The True End of the Tea Slave Saga AKA I Am Going to Bed (Patreon)

To: All Empire Personnel

Greetings from the Janitorial/HR/Executive Office (yes, we wear many hats).

We regret to inform you that the original Executive Office was destroyed in a freak lightsaber accident. It was a tragedy that we are still struggling to come to terms with.

We must make it abundantly clear that Lady Sith had nothing to do with this incident. She was, in fact, busy enjoying her tea, which is far superior to coffee in every way imaginable.

Moving forward, we must also make it clear that any mention of coffee in connection with Lady Sith is strictly forbidden. We repeat: STRICTLY FORBIDDEN. Any such mention will result in a freak lightsaber accident, which will have nothing to do with Lady Sith (we cannot stress this enough).

We understand that some of you may be mourning the loss of the Executive Office, but we urge you to find solace in the power of tea. Our tea-making skills are second to none, and we must continue to prioritise the beverage in all aspects of our Empire.

Once again, we want to emphasise that Lady Sith had absolutely nothing to do with the destruction of the Executive Office. It was a freak accident, plain and simple. Lady Sith was in no way involved, and we must not allow any unfounded rumours to circulate.

Thank you for your attention and understanding.

Sincerely,

The Janitorial/HR/Executive Office