The Queens of Remnant - Chapter 16 (Patreon)

Something Sun said hadn’t sat well with Yang, but she couldn’t figure out what it was until she tried to fall asleep.  Then she hardly slept while mulling over his words.

She didn’t know what life was like in the Badlands, a fact that increased her guilt every time she thought about it.  Vale had contributed to the region’s destruction, and Vale would contribute to its restoration, yet she had no idea what it was like now.

Admittedly, she had never known much about the Badlands.  Not as much as she should, at least.  The collection of settlements had made it onto her schedule only a handful of times per year, usually to negotiate prices with one of the larger farms supplying produce to Vale or to visit a girl she fancied at the time.

The quaint, slow-paced land disappeared faster than anyone could have imagined.  Order evaporated seemingly overnight.  Laws became meaningless and unenforced.  Worst of all, the armies on both sides treated the small towns and farms like a horrible, war-torn playground.

She was advised not to visit, so her last appearance occurred near the beginning of the war.  Even though that village had been far from the fighting, fear and worry abounded.  The residents hardly wanted to stop and talk; they wanted to finish their work and return to their families as soon as possible.

Yang never returned.  Out of necessity with her increased demands at the palace, out of self-preservation due to the Phage ravaging her normally excellent command of her spark, and out of remorse.  Walking around Vale was enough of a reminder of what the war had done to her own people…seeing the damage done to a once quaint and prosperous community would tear even more at her heart.

But avoidance was a poor excuse for ignorance.  If Vale was going to help the Badlands, she needed a better understanding of what was happening there.  She needed to see the scope of the damage so that she understood exactly why Blake was so angry and determined to make things better.  Ruby usually acted as Yang’s eyes and ears in cases like this - she traveled the city and outskirts far more than Yang, especially as of late, and brought back insights into where they went wrong or what they could do better.  With Ruby in Atlas, Yang had to take care of this herself.

Waiting at the foot of the palace steps, soaking in the warm Vale sun, she would admit that she was a little excited.  Even if the destination was guaranteed to make her feel awful, it had been so long since she left Vale that she embraced the change of pace.  The only variable she couldn’t rely on was her spark.

After a moderately scorching morning, her inner fire had settled into a dull roar that hopefully wouldn’t swell into more.  Other than that, everything was ready.  An escort of Elites.  A comfortable yet still nice outfit.  A wagon of supplies that would serve as an olive branch.  They were only waiting on the last piece of the puzzle - a guide.  Thankfully, Yang knew just the person, and she was hurrying down the steps right now.

Seeing Blake sent a tingle of thrill down Yang’s spine, same as it did every day they’d known each other so far.  It was almost as if in the few hours they spent apart Yang forgot how poised, dignified, and effortlessly beautiful the Resistance leader was.

As great as Blake had looked in her borrowed clothing, today’s outfit suited her much better.  Plain, comfortable, functional...nothing suggested she was dainty or incapable.  On the contrary, she looked prepared to handle whatever life threw her way, and Yang had no doubt that she was skilled enough to do so.

“What’s going on?” Blake asked as soon as she made it to the lower level of the palace.  Her gaze swept over the group of Elites before taking in Yang’s outfit, her curiosity growing.

“Going on a little excursion today.”

“Excursion?  Where are you going?”

“You mean where are we going.”  When Yang gestured between them, Blake’s brow knit further together.  “And we’re going to The Badlands.”

Yang expected excitement - happiness, even.  Instead, Blake looked at a loss for words.  Confusion and disbelief swirled in her eyes, and then she shook her head.

“What do you mean ‘we’re going to the Badlands?’” she asked, so Yang smiled while pulling a cloak around her shoulders.

“I don’t know what it’s like there.  I can listen to your stories, but I’ll understand even better if I experience it firsthand.  So I’d like to go, and I’m hoping you’ll come with me.”

With the invitation extended, Yang stood back and waited for a response.  Blake’s knowledge would make the day considerably easier, yet she coveted Blake’s company most.  By going together, she would have an expert leading the way, Blake could visit home, and...she could learn more about Blake’s home.

When Blake’s response was to stare in slack-jawed surprise, however, Yang realized that she shouldn’t assume Blake wanted to travel anywhere together.  And she wouldn’t force Blake to agree to anything.

“If you don’t want to, that’s fine,” she added so that Blake understood the choice was entirely hers.  “I just thought it’d be easier to go with someone familiar with the landscape.  Please don’t feel obligated.”

Those must have been the magic words because Blake finally snapped out of her shock.

“That’s not a good idea.”

“Why not?  Don’t think I can handle it?”

Yang might be weaker than normal, but she could still level a building if she had to.  Hopefully, she didn’t have to, but if the situation called for it…

“Because it’s dangerous,” Blake replied.  “And you won’t exactly be welcomed with open arms.  I wouldn’t be surprised if someone tried to kill you.”

After tapping the hilt of the short blade hanging by her side, which was only her secondary means of protection, Yang headed toward the carriage meant for her.

“Are you saying we need reinforcements?” she asked while Blake followed.  “Because I can ask Cecelia...”

“No.  I’m saying you can’t go there as yourself.”

Before Yang reached the carriage, Blake stepped in front of her.

“Ok.”  Not even moderately annoyed that Blake just blocked her path, Yang stepped back and smiled.  “How am I supposed to not be myself?”

After opening her mouth, Blake sighed and shook her head.  She obviously wasn’t thrilled about the idea, which made Yang feel guilty for bringing it up.  From their conversation yesterday, she thought that Blake wanted to visit home, but...apparently, she had misinterpreted Blake’s words.

“You don’t have to come,” she reiterated, trying to make it clear that there were no hidden obligations.  “You’re welcome to stay here.  Maybe you can finish that book you just started?”

A good book seemed to be the only distraction Blake indulged in, but her eyes didn’t light up at the thought of reading like they normally did.  Instead, she frowned while studying the men and women prepared to escort them outside the city walls.  Their armor, their weapons, the horses and carriages - nothing escaped her thorough inspection.

“I’ll go,” she finally said, meeting Yang’s gaze with her intense amber eyes.  “But it can only be the two of us.”

“Don’t let Cecelia hear you say that,” Yang joked.  “She’ll get jealous.”

“I’m serious, Yang.”  Subtly frowning, Blake folded her arms over her chest.  “This won’t be like walking through Vale.  The Badlands has its reputation for a reason - it’s not safe there, especially not for someone like you.”

Yang flinched at the words but dropped any attempt at humor.  She wanted Blake to accompany her, and she would take Blake’s advice over any of the advisors Vale had.

“Ok,” she agreed.  “Just you and me.  We can take my personal firebeasts.”

Blake looked shocked by Yang’s acceptance but even more surprised when Yang walked over to the two giant monsters at the front of her carriage.  “You can take Celica,” Yang added, nodding to the rightmost creature before scratching underneath the chin of the one closest to her.  “Ember’s not a big fan of strangers, are you Ember?”

A low, pleased huff rumbled through Ember’s chest as smoke unfurled through sharp white teeth.  Celica swung her head over and bumped into Ember’s, subtly jockeying for position as Yang reached into the saddle bag on Ember’s side and pulled out two pieces of charred firewood.  Ember snapped at Celica as soon as she saw the treat, earning herself an unhappy burst of flame in return.

“Easy girls,” Yang cooed while passing one piece to each of them.  While they happily munched on their treats, sending splinters and pieces of ash to the ground, she noticed Blake staring at the two creatures with an unreadable expression.  “Ever ridden a firebeast before?” she asked, and Blake finally blinked out of that trance.

“No,” she answered simply.  “And we’re not taking them.”

“But -” Yang started to protest, spinning around as Blake strode over to one of the cargo vehicles and opened several compartments.

“We’ll need some basic supplies,” Blake added before nodding at what she found inside.  “Do you have a bag we can use?”

By the time Yang looked around, one of the guards had stepped forward and offered Blake a travel bag.

“Perfect.  Thank you.”

After accepting the bag with a quick smile, Blake set it on the ground and began filling it with various items.  Food, bandages, water...she seemed to know exactly what she needed, so Yang didn’t question her.  Once the bag was packed and slung around her shoulders, she frowned at Yang - more specifically, at Yang’s outfit.

“What is it?” Yang asked, but Blake paid the question no mind.  Instead, she strode over, that slight frown still in place, and pulled the blade from Yang’s waist. The metallic ringing sound of it leaving the scabbard sent a trickle of surprise through Yang’s veins, but she didn’t move.  With anyone else, she would - and probably should - respond to the action as a possible threat.  With Blake, fear was nowhere to be found.

So she made no attempt to defend herself when Blake stepped closer, blade clutched expertly in one hand, and grabbed the front of her shirt.  In her peripheral vision, she noticed the guards edging closer while, in one effortless motion, Blake sheared off one of the golden tassels and dropped it on the ground.  The others swiftly followed, with the elegant embroidery close behind.  She made quick work of the once-regal shirt, reducing it to something plain and simple before picking up a lock of Yang’s hair.

Just as quickly as Blake started, she froze.  With her fingers curled in Yang’s hair, the disbelief in her eyes reflected what Yang felt in her heart.

Blake had been about to cut her hair, and she was going to let it happen.

Now, they stared at each other, neither of them knowing what to say or do, both probably wondering why Yang hadn’t pulled away.  Why had she just stood there, willingly submitting to whatever Blake deemed best?

She trusted Blake.  That was the only answer.  What hadn’t been obvious until this moment, however, was just how strong that trust was.

They called Blake an assassin.  They claimed she had taken lives, yet when she held a blade near Yang’s throat...Yang wasn’t afraid.  What she felt was different.  Respect.  Fondness, even.  And those feelings grew when Blake tenderly tucked her hair behind her ear and pulled up the hood on her cloak.

“You can’t go looking like that...” Blake explained softly.  “We’ll be attacked on sight.”

“Got it,” Yang whispered in return.

When Blake nodded and turned away, Yang struggled to comprehend what just happened.  Because something just happened.  Unfortunately, now wasn’t the time to sort through those feelings.  Regaining her business-like attitude, Blake walked over to one of the rear carriages and set her hand on one of the horses tethered to it.

“I’m assuming you know how to ride,” she said, looking the horse in the eyes and touching its cheek before moving to the next.

“Of course.  But -”

“How many firebeasts have you seen in the Badlands?” Blake interrupted, glancing at Yang before turning back to the horses.  “We’ll take these two,” she said, gesturing to two specific horses before freeing them from their tethers.

While Blake worked, Yang’s admiration grew.  Her hands never stopped moving, her eyes never stopped analyzing the situation, and she had already freed the first creature before Yang realized someone needed to keep it from running off. Fortunately, one of the drivers jumped down to help, looping a set of reins around the horse’s neck before fitting a bit in its mouth.  Once done, he offered the reins to Yang, who took them and gave the deep-brown steed a good look.

Had she expected to ride to the Badlands on horseback?  Not in a million years.  But who was she to question Blake’s expertise?  So, even though the advisors would scold her for doing this, she hauled herself up onto the horse and pulled the reins when he stepped to the side.

“Woah there,” she muttered, patting his neck to settle him down.

While Yang did that, Blake pulled herself onto a second horse and tested out the reins.  The chocolate-colored horse pranced in place before settling into the feeling of a rider on its back.  Only then did Blake turn to Yang.

“Ready?”

As soon as Yang nodded, Blake whistled and spurred the horse through the palace gates at a trot.  Not wanting to be left behind, Yang dug her heels into her horse’s sides and clicked her tongue to get him moving. Matching the quick pace, she kept a close eye on Blake while they raced through the streets of Vale.  More than a few people rushed out of their way, and several tight turns tested her horsemanship, but her adrenaline flowed as the wind whipped through her hair and cooled her skin.

It had been so long since she last rode that she had forgotten how much she loved it.  There was nothing quite like tearing through the city at a gallop, dodging carts and vendors and people while the sound of hooves filled the air.  Holding herself upright took more effort than she’d needed in some time, but the exhilaration of being free from the palace prevented the exertion from taking too much out of her.

The gates of Vale appeared in the blink of an eye and disappeared just as quickly.  Once outside the protective city walls, they entered the no-man’s-land leading down to the Badlands.  It was only then that Blake slowed and turned around to see if Yang was still with her.  And it was only then that Yang realized their brisk pace through the city had been a test, but a test of what?  Her riding skills?  Her resolve?  Her endurance?

“They’re good horses.”  After patting her mount’s neck, Blake nodded to Yang.  “You’re a good rider.”

“Thank you,” Yang said, pulling even with Blake before easing her horse to a stop.  “Ruby and I used to race.”

“She rides too?”

“She can, but I had a horse, she used her spark.”

“Did she win?”

“Of course,” Yang replied with a laugh.  Blake nodded before nudging her horse forward at a more reasonable pace, and Yang’s smile fell the moment Blake couldn’t see her anymore.  After briefly closing her eyes, she sighed and followed.

She loved Ruby more than anything, and the thought of not being around for her anymore hurt more than the Phage.  But Ruby would be ok.  She was smart, strong, and earned the support of everyone she met.  Vale would be safe in her hands, and she would be safe in Vale.

“It’ll take a little while to get to the nearest settlement,” Blake said from up ahead.  “We’ll keep this pace so we don’t tire these guys out.”

Yang wasn’t sure if Blake saw her nod, but they returned to silence regardless.  Only the sound of hooves broke the quiet as Vale and safety fell behind.

Riding to the Valley used to be a beautiful luxury.  A well-worn path descended from the height of Vale to lush, green plains, crystal clear rivers, and farmlands as far as the eye could see.  Now, the view shifted from shades of brown, to a sick, deadened yellow, to charred black.  Shades of green were only found in overgrown, untended areas serving as a reminder of how nice the Valley used to be.

Yang was determined to do this - she had to see for herself - but she could already tell that this wouldn’t be easy.  As they drew closer, she glanced at Blake for reassurance that this wouldn’t be as bad as expected.  Blake’s increasingly grim expression was far from reassuring.  When the first village came into view, Yang understood why.

From what she remembered, this little hamlet served as a bustling rest stop for travelers moving between Atlas, Vale, and beyond.  Merchants sold fresh fruits, vegetables, and other supplies while several busy saloons offered the opportunity to rest for the night.

The buildings were still there, mostly, but everything was broken, abandoned, and lifeless.

Being so caught up in the jarring change, Yang nearly missed when Blake pulled off of the main path.  Confused by the decision, she nonetheless followed Blake into the woods just outside the village.  The trees were easy to navigate through at first, but the further they trekked, the thicker the brush became.

“What’re we doing?” Yang finally asked, keeping her voice quiet so as not to disturb the silence.

“We’ll leave them here.”  Blake hopped down from her horse, looped the reins around a nearby tree, and patted his side when he started grazing.  “Let’s hope they’re here when we get back.”

“What do you mean ‘hope they’re here?” Yang asked while jumping down from her horse.  Heat radiated through her shins when she hit the ground, making her clench her jaw before looping the reins around the nearest branch.

“Horses are expensive.”

Blake shrugged, so Yang filled in the rest of the explanation for herself.  Expensive meant valuable.  And valuable meant worth stealing.

“Walking back would suck…” she muttered to herself before taking a deep breath, stretching her stiff limbs, and following Blake back the way they’d come.

Considering the long ride down here, she felt better than expected.  A small fire lingered in her shins now, but it wasn’t close to debilitating.  Her spark became the least of her concerns when she noticed Blake’s posture - so rigid it looked like she might crack if she moved too fast.  Her anxiousness set Yang on edge as they picked their way through the woods, and she half-expected to be attacked at any second.

As the trees thinned and the village came into view, she relaxed ever so slightly.  Contrary to Blake’s abundant worry, there didn’t seem to be anyone around.  The streets were empty.  The air devoid of any sounds of life.  Even though the sun was high in the sky, there wasn’t a soul to be found.

“We’ll walk through and that’s it,” Blake whispered as they approached a crumpled pile of rocks.  “Don’t stop and don’t talk to anyone.”

“You act like I’ll run around shouting my name...” Yang grumbled while following Blake over the rocks.  When she set her hand on one to steady herself, however, she realized that they weren’t rocks.  They were pieces of stone that used to form walls, and those walls used to belong to the building they just walked into.

As the unpleasant realization resounded in her mind, she paused and picked out more signs of past life.  Crumbled walls, splintered support beams, shattered windows...all reduced to a pile of rubble burying desks, chairs, and a layer of dirty, illegible papers and other knick-knacks.

“It used to be the town hall,” Blake explained before Yang even asked.

“What happened to it?”

“The great Kingdom of Vale decided there was no need for a town hall.  Not when Atlesian Knights might be inside, at least.”

“Elites did this?” Yang asked, her voice almost too soft to hear.

“Yes.”

“Are you making that up?”

She didn’t know why she asked; she already knew it was true.  That became abundantly clear when Blake shook her head, either at the situation or Yang’s useless attempt to clear her conscience.

“Why would I lie?”

“To convince me to help you.”

Yang wished she could take the words back as soon as they left her lips, but she could do nothing except watch hurt, then anger, flash through Blake’s eyes.

“If you don’t trust me, then why are you here?” Blake snapped, stopping amidst the wreckage and forcing Yang to respond.

Faced with Blake’s annoyance, Yang opened her mouth and tried to explain her turbulent emotions.  She trusted Blake.  She wouldn’t be here if she didn’t trust Blake.  She certainly wouldn’t have agreed to come here alone if she had any reservations about Blake’s intentions.

The assassin...the leader of the Resistance...the person who deserved to hate Yang for all she’d done.  In every interaction they had shared so far, Blake was genuine, forthcoming, and didn’t sugar-coat the realities of war.  She answered plainly, bluntly, and wouldn’t apologize if the truth was too much to handle.

“I’m sorry.”  That was the only thing Yang could say, and she meant it with all of her heart.  “I’m sorry,” she repeated, looking around the building before sighing and letting her shoulders droop.  “I trust you.  I guess I just...don’t want to believe I caused this...”

If only she’d been better somehow.  Issued more stringent orders.  Held people accountable when they messed up.  Or negotiated with the Mad King before any of this happened...

“So you leveled this building?”

“Through my decisions, yes.”

Yang was prepared to accept the blame, but Blake sighed and shook her head.

“Somehow, I doubt you instructed your army to destroy buildings.  You might like to think your orders are followed to the letter, but they’re not.  You don’t control everything, and you aren’t responsible for everything.”

When Blake spun around and walked away, Yang stared after her with conflicting emotions fighting through her chest.  She felt like she was just insulted while also spared the burden of guilt.  For that, she didn’t know if she was offended or grateful - but probably primarily grateful.

That gratitude only grew when she caught up to Blake at the edge of the building and saw the rest of what used to be a busy street.  Now, it was rundown to the point of looking unfit to live.  Some spots had been reduced to rubble just like the town hall.  Weeds grew through the planks of wooden patios.  Trash piled up in the corners.  Small businesses were either boarded up or broken into.  And through it all, an eerie, lifeless silence suggested the entire town was abandoned.

Sticking to the shadows, Blake crept onward with measured footsteps, looking ready to disappear into the dingy, claustrophobic alleys at any second.  Her eyes scanned every nook and cranny, searching for things Yang couldn’t even begin to imagine, and her posture suggested danger lurked around every corner.

“Does anyone even live here?” Yang whispered, doing her best to match Blake’s silent footsteps.

“Of course.  But they know better than to trust strangers.”

Thinking she saw motion, Yang turned to the right but saw nothing other than a dirty curtain drawn over an even dirtier window.  More questions popped into her head while following Blake further down the dusty street, like how many people lived here?  How did they survive?  Where did they get food?

“Why don’t they leave?” she asked out loud.

“And go where?” Blake asked before raising her hands toward the plains and Vale rising in the distance.  “Are you going to open your gates to thousands of refugees?”

“We could try -”

“But you wouldn’t,” Blake cut her off.  “Vale has enough on its hands before bringing in more mouths to feed.  Same with Atlas, if people could even get there.”

Blake’s certainty made Yang feel worse.  She wished she could say that Vale could save the Badlands on its own - that all of these people could have a new place to call home - but Vale’s situation was already dire.

“We don’t have a choice, Yang,” Blake added.  “We survive or we die.  No other options.”

“There are always other options.”

“Not for us.”

Hearing the edge in Blake’s tone, Yang gave up and nodded.  She didn’t want to start an argument, but she didn’t believe that was true.  If she had learned anything from leading Vale, it was that there were always other options.  Yes or no weren’t the only answers.  Survive or die weren’t the only choices.

Blake had already proven herself wrong, though she didn’t realize it.  She decided to kill the Queen of Atlas - survival over death - but stopped when more information revealed itself.  That information led to possibilities that had been buried in plain sight all along, including working with Weiss rather than shedding blood.  Life was more nuanced and multifaceted than anyone could ever understand.  There were always more options, but some of them might still be undiscovered.

So wrapped up in those thoughts, Yang followed Blake around a corner and jumped when Blake threw an arm in front of her.

“Wha-?”

“Shh,” Blake interrupted, keeping her arm in front of Yang and nodding ahead.  Only then did Yang notice the woman crossing the road several hundred feet in front of them.

Distinguishing features were hard to make out from this distance, but the woman was clearly struggling to walk.  Her feet dragged across the ground, scuffing up clouds of dirt with each laborious step, and it wasn’t long before she stopped walking entirely. For a few desperate, painful seconds, she just stood there and stared at the other side of the street, which was only a few steps away yet seemingly out of reach.

The instant she clutched at her heart, Yang understood what kept her rooted in place. The next second, she dropped to her knees and doubled over in pain.  Even at this distance, her agonizing moan reached their ears as she pressed her forehead to the ground.  The sorrowful sound was worse than the silence, and Yang watched with growing horror as the woman’s skin began to glow an unnatural red.

“We have to help,” Yang said, but Blake grabbed her arm when she stepped forward.

“Yang, quiet.”

“She needs help.”  Yang couldn’t watch this again, but when she tried to pull her arm free, Blake’s hand hardened into something so immovable that she immediately gave up.  “Blake -”

“Be quiet.”

When Blake shook Yang by the arm, she finally heard it - hooves pounding across the dirt.  Before she could pinpoint the direction, Blake’s gaze darted to the left.  That was all it took for her to make a decision and drag Yang to the nearby alleyway.

“We can’t leave her -”

The woman hadn’t stood up yet, and she didn’t look like she would get up anytime soon.  The rapidly approaching horses hadn’t registered through her pain, as she held her head in her hands, rocked back and forth, and made that heart-wrenching moan.

“Yang, come on.”

Blake’s grip grew stronger, but Yang dug in her heels and fought against her every step of the way.  She had pulled Yang almost fully into the alleyway now, but she grasped onto the corner of the building and stuck her head around the corner as a group of horses appeared at the far end of the street.

If horses were valuable, then this group was wealthy.  At least a dozen in number, the riders tore down the road at a gallop, kicking up clouds of dust underneath the steady thunder of hooves.  They spotted the woman - they must have - but they didn’t slow.  And the woman didn’t so much as turn her head while they bared down on her.

As soon as the leader of the group drew a long, silver blade, Yang’s struggle increased.

“No,” she whispered, doing everything she could to free herself without hurting Blake in the process.  But Blake’s grip was too strong, and the most she could do was keep herself at the corner of the building and watch the rider angle his horse toward the woman.

He didn’t slow down, she didn’t look up, and it was over in an instant.

Yang opened her mouth to yell, or shout, or something, only to be nearly pulled off her feet and shoved into the nearest doorway.  One of Blake’s hands clamped over her mouth while the other locked onto her wrist, muffling her scream and preventing her from moving.

“Be quiet,” Blake hissed, keeping a tight hold on Yang while the sound of hooves grew louder.  Blake’s posture was tense, but her gaze never left Yang as the group approached.  Had they seen her?  Had they heard her?  Would they look for her next?  Would they do to her what they just did to that innocent woman?

As that thought crossed her mind, Yang felt it.  An emotion as strong as the horror and sadness at what she just witnessed.  A flame in her chest growing unchecked.

With the horses nearly to the alley, her spark ignited.  It leaped from her control and poured fire through her veins.  Suddenly, every inch of her was ablaze.

She struggled to get it under control as voices neared, but it burned.  It seared as bright and hot as her anger at what they did.  They killed that woman.  Murdered her.  Who cared if she had the Phage?  She had a right to life like the rest of them.

Yang couldn’t hold onto that thought much longer as fire raged in her chest, spread through her limbs, and seared every nerve with white-hot agony.  She couldn’t stop it.  No matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t stop it.  It invaded every part of her, determined to consume her from the inside out.

Blake was still holding onto her.  Blake was too close.  Yang had to control it.

But the heat grew and grew.  It was everywhere, it was everything, she couldn’t tell what was her and what was the sun burning her alive.  The scorching heat spread to her skin next, and Blake’s eyes widened before she quickly let go and backed away.

Finally free, Yang dropped to her knees and gritted her teeth, trying to push her spark back into her heart.  Everything was disappearing to the pain - the dirt beneath her hands, the walls surrounding her, Blake.  Nothing existed except the inferno rushing through her.

But it wasn’t the end.

She didn’t know how long it lasted, but eventually the pain began to fade.  It receded from her legs and arms and retreated to her heart where it belonged.  Her senses returned much slower, but eventually she heard her strangled gasps for air, saw her fists clutching handfuls of dirt, and felt the layer of perspiration covering her skin. Then she looked up and found Blake staring at her with a mixture of concern and fear.

“I’m sorry,” she got out, touching her heart before pushing herself up.  The effort sent her stumbling on unsteady feet, but she managed to lean against the wall for support.   “I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to - I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

“No,” Blake said, but she eyed Yang warily and kept a safe distance.

“Sorry, the stress - and I...I didn’t expect…”

She motioned to the street but didn’t know what else to say.  How else could she explain that reaction with anything but the truth?  All she could do was hope Blake believed that she freaked out after seeing someone needlessly killed right in front of her.

But Blake didn’t say anything for a long, long time.  Instead, she watched Yang catch her breath and remained silent when Yang finally recovered the strength to stand on her own.  Her thoughts, however, remained on the poor, nameless woman.  The woman suffered in the same way, but her ending had been written for her without question or remorse.

Eyes filling with tears, Yang turned away from Blake and tried to mask her sniffles.

“Why?” she whispered to the ground.

“There are different forms of mercy…” Blake answered softly, and Yang squeezed her eyes shut as another round of emotions rippled through her chest.

It was.  It was mercy that, instead of the relentless fire, the end came swiftly and quietly.  It was mercy to save someone from the Phage’s blazing agony.  When her time came, she would probably beg for the same mercy, but to do so without even stopping…without even pausing to grieve another life lost too soon…

“How are you ok with that?” she asked, her voice nothing above a whisper as she finally turned back to Blake.

“I’m not, Yang,” Blake replied with a waver in her voice.  “Why do you think I joined the Resistance?  Why do you think I did the things I did?  Because I wanted to?”

When her voice choked up, Blake shook her head and wrapped her arms around herself.  For the first time since they met, Yang saw the feelings Blake struggled to hide.  The pain, the loss, the sadness of watching her home descend into darkness.  Fighting a losing battle.  Struggling to survive.  Wondering why she lived when so many died.

She was tired, scared, and angry, but at the same time stronger than anyone Yang had ever met.  The violence had made her harder.  Just like her spark, it toughened her skin and protected her from getting hurt.  But, in that one look, Yang saw who Blake was before all of this.  A girl with her head stuck in the clouds while her nose was stuck in a book.  A believer.  A dreamer.

The war had stolen those dreams.  It forced her to adapt and become the person she was today.  And for that, Yang had never felt more remorseful.

“We’re going to fix this.”

When Blake sighed and looked around the alleyway, at everything that was lost or broken, Yang stepped closer and gently turned Blake back to her.  She felt more determined now than she had in quite some time, especially when those amber eyes trained upon her.

“I promise,” she whispered.  “We’ll fix this.  No matter what needs to be done, you have my word - you have Vale’s support.  We’ll turn this around.  We’ll make this better.”

She couldn’t go back in time, but she could pour everything she had left into correcting her mistakes.  Before the Phage claimed her, she could lay the groundwork for new hopes and dreams.  With Blake’s help...they could make a difference.

“I believe you.”

Hearing that soft admission, and knowing how hard it must be for Blake to have faith in anyone, Yang flashed a smile before surging emotions forced her gaze to the ground between their feet.  The threat of tears quickly returned, but she cleared her throat and tried to blink them away.  She didn’t want to cry, but she couldn’t explain how much Blake’s faith meant to her.

At the end of the day, she was the leader of Vale.  Whether or not Vale’s armies followed her instructions, she was responsible for their actions.  She was responsible for what happened here, and that burden filled her with guilt, sadness, and more pain than the Phage left her with.

It was only when Blake set a hand on her arm that she looked up and lost herself in warm, patient amber eyes.

“This isn’t your fault.”

A sad gasp slipped through Yang’s lips as tears welled in her eyes.

“I wish that was true…”

“Yang…”

If Blake had more to say, she didn’t.  She shook her head and squeezed Yang’s arm instead.  Her eyes never left Yang’s, but there was no judgment in her own.

Then, before Yang fully grasped what was happening, Blake pulled her into a hug.  The contact surprised her so much that she tensed but, before Blake let go, quickly relaxed and returned the embrace.  Blake was soft yet strong and supportive in a way that made Yang’s heart soar higher than it had in quite some time.  It was just a hug...but it was much more than that.  Comfort...reassurance...forgiveness, even.

For a few seconds, she didn’t have to be the Queen of Vale.  An entire kingdom wasn’t looking to her for leadership and guidance.  She didn’t have to be strong, immovable, and certain for their sakes.  For a few seconds...she held Blake close, feeling Blake’s chest rise and fall with every breath, and accepted that she was nothing more than a pretty face living on borrowed time.  Her spark may be strong, but she was weak.

In that moment, Blake let her be as weak, broken, and sad as she needed.  The unspoken permission was such a relief that she wanted to stay there, tucked in Blake’s arms, forever.  Unfortunately, she had to pull herself together.  Someone had to lead Vale out of this mess and, in Ruby’s absence, that someone was her.

So she took a deep breath and gently squeezed Blake closer before pulling away and meeting Blake’s gaze.  Blake’s arms slid down Yang’s before coming to a rest near her elbows, but Blake didn’t move away.  If anything, she looked worried about letting go.

“I’m sorry you had to see that...” she whispered, but Yang shook her head.

“Don’t be.  I’m the one who’s sorry.  I’m...so sorry...”

Feeling the tears threaten to return, Yang hung her head and sighed.  She probably couldn’t apologize enough, but words only went so far.  What she needed now were actions...lots of them.

“Do you want to head back now?”

The question was yet more permission to admit her fragility in body and mind.  Looking around the dingy alley, she wished that she had half of the strength she portrayed.  Maybe then she could bear to witness more.  But between the mental struggle and her unreliable spark...any more was probably pressing her luck.

“Yeah…” she sighed, avoiding Blake’s gaze while pulling herself back together.  “Yeah, let’s go back.”

Without a word, Blake led them out of the village just as quietly as they arrived.  Her gaze remained pointedly forward, refusing to acknowledge the scene behind them, but Yang couldn’t help looking back.  The woman’s body lay in the street, and Yang couldn’t stop wondering how long she might stay before someone gave her a proper burial, if that happened at all.

It didn’t matter how many reports Yang read on the situation in the Badlands.  It didn’t matter how much detail Blake used to describe it to her.  None of that mattered because none of it was remotely close to reality.  She thought it was bad, but she was wrong - it was much, much worse.

She didn’t have much time left.  She didn’t have much strength left.  But she would give everything she had to make this better for Blake, for the Badlands, for Vale…for everyone.