The Gamer Chapter 1417 – Thorough Grinding 9 – Gunk Removal (Patreon)

John stretched, wonderfully refreshed, and immediately sought out Delicia for a good morning brat breaking. After playing the submissive for Siena and Rave, his dom instincts had come back with a vengeance and demanded to be gratified.

Half an hour later, he left a giggling, quivering mess in the corner of the bathroom. Delicia had awaited him in the bath, as the maid in charge of cleaning him should, and been turned from service to dumb-fucked mess with the appropriate amount of care. After that, he was ready for his breakfast.

Day 6 of the grinding, all in all, began with the usual. Soon enough, they were back in the Raid. There were fewer haremettes following the action today. There was housework to be done, bureaucracy to wrestle, and his double to help with the next Golemcrafter Challenge. Personally, John split his bodies between the Raid, the watch party, and the Class Challenge. He also opted to have the Ambassador Double be his active body today. Aerial manoeuvrability may be limited, but it did still exist and would be useful for kiting the slimes around.

It took them the entire day to clear out the segment of the dungeon. John got another level out of that, which was a worthwhile payoff in and of itself, taking him to level 563. An hour into Day 7, they finally did spot the boss. It was something that John had encountered before, albeit not in the confines of his abilities.

Half-melted knights, perhaps the squires or the regiment under the head knight, were joined in a massive blob. Shields raised high and wielding spears, they resembled both a typical roman phalanx and the aptly named boss from the classic game Demon’s Souls. The primary differences here were the degree to which the blobs remained identifiable as humanoids and the various noxious colours they embodied.


‘Even the name is recycled… well, no reason not to steal a good idea, I guess,’ John thought and analysed the arena. It was a crater, for the lack of a better term. It appeared that the initial explosion had destroyed the houses here and the poison had then eaten through the rubble, leaving only a couple of walls standing. What once must have been a garrison of some description was now only dirt and scattered rock. Any ooze puddles that had existed must have been absorbed into the boss itself, which was in the hollowed-out frame of the keep.

“I foresee… a repetition of your path here… sludge creeping down the many paths. It runs slowly, then accelerates, as it turns from many into a purple stream, alone. What preceded it dies, one after the other.”

“Alright, so the first phase will be the many outer layers of the sludge coming off and in the second phase it’s on its own and moves faster, is my guess,” John translated. “Pretty straightforward. Straightforward doesn’t equal easy though.” He looked over his kiting focused composition. It was himself, Sylph, Siena, Salamander, Undine, Aclysia, Beatrice, Momo, Rave and Nia. “We’ll remain with this party, for now.”

They charged towards the boss without further delay. There was a grace distance between the edge of the arena and the core. Halfway down the distance, the Phalanx Sludge activated. A volley of spears were ejected from its body at high speed. Beatrice, Rave, Sylph and Siena barely managed to dodge. The rest were hit by one or two of the spears, immediately applying their poison at one stack and dealing considerable damage from the impact.

New spears were forming within the Phalanx Sludge, slowly emerging between the many shields. Rather than wait for their regeneration, the boss turned its lumbering body and pointed another side at them.

Rave and Beatrice were at the boss before the second volley was fired. Several sludges separated from the main boss, oozing towards the duo as something that most closely resembled a slug centaur. They towered over the humanoid combatants, putting to scale how large they were and how truly massive the Phalanx Sludge was. Several rows of spears aimed at several combatants.

The spears were difficult to avoid at range and practically impossible up close while being jabbed at by the shield carrying fragments of the Phalanx. John could only watch as the volley of crystallized poison punctured both Rave and Beatrice. Gruesomely the spears stuck out of their backs. The wounds were real, everything about the pain of a Raid encounter was real.

There was something quite wrong with John’s girlfriend that she seemed to take that as a challenge.

With a deliberate punch, she snapped the spear in half and tore it out of her body. Blood spattered onto the ground, then ceased. The pink of her bodysuit covered the wound and began to stitch the feline Lightbearer back together. Grinning, she dove under another attack. The Phalanx Sludge itself ever so slowly backed away from the fighting, while turning and aligning its next volley of spear attacks.

The display of willpower from his girlfriend was admirable, but the attempt was practically doomed already. John had lost too much mana to be comfortable, everyone else too much health. Fateweaving would teleport them out before a lethal wound and they were inching quite close to it. Still, they pushed on further, to learn all they could.

The vital lesson from the first pull was the obvious one. Beatrice followed the tracking of the spears on her. It never left her, not even when line of sight was broken, and that was the most important detail. During the third volley, several of the people hid behind the walls. Like typical Raid assets, the rock was sturdier than their superhuman bodies. The crystal lances broke upon the rock, without causing any harm.

Knowing what they had to do and executing it with the necessary precision were two different affairs. The volley mechanic was not their only concern. More and more of the Phalanx Sludge drifted from its core, revealing a sickly pulsing centre. Each separated piece was a tall obstacle and a spear that thrust repeatedly at melee combatants. They formed ranks, partly melding with each other, and where one’s attacks were easily avoided, a semi-circle of five did not make it so simple. A situation that all too readily occurred while hiding behind the limited walls.

Attempts 1-20 were spent on brute force learning how to best kite the sludges and deal with the volleys. Two so simple mechanics could make for a wicked puzzle and it took a detailed understanding of the movement speed of the sludges and the intervals of the volleys to truly get the timings right. They wanted to steadily keep moving, deal damage to the separated sludges, and avoid the spears all at the same time.

Although individual movements were the crux of the operation, no Raid was ever completed without a central strategy. They eventually worked out that they could maximize the time between spear volleys by staying near to each other. They separated the battlefield into four segments. All were supposed to be within one quarter at the same time. That created enough space to keep the kiting going without interfering with each other.

Attempt 27 was when they figured out that a certain rhythm further delayed the volleys. The way the boss determined when to fire was the amount of ready spears it had pointing in the direction populated by its enemies. It appeared it required 1,5 spears per target, rounding up, and it preferred turning to waiting for the spears to regrow. By alternating clockwise and counterclockwise after each rotation, they broke the momentum of the boss.

The better they got, the further in they went, and thus another mechanic became a hindrance: the Phalanx Sludge itself moving. The pace at which it did so was crawling and still it eventually reached points in the arena that forced them to rethink their entire hiding pattern. With that realization came the need to control the boss’ movement. The primary factor of how it moved seemed to be away from the closest threat or largest cluster of party members.

They had been largely ignoring the boss, prioritizing the separated parts instead, so the latter had been active most of the time. With the many minute differences in the execution of their strategies on each attempt, the motions of the boss were also different. Someone was required to take the front line and coax the boss into whatever direction suited them best. Aclysia was the obvious choice for that. Utilizing her Glacial Exoskeleton and Fortification, she could cope with 1 or 2 spears hitting her just well enough that her HP regeneration could make up for a fair share of the damage she sustained between volleys. It was a solution with a limited scope and minorly RNG reliant, but it worked.

With all of these pieces moving, by attempt 33, they had the general strategy down. Aclysia engaged the main boss, Rave, Beatrice, and Siena grabbed the attention of the various oozes that pearled off the Phalanx Sludge, while Sylph, Salamander, John and Nia dealt damage. Momo and Undine provided their usual support.

With the basics of the fight figured out, they made rapid progress. The nature of the fight meant that it was the hardest at the start, when the Phalanx Sludge had all spears ready and the maximum number of oozes to separate from its main self. Attempt 40 was when they finally hit the second phase.

The last of the oozes flowed off the Phalanx Sludge. All of it was purple now, a giant, glistening heap of amorphous poison that rose up into a trypophobia-inducing, hole-riddled sphere. Baleful light purple light shone from the gaps, pulsing with a terrible heartbeat. Soon it intensified, causing the nearby ground to ripple, like sand vibrating from soundwaves.

Tentacles shot out of the surfaces, immediately grabbing Aclysia and slamming her into the ground. The maid breathed a glacial wind upon the limbs. They snapped when the boss attempted to lift her again. The stumps regenerated in a second. The Black Ice that had been steadily growing where Aclysia had hurt the Raid Boss was ejected in an instant. At supersonic speeds, the tendrils whipped around, slamming into Aclysia’s abdomen just as she was back on her feet. She was catapulted into one of the unbreakable walls, her HP dropping dangerously low.

“Ignore the remaining sludges!” John shouted. “All focus on the boss!”

Everyone followed his command, leaving behind them the various parts of the Phalanx Sludge that remained slow and easily kited. Should they coalesce at the centre of the battlefield, they would become a menace. To end this before that happened, that was the obvious goal.

Sylph was the first to arrive as reinforcement, skipping along the ground like a stone hurled by Zeus himself. The scream of magical lightning followed in her wake, then pulled in front of her. The combined power of her acceleration and magic slammed into the boss, turning the heap into a C-shape.

It did not last long. The boss recovered near instantaneously, collapsing on top of Sylph. She skipped to the side, but the tendrils were faster than even she was. They wrapped around her and crushed the life out of her, activating the Fateweaving before her corporeal form could be extinguished entirely.

Salamander’s meteorites showered down on the boss moments later. Each chunk of rock was extinguished by the noxious body of the purple entity. Its body concaved under the impact, then launched the rocks back into the environment as scattershot.

Barely, Siena and Nia sidestepped. One escaped the attention of the tentacles by turning invisible, suppressing her entire presence, the other teleported forwards. Nia’s black instrument of undoing took the shape of a primitive wedge. She appeared atop the core of the creature and drove the weapon deep into the surface. A high-pitched screech, like gas hissing through a damaged flute, filled the arena.

A tendril swatted Nia away, only for Siena to take her place. Her body was drenched in the energy of her origin, turned shaded and translucent, dark as the blackest night and luminescent with constellations. Unleashed, she clawed into the rift created. The boss’ main attention was immediately diverted away from finishing off Nia to Siena.

Aclysia Aided her ally, moving across the battlefield at increased speeds. One flank was secured by the wall that was her icy body. On the other, a torrent of black water occupied the tendrils. A flood of malicious intent and maws wrestled the ooze. Undine was the weaker of the two amorphous entities, her size steadily ripped away by the lashes of the Phalanx Sludge. Time was limited.

Between the two protectors was the core. A visible tear had been created in its midst, a part where the light within escaped to the outside as a constant, almost liquid fog. A deep tremble went through the Phalanx Sludge, throwing Siena off.

John took the opportunity. From his raised position in the air, he loosened several Arc Lances. They were surrounded by a black sheen, the mark of Momo’s buffs. Several fireflies followed in their wake, scattering out to all those that were partaking in the final push.

And through the roaring sounds of the battle, they could all hear the words.

“A solemn reign, for the few that rise up high…” Rave dropped to all fours, then raised her left hand. The hard light claws intensified in their techno-coloured light. “…and we all fight…” They lengthened, shrunk, lengthened again, the magic swelling within too unstable to be contained for long. “…let our worlds collide!”

Rave stormed forwards, glassing the ground in her wake. The intense heat forced everyone aside. Even with John’s magical sight, it was difficult to not be blinded by the prismatic radiance. Rave was a streak of red, green, and blue, her hair a blur of gold. She leapt, landed atop the boss, and rammed her claw into the gash.

The heat suddenly disappeared. The light suddenly disappeared. The colours suddenly disappeared. It was as if someone had swallowed the sun. Nothing moved, not even the remaining oozes. Elbow deep in the boss, Rave remained, a grim smile on her face.

Steam rose from the surface of the Phalanx Sludge. Its surface boiled, all of it boiled. The disappeared light made it swell from within. The intense purple soon was turned into a thin pink filter around the energy that was bottled up inside. Everyone backed off, even Rave herself jumped and hid behind one of the walls.

The resilient purple sludge turned hard. Light broke through swiftly forming cracks. Then the entire creature exploded into a mushroom shaped aurora borealis.

John landed next to his girlfriend and gave her a victory kiss.


‘Level 564,’ John thought.

“How come Sylph always dies during these things?” Salamander asked, while everyone coalesced where the boss had just been. The remaining sludges had despawned and relaxation settled in.

“Ya already know why,” Rave responded. “Even I remember, so come on, Red.”

“Yeah, yeah, fate of the glass cannon, but Siena manages to make it out!”

“That would be due to my caution and grace – I know how to balance the edge.”

“Do I have to remind you of the several times you got discovered doing something because you just HAD to fuck around and find out?” Salamander asked loudly.

“And yet I never died,” Siena purred. “I only die the little deaths – Oh, I do enjoy those.”

“La petite mort,” Nia stated. The pariah was dangerously see-through and held her side. John and Undine alleviated both issues by showering her with attention and healing energy. Then they got to the loot.

Common loot was uninteresting, more jars of the same. Uncommon was similar, although John did get the Sludgeling. As per usual, he had the choice to keep it or add it to the Menagerie. He opted for the latter. He neither felt like raising it himself nor entrusting it to someone else, especially since it wasn’t that impressive.

The Shield and Spear of the Phalanx, in the rare category, were another set of items that firmly fell in the ‘keep for Fusion’s elite fighter’s’ category. They weren’t good enough for John’s harem to use and they were too powerful to just throw on the general market space. For the last two items John got, they would never see the light of day.

One was the Phalanx Core, which allowed him to raise the core of Phalanx Sludge. The problem? Much like the conceptual Raid boss, the core required sapient beings to be melted into it. The Phalanx Binding, a legendary item, was the extension of this, allowing people to turn themselves into the oozes that had been joined with the purple core. While the Phalanx Core could only be used once, the Phalanx Binding could be used for as long as there were sacrifices.

Thirty minutes later, John was staring at the two spherical, almost unassuming objects on the dinner table. He wasn’t alone in that. Lydia, Momo and Scarlett were also there. Aclysia and Claire stood behind him. Metra leaned against a nearby wall.

The question posed by those two items was a simple binary. “Do I destroy them or keep them?” the Gamer asked. A third option came to mind and he glanced over to Lydia. “Or do you want them?” He made sure that the question was exactly that: a question, not a binary.

“The same difficulty that makes these items lay before us makes it impossible for me to answer that question with certainty.” Lydia picked up the Phalanx Binding, a swirling orb the size of a handball. “Their use is fundamentally gruesome, so I do not wish to own them on a basic level. However, as a ruler, to assure one’s nation has access to the greatest of deterrents is a duty. This Phalanx Sludge entity, Observe says it would be level 500, correct?”

“10 levels per bound Phalanx Sludge, up to a maximum of 500. Additional Phalanx Sludges can be created and will immediately bind with it if another one dies, provided they are in range. Levels drain after one week, if there’s no replacements. The sludges are twice the level of the ‘material’ up to a maximum of level 200,” John summarized the attributes of the item.

Like Lydia he was deciding if he wanted to have this. It was a way to take otherwise basic foot soldiers and make them part of a terribly efficient defensive unit. It also killed them in the process, leaving only a slime with a hint of their mind. Cruel was not the right word for the treatment, as it would not be a painful existence. It was, however, disgusting to John’s human sensibilities. Like keeping a brain dead coma patient alive for surgery practice.

The other haremettes around the table were ready to weigh in on one side or another. No debate ever started. John could already foresee what they would tell him. Momo would advise he deleted the items. Scarlett would say it was best to keep such a tool around. Metra may even recommend to try and find people for it as soon as possible. Knowing the First of Wrath, she had more than one tale to tell about soldiers that had forsaken their individuality to protect their home.

“Claire?” Lydia put the sphere back on the table. “What do you make of this?”

“I do not disagree with giving people the option to change themselves… but to take from them the capacity to think itself disgusts me,” the vampire maid responded, a growl under her voice. “I think they should be destroyed.”

Slowly, Lydia nodded and nudged them over to John.

And so that loot was discarded.