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Your company seems to have lost my very important "package", so to make it up to me, you deliver a much more 'realistic' replacement and hope it's to my satisfaction.

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Aussie Phil

Hay Lacey, I need your address, I have a package for you! I'm just need to hand deliver it, in fact it's in my hand now! It's warm and I have to keep wiping one end of it because it's leaking! It's got two attachments that are a bit swollen, so I need to get it to you fast before they burst! Do you know hard it is to type with just your non dominant hand? I sorry I forgot who I was talking to !!!! Xxx 😂