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720. Tales from the Pit: Bringing a Child into the World (Feat. Abe Epperson) (Patreon)

Published:
2024-05-10 13:00:12
Imported:
2024-06
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Content

Michael asks Abe Epperson, fellow Small Bean, to discuss his thoughts about starting a family. They discuss regret, happiness, and the anxiety of bringing a human into the world. Abe’s pretty satisfied with not having kids, but it’s always been on Michael’s list of life goals. Let’s see how these friends navigate the conversation from two different perspectives.

Buy Michael’s book: https://www.patreon.com/smallbeans/shop

Features:

Abe Epperson: https://twitter.com/abethemighty 

Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP


Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691

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Comments

Arran Bouten

Thanks for sharing this conversation. I'm a new father of a 9 month old boy. My wife wanted kids 'in her bones' and it took me a long time to come round to it. So much of what you discussed was like a replay my own thoughts grappling with the decision. On connecting with kids, I felt very little for babies and kids before having my own, even my own nieces. With my own son, it was worrying over the first few months when I didn’t feel much of a connection. But that grew slowly and now having spent so much time with him, I've gotten to know his behaviour, his young personality and his quirks. I get him in a way I don't get any other kids and now feel so attached to him. It still gets boring and I still get frustrated but there is a bond there now that makes those challenging moments and thoughts easier to manage. Above all though having a child has strengthened my marriage. Not only through the rewarding shared effort that we've put in so far but getting to know our son together is like sharing a beautiful in-joke. No one else gets him in that way that we do. A noise or face from him prompts my wife and I to share a look or a laugh that has so much love in it between the two of us. My feeling is that parenthood can swing on the quality of your relationship with your co-parent. If it's good, you'll get so much joy and fulfillment out of the life changing hard work parenting brings. If it’s bad, it would be really bad for all involved. Which in a lot of ways makes me think being a single parent would be better than co-parenting in a bad relationship.

Jeff B

I never thought I would have a kid when I was young. Since having my son I’ve realized that I never truly loved anything or anyone before. The instant your child is born you have a million little realizations about your own life and things just seem to make a little bit more sense all of a sudden. It’s hard to explain but in my opinion it’s the single most fulfilling thing a human being can do and I highly recommend