CONTRACT FOR EMPIRE TEA SLAVE IN SERVICE TO LADY SITH (Patreon)

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CONTRACT FOR EMPIRE TEA SLAVE IN SERVICE TO LADY SITH

Congratulations on your decision to join the esteemed ranks of Empire Tea Slaves! Before you begin your career, we ask that you read and sign the following contract, which outlines the terms and conditions of your employment:

JOB DESCRIPTION:

As an Empire Tea Slave, you will be responsible for making tea, serving tea, and avoiding the wrath of Lady Sith at all costs. You will be required to work long hours, in a variety of dangerous situations, and with minimal breaks (because tea never sleeps).

BENEFITS:

1. A Competitive Salary - You will be paid a living wage (at least until you meet an unfortunate end).
2. A Comprehensive Benefits Package - Our benefits package includes dental, vision, and life insurance (because you'll need it).
3. A Personal Tea Set - Enjoy a complimentary tea set of your very own (which you'll be required to use on the job), but beware – if you break it, you'll have to replace it (or suffer the consequences).
4. Access to First Aid - We provide first aid kits to all Tea Slaves, to help with those minor burns and lacerations (because Lady Sith likes her tea piping hot).
5. The Chance to Serve Lady Sith - This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to serve the most powerful (and terrifying) woman in the galaxy (just don't mess up the tea).

CONTRACT TERMS:

1. Termination - Your employment may be terminated at any time, for any reason (or no reason at all).
2. Safety - You are responsible for your own safety and well-being. The Empire is not liable for any injuries, loss of limbs, or decapitations that may occur on the job.
3. Loyalty - You are expected to be loyal to Lady Sith and the Empire at all times. Any attempts at subversion or rebellion will be met with swift and brutal punishment (probably involving a lightsaber).
4. Tea - You must be able to make tea to Lady Sith's exact specifications, at any time, and in any location (even if it's in the middle of a firefight).
5. Confidentiality - You are not allowed to disclose any information about Lady Sith's tea preferences or her daily routine, under penalty of death.

By signing below, you acknowledge that you have read and agree to the terms and conditions of this contract. Welcome to the Empire Tea Slavery – may the Force (and Lady Sith's tea) be with you.

(Signature)