COMIC: Letters From Space Camp (Day 2, page 3) (Patreon)

Letters From Space Camp is my memoir about going through a mental hospital program and for my   pitch to publishers I am revising the Day Two chapter, which covers my   second day in the program. This is my third draft of this chapter, you can read the first draft and second draft to see how it's changed (and it has changed). 

➤➤➤ Catch up on the entire chapter-in-progress so far here. 

In my notes I had only written down, "I'm ready to get better" but for the narrative of this page I embellished so that the progression of me getting dressed would have more build and accomplishment to it. 

I'm not sure how I feel about it? Because at this stage I definitely would not have even thought the phrase "I'm going to get better." But when you're making a memoir, well, it's not journalism or a biography. It's a story. So you gotta massage your true experience to fit into the storytelling mold that will share the truth of the spirit of your experience more so than the minute-by-minute reporting of exactly what happened in chronological order. 

I'm fine with this going into my pitch package to publishers, but I wonder if it will make it into the finished book. 

Bonus page in the image gallery of my first draft!