lots* of coffee. I'm 100% on board with that.

One thing we're always told to apply is "general countermeasures" (a laundry list of things to do to keep a place secure, ie, lock doors, etc). I had to wonder, who was General Countermeasures? Was he a bold man? Did he win medals? Did he have a kick-ass recipe for chicken? I then thought about a new and more accurate insignia for Sergeant-Major, with the tiny little scowly-face inside the stripes. 

Pretty obvious to assume that we were at the "sexual harassment" phase of the brief by this time. Something about "don't be that guy" and how word gets around, etc. 

Really, most military briefs of this sort boil down to "Don't screw stuff up". 

I think I saw a PowerPoint slide with a misspelling on it... or something. Anyhow, I deployed the Grammar Nazi, but he was ineffective. 

Any infractions can be met with harsh military discipline. 

That's all for now, I will load more in a few days! Take care and have a great Holiday Season!